My Yale Experience - Current Yale Senior

Colleges and Universities A-Z Yale University
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<p>Hi guys, as a Yale senior with my senior thesis behind me, I decided to take a few minutes to post about my overall Yale experience these past four years and what it's been like for me. I remember being a high schooler and using this forum frequently, and so I wanted to give back by sharing my story.</p>

<p>First, I'd like to start out by saying that where you go to school may seem like a huge deal when you are in high school and applying to different places, but it's really not. Ultimately after the first few months, you forget all about the other schools you got into/applied to because you become so immersed in the place where you are. I say that as a disclaimer because I know plenty of Yale students who had a great time here and others who probably would have had a better time if they'd gone to their state school or wherever else. To each his or her own. </p>

<p>Overall I have mixed feelings about my Yale experience. I can't reveal which residential college I'm in, but I will say it is one of the relatively younger residential colleges. I stayed on campus all four years, which can become quite stale after a while. Sure, you get to know everyone who lives in your residential college, but it can also turn into a small-world, gossipy place with no where to run (no, this didn't happen to me, but I know people it happened to.) Lots people I know had terrific FroCos, but I wasn't so lucky. My FroCo was insensitive and rude. From Freshman year onward, its been a fairly depressing experience. </p>

<p>One complaint that I've heard over and over from Ivy League students is the lack of real, sustainable friendships they make in college. I'm not going to speak for the entirety of Yale, but I have definitely found it difficult to connect with people here. Yeah, it's true you can join a club, but don't be surprised if outside of club meetings members don't even acknowledge you. It's very common at Yale to ignore people you know when you see them walking down the street/in dining halls, etc. </p>

<p>Yale also has an overly-dominant drinking culture that honestly makes the social scene really boring. The average night consists of pre-games with bad vodka in stuffy common rooms, followed by more awkward social events where people just stand around looking and don't dance. The fact that Yale's drinking policy is so loose allows people to centralize their social activities around excessive drinking, which becomes really repetitive and boring if you're even a moderate drinker. I mean seriously, how many times can you play beer pong with dirty pong balls in a fire escape? </p>

<p>The social scene can get slightly better senior year, when most people are 21 and can go to the bars. That's the one good thing about New Haven. There are lots of great restaurants and bars with good food and drinks. This is fun of course, provided that you have a solid friend group that's willing to go out on weekends. If you're looking for some good places to check out, I would recommend Viva's and Box 63. For restaurants, I love Caseus, and I'd also recommend Sitar. Finally, late night food...definitely Wenzels from Alpha Delta, G-Heav, and Insomnia cookies...when they're available. Shopping in the Have is dismal, but then again you're not there to shop, lol. Sometimes Laila Rowe has good cheap accessories though. </p>

<p>Okay, now I can cover Academics, which is by far the best part of my review. Yale is without a doubt, a great place to go to learn. While I hated the social scene, I loved the academics. Professors are so chill and approachable, and I've really learned from the best here. The resources Yale has are absolutely untouchable. I'm kind of disappointed I didn't frequent the Beinecke more often than I did, because they've got stuff there you just wouldn't believe, like a Gutenberg bible (I KNOW, RIGHT???). Overall, I've developed some great relationships with professors and gotten my name on some publications, so for that it was worth it.
Further, for what it's worth, Yale students generally are willing to help each other out with academic stuff, so there definitely isn't a cutthroat environment. That's also worth a lot, considering what it's like at other ivies. </p>

<p>Lastly, there is definitely an overall chillness in style at Yale that I appreciate. My friends at other schools are constantly fussing about appearance and style and all that, whereas here you can just chill and wear pretty much whatever you want and no one cares. While overall the style culture does lean towards a fusion of hipster and preppy, there's no real predominant style. </p>

<p>OKAY, SO LETS RECAP:</p>

<p>PROS:
- Academics
-Chill, laid-back environment
-Excellent Professors
- Resources </p>

<p>CONS:
- obnoxious people (by far not all Yale students, but enough to make it a concern)
- shallow friendships
- New Haven
- Drinking-obsessed culture </p>

<p>My opinion isn't the gospel, so don't attack me for sharing how I feel.</p>

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<p>Do you feel prepared for what you intend to do next (job/grad school/etc)? Did Yale help you find your way to what comes next for you?</p>

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<p>@ tamara6, yes I can honestly say that Yale has prepared me. I’m going into finance after graduation, and I can tell you that having Yale on my resume and going through their on-campus recruiting program definitely helped me to secure a job and past internships. Yale’s name is pretty powerful…way more powerful than I realized when I was applying. I suppose that’s another one of the upsides of going here. Even though there were definitely things I didn’t like about my experience, I believe that in long run I will be better off for having gone here.</p>

