<p>Regarding merit scholarships, check whether there is a college GPA to keep them. If there is, consider the risk of losing it (in the context of how high the needed college GPA is) and whether the school will be affordable if it is lost (and only need-based financial aid, as estimated by the net price calculator, is available).</p>
<p>Thanks to all for the advice. We’ve followed much of it already. We will be visiting the two remaining campuses on his list next month. All the schools have his desired major and likely alternates (based upon his current interests). We have a matrix outlining costs, travel requirements, and even how many AP credits would count at each school. All will be within our overall price range, but some will be more comfortable financially than others. My son sees himself liking some aspects of a small school but also can see the benefits of a large SEC school. He doesn’t think he wants to go Greek but hasn’t ruled it out. </p>
<p>Bottom line is I think he can be happy and successful at any of the widely varying schools on his list. I just wish I could help him to narrow his choices somewhat and lower the stress. It may not be possible. I am going to drop the subject altogether over the holidays so he can clear his head.</p>
<p>Personally I would not do anything right now. There is no rush. Give it a break over the holidays, don’t talk about it. </p>
<p>My daughter wasn’t sure what school until someone asked her, so where are you going and she just blurted it out.</p>
<p>Why spend months discussing? Once you get the Rd results itll be a whole new ballgame.</p>
<p>If this was my child, I would let it go at this point. Breath. And let it sit. </p>
<p>In the spring he will have wiggled down the list himself substantially without even realizing it.</p>
<p>Loweringthe stress is notntalking about it all the time. Make a deal to not talk about it.</p>
<p>"Tell him to think about other things–the holidays, enjoying his senior year, " - That is sound advice. </p>
<p>My son’s top choice school was near the bottom of the heap until Feburary Candidates Weekend. Arrange visits to the other schools as possible. Then give it all time to “marninate”.</p>
<p>Just FYI, a know of a few schools that have these cross enrollment type programs so you can take classes there if your school doesn’t offer it. That might be a big school thing he’d want that he still might be able to get at a small school. Same thing with other aspects of big school. Tulane and Loyola, for example, are next door to each other (literally, like not even down the street. Next door.) and the schools can use each other’s respective resources. So Loyola students that wanted a 3,000 person undergrad can have that while still enjoying the perks that Tulane, a slightly larger school, offers. </p>
<p>See if any of his schools have this type of relationship with another school. May be a hidden bonus you haven’t thought about </p>
<p>But like the above posters said, I would drop it during the holidays and let him enjoy his last winter break truly as a child in your home.</p>
<p>
If this is the actual list, I’d say that unless the decision is money or a specific program, here’s what I’d think:
In my opinion, St. Mary’s College of Maryland is the “best” school on that list–it’s a public LAC, designed to be an “all honors” college. On the other hand, it’s small, and is in a fairly remote location. Somebody preferring the big college experience might prefer Alabama or Georgia.</p>
<p>That is not the actual list. Some are correct, some aren’t, and some are omitted.</p>
<p>Sent from my SCH-I510 using CC</p>
<p>He doesn’t need to decide now. He technically has until May 1st to have his decision in. I think once March rolls around and you start getting financial aid packages in the mail, those may narrow down his choices. If he is still stuck on a couple schools, have him visit those schools once he knows what they will give him for merit/financial aid and see if one feels better to him.</p>
<p>Yep, we will do a couple of accepted student days when he narrows the list a bit.</p>
<p>The one reason I would like him to decide earlier rather than later is housing related. At some schools dorm placement is based upon the date deposits are placed. Waiting until May 1st could cause him to live in a last choice dorm.</p>
<p>I think most schools base dorms on deposit day. Check the various websites and see if those deposits are refundable. Some schools are. Put a deposit in at those schools.</p>
<p>I think the only way to narrow down his list now is to do second visits. Spend the next however many Saturday’s and visit all the schools you can. If they are all good academically, something on those visits will stand out and make it “the one”. It’s hard. Our DD had 9 schools to pick from. They all had pros and cons and were all great choices for her and she would have been fine at any of them. In the end, it came down to the school that gave her the most money.</p>
<p>unless money is no concern, then student needs a clear understanding of exactly how much financial gift parent is willing/able to decide. Presumably, this discussion occurred before apps, but if not, get it done -pronto!
Also, in a similar vein- how does student view college’s main priority? To take subjects of interest? To expand his mind? To educate himself to open career opportunities? An investment in his future? If it’s an investment, then seriously consider the cost vs. the true expected income. We often see on this forum, students that assume so much debt they have a far lower standard of living than expected.</p>
<p>Money is absolutely a concern, and this has been clearly communicated with my son. Happily he has a good GPA and excellent SAT scores and has received great merit awards from the schools that have already communicated merit packages. Don’t know what we’ll hear from the rest of his schools, but with “decent” awards all 11 can be affordable for us. We will absolutely not let him go to a school that will require him to take out more than nominal (<$2500/yr) student loans.</p>
<p>I frankly don’t understand students who take on huge debt for undergraduate degrees in general. I saw a news story about the huge amount of student loan debt in the country and was shocked at how many students graduated with a Bachelor’s Degree and $100K or more in loans. While there are a select few who may make enough $ out of school to pay back such a huge debt (and I emphasize FEW), for most they will be under water for decades to come.</p>
<p>We are in the same situation with dd and this thread is interesting to read. She has 6 acceptances and has scholarship money for 5 of the 6 and expecting the 6th to come soon. Waiting on one answer at end of January. I think she is going to have to write out the pros and cons and list her priorities. One thing that is important to dd is to study one semester abroad. All of her schools have a program (or 10!) but she needs to investigate with the double major that she is wanting to do - which schools is it really feasible and if she is willing to do it in the summer instead. Sooooooooo many things to think about. I have been telling people that she will probably decide on April 30th!</p>
<p>Have you considered a dart board? Wherever he hits, he goes.</p>
<p>Seriously, the odds of it really mattering much in the end are slim. If he can be happy at any of them, then why not a dart board? Students make choices based upon the quality of some random tour guide, why not a dart board?</p>
<p>I think sometimes if there are a lot of choices then it overwhelms our decision making capacity. Something we used to do when there were a lot of choices to pick from (and may end up doing with D if her list comes down to 7-8): Say “between A and B, which would you choose?”. If there is a quick decisive response “A” then “B” is out. If not, both stay. Then try “A or C?” </p>
<p>Do this over a period of days so they don’t get overwhelmed. If you can narrow to 3 or 4, then overnight visits can possibly be arranged. These really helped S to choose among his final 3.</p>
<p>We had an extremely indecisive daughter, too. We tried the Pros and Cons lists, but it was still confusing because some pros/cons are more important than others. So we had her go back and “weight” each pro and con 1-5, depending on how important it was to her. For instance, a warm climate might be a pro… but is it an absolute necessity (weighted a 5), or just something nice but not essential (weighted 1 or 2)? If tiny dorms is on the con list, is that a deal-breaker (5) or just a minor inconvenience (1)? </p>
<p>That helped a LOT! For some schools, she had more pros than cons, but after weighting them, found that the cons actually outweighted the pros. She was able to eliminate quite a few schools that way. </p>
<p>Also, we didn’t include Cost of Attendance in her pros/cons lists, but used it to make the final decision. Once she’d narrowed it down to 2 schools, we saw that the one with the highest “pros” score was also the most expensive (of course!). Then we discussed as a family whether the difference in cost was worth those extra “pros” points.</p>
<p>That’s helpful jea828 - thanks maybe we will try that. I almost feel like we should start that now so when the final financial packages come in we will have that as a final decision.</p>
<p>At this point last year (when D already had a handful of acceptances), she was very adverse to even discussing a “decision.” I kept thinking, if she could just choose from what she had NOW, it would be much easier come March when the rest of her decisions came rolling in. But the more I brought it up, the more she tuned out. Besides just being a tough decision, I think at that point it was really starting to hit her what all of this meant… that soon she’d be moving out, growing up, leaving friends, etc. Making a college decision would make it “real”, and she just wasn’t ready to tackle that emotionally yet. </p>
<p>So I backed off for a while, and just left things laying around for her to find and read: articles about the school, student reviews, lists of statistics about each school, info specific to her major and interests, lists of clubs at each school, info about the area, etc. I also called the admissions offices and asked them to “hit me with everything ya got!” so we had loads of pamphlets and brochures laying around! I didn’t tell her to read them, but hoped she would. I always felt like I was checking a mousetrap to see if my “bait” had been disturbed!</p>
<p>“We had her go back and ‘weight’ each pro and con” - We once did that when deciding amongst three different different house plan/builder/lot combos. They were still ties, even with weighting. But it turned out that a 4th choice we had ruled out due to extra $10K in price was a clear winner. We’ve lived in it since 1993 ;)</p>