<p>This actually brings me to another really important point: a fair amount of students end up switching intended majors throughout the course of their time here. This is especially true for people who intend to major in STEM things. i know people who have switched from majors like comp sic and biochemical engineering to majors like political science and literature. there are a few who switch the other way around. one girl in my year started out as a linguistics major and after majoring in multiple STEM subjects ended up with multiple PhD offers for Computer Science. </p>

<p>College will definitely change you, but to quote Carson the Butler in Downton Abbey, “What would life be if we didn’t allow it to change us?”</p>

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<p>Or anywhere.</p>

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<p>Thanx YS13 for sharing your experiences. Some items you cite, I can definitely concur - - others veer from my experience. My experiences weren’t as mixed as yours has been. I’ll repeat your caveat: this was only my experience and yours is as valid as mine.
You’re absolutely correct about students not taking advantage of the many treasures on campus (I didn’t even SEE the Gutenberg Bible until I came to visit campus for a reunion) despite the fact that I probably waked by the museum 3-4 times a day for four years. I would have visited NYC more, other nearby colleges and sought more meaningful times w/instructors.</p>

<p>Socially, I loved my time. Although I experienced the awkward first meetings w/my freshman suite of six, by 2nd semester, I was fast friends with three of them. We ended up being a cohesive group of friends of about 15-17 guys/gals in our Residential College through our four years. We played together, studied together and partied together. Our “partying” Fr and Soph years was rather typical I suspect w/most of campus. By our Jr and Sr years, we mellowed out and we sought broader and more alcohol-restrained socializing. A “dominant” drinking culture wouldn’t be how I characterize the social scene as I felt we enjoyed ourselves even more even at the time when alcohol was less present.</p>

<p>Our mega-group of friends was pretty integrated w/the rest of the RC and many of us headed up social ventures within the college. Come senior year, it was definitely difficult to see the end of our cohort. 20 of us rented a house on the Carolina seashore before graduation to chill and relax and it was a great bookend to our time together. In subsequent years, we’ve remained close. 13 of them came to my wedding and I’ve been to most of theirs. Our spouses all marvel at the number of people we each call “our college friends”. We came from a variety of backgrounds, ethnically, economically, geographically and religiously. We had a wide spectrum of political beliefs and have gone onto a wide spread of professions (arts, clergy, law, publishing, business). We loved our time together, constantly trying to outdo each other in humor, practical jokes or internal mayhem. I may have been just very lucky. I can honestly say I lived out “Bright College Years”.</p>

<p>It may be my personality as well. I’m very social and gravitated towards others like me. I’m sure there were loners or obnoxious boors – but they weren’t in my sphere of everyday life so didn’t affect me.</p>

<p>YS13, I suspect you were in ES or MC. It’s been said that the multiplicity of singles did not help the general cohesiveness of those RCs. I lived in suites of six, three, five and finally eight during my four years. </p>

<p>As for the #s who diverge from STEM, I don’t find that a negative whatsoever. I’ve posed this to students who state a preference for one major or career: “What if I showed you a place where your lifelong dream could be whisked away from you …</p>

<p>because you happened to stumble upon something better?” </p>

<p>Some people are spooked. Others are intrigued. Yale is definitely a place to explore other options.</p>

<p>GL to you YS13.</p>

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<p>My experience was much like T26E4’s. My son is a senior now, and my daughter is a freshman, and I do think the social scene has changed, and not (in my opinion) for the better–much more pregaming and focus on drinking. Ironically, I think this is largely because of the change in the drinking age, which was 18 when I was there. Still, both of my kids are loving their overall experience, despite some complaints about the social scene.</p>

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<p>I will chime in as another alum whose experience mirrors T26’s. My friendships were very deep and have lasted decades after college. The residential college system had a lot to do with this. I have Yale friends spanning eight decades and the love for the place and the loyalty to it are almost unrivaled.</p>

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<p>In response to everyone’s posts, I’ll say this. I definitely feel that Yale is a place where either you fit or you don’t. I made the mistake of not visiting any of the colleges I applied, not even for Bulldog days, which eventually ended up being my downfall. Maybe if I’d gone and observed the culture, I wouldn’t have chosen Yale. I think it’s the type of place where you have to be okay with everything about your experience being centered in a tiny community. Coming from a huge, metropolitan city, traveling the world and gaining different experiences, I found Yale’s bubble in New Haven very confining. </p>

<p>This being said, I did end up in a secret society, joining social clubs like Fence and Feb, and other things like that, in addition to more interest-based clubs. I’m fairly well-liked around campus, but in the end, I don’t feel like I’ve met too many people I will stay in touch with in the long run after college. But that’s just me.</p>

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<p>My observation as the parent of a Yale student, is that my D’s social circle there is massive. Over her 4 years, she has been very involved in more than 6 organizations (that I can think of - could be more), 2 of which were social clubs. D is the sociable type, and enjoys parties, so that could make the difference. When I walk around campus with her, she seems to know every other person we pass (exaggerating, of course:)) I can understand that some students might not like the geographic “bubble” of Yale, but I am surprised that some would find the social connections there lacking. It could be that if one is the type who is not interested in attending parties, joining clubs, etc. you may have a difficult time making social connections regardless of where you go to college.</p>

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<p>I think the communities in which people develop strong connections here are the ones with which they spend a <em>lot</em> of time and share interests. Honestly, my residential college hasn’t been my primary community at Yale. Most of my close friends are in my classes or are in my wider cultural community. </p>

<p>And parties aren’t a good way to make close friends… in my opinion, anyway.</p>

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<p>

This is a question not necessarily directed to OP. What could be a place otherwise, i.e. you kind of fit in but not reall? :slight_smile: I guess I’m trying to understand what other types of colleges in terms of “fit” and “feel” are like.</p>

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Is this about the location? Is it because the environment of New Haven restricts students from having any experience outside campus? That would make sense, but in general I would expect college life should be mainly about experience on campus. There are schools such as NYU vitually with no campus and “everyone” seems to be going to school part-time, if you know what I mean, and I’d want to avoid college life like that. Boston and New York would probably be better locations to “have a life” (maybe OP would like Harvard or Columbia better) but underage you’d still not be able to go have a lot of fun off campus. Right? Not to mention, for students, most of those fun places must be prohibitively expensive. What would an ideal college be like?</p>

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<p>@Benley, It’s not solely about the location. Overall the social scene here is just flat out awkward at times when compared to other colleges. I’m just being honest based on what i’ve observed. I’m a social person, and I have lots of acquaintances. My complaint, as I’ve stated before, is that it’s hard to make friends. like real friends. the kind who really care about your well being and who you really care for too. maybe my definition of friend is just different.</p>

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<p>Maybe I’m lucky, but I definitely have a solid group of friends here who care about me and who would drop things to come to my rescue if need. However, Yale’s culture somewhat promotes having a huge circle of acquaintances (“let’s grab a meal!”), but I made the decision that having a small number of close friends was more important to me and I was fortunate enough to actually meet people who I clicked with. I might not be the typical Yale student though…</p>

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<p>Just to give another perspective, prospective students may want to read this thread:
<a href=“http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/yale-university/1425303-curiosity-ivies.html#post15125713[/url]”>http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/yale-university/1425303-curiosity-ivies.html#post15125713&lt;/a&gt;
I had posted on it with a rather lengthy review of Yale, written by my S, a current student. Obviously, everyone has differing opinions, but in my experience with the Yalies that I know (current and past students), most absolutely love their time there.</p>

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<p>This would not be my experience at all. Although I did not click with my freshman year roomates, I chose a group sophomore year that I stayed with until graduation. To this day we fly across the country to be with each other and to lend support at good times and at times of loss. The “confining” nature of RC life you speak of enhanced the intensity of our relationships compared to a school where the majority of upper classmen live of campus.</p>

<p>The drinking culture you speak of does concern me but I don’t know how this pre-gaming with cheap hard liquor differs from school to school with a 21 year old drinking age. Back in the age of the dinosaurs, the drinking age was 18 and despite ready access to beer at parties everywhere, the current drinking culture is more dangerous.</p>

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<p>My daughter is just a frosh at Yale, but she has loved her suite mates, and several of them are rooming together again next year. She and her actual roommate are truly best friends, along with another friend from her FroCo group. Already they have had their ups & downs of college life and they have been a great support for each other. I know last semester when DD had a final she was particularly terrified of, one of the besties was sitting on the doorstep outside the final waiting there to comfort her in case it had gone badly. It had.</p>

<p>I know my DD and her suite mates might have just been lucky, but they consider Yale roommate pairings the eHarmony of dorm life. They have different interests, talents, and different fields of study, but I am pretty confident she & her roommate will be friends for life. </p>

<p>It’s a pretty extensive questionnaire Yale acceptees fill out before room assignments are given. YaleSenior13 may have not had the best of luck with lasting friendships, but it doesn’t mean others will have the same experience as him. This is true at most colleges. Everyone’s experience is uniquely their own. There are no guarantees.</p>

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<p>FWIW: My son is a sophomore at Yale and last year wrote, in part, the following for his financial aid renewal application: </p>

<p>“I seem to have lucked out with my housing situation. My dorm is on the first floor, right by the stairs. The door is often left open, and many members of the entryway drop in daily. At night, a large group of us gather in our room, where, for hours, we end up debating random topics: universal morality and the nature of infinity to which flavor of Easy Mac tastes the best. While sometimes frustrating, the discussions are almost always thought provoking. I’ve never been more thankful to be surrounded by highly intelligent people.” </p>

<p>Finding and making friends has been very easy for my son at Yale – much more so than my daughter, who is attending a different ivy.</p>