need help

<p>I'm really not happy here at my university (not Berkeley). I hate being here. I don't know how to be a person, I think. I guess I never figured that out. I don't know how to act or interact with people, I haven't made ANY new friends here at my university, I don't know how things are supposed to be done, I don't know why other people act the way they do. I have no confidence and am insecure. I hate how awkward I am with regards to everything in a social situation. I hate my inability to navigate a social situation. I've been hurt a lot by some of the people around me—this goes back all the way to high school. I just feel like going crazy. I feel overwhelmed by all this stuff I feel. I feel like maybe my mom and dad have at least in part caused this because they would just keep me at home all day and their seeming lack of knowledge about social things. To be honest, I am tired of eating alone all the time. I hate my personality. I hate how people are forced to act towards me because of my personality. I don't like my life right now. </p>

<p>The one thing that's going well is my academics. I usually do well in my science classes. What should I do?</p>

<p>I really want to hug you right now! I was in your situation (and still sort of am)! In high school, people stepped all over me and so I became socially inadept because my confidence was torn up by these people. And I've been very "stay at home," too b/c of the way I was brought up. But, when I came to college, I decided to change all my feelings of loneliness. I just started talking to people and if they were mean or whatever, I just was like, their loss! And I've met some great, sweet people who like me for who I am! I'm still a little socially awkward sometimes, but I've learned to love myself. Please do the same! Force yourself to go outside and converse with people. I feel that at the university level, people are a (little) more mature and will be more positive! Do something about this, otherwise it won't go away <em>hugs</em></p>

<p>I am a little cynical, so I hope the OP is not a troll or anything ;) but if genuine [first off apologies for the suspicious demeanor], I'll say that one great way to meet people is to start working on them with homework. I am not antisocial, but I definitely am not a social butterfly. I met some of the best friends I have at Berkeley through discussing homework with them, and you know..you eventually meet up for lunch, etc. </p>

<p>Don't be lonely! At a big school, you can't expect people to automatically know you, but if you're lonely, imagine -- there are likely very many like you, or many who're at least very sympathetic towards this.</p>

<p>The OP should go to a counselor (either at the school health center or privately) who practices cognitive behavorial therapy. That counselor will give the OP weekly assignments that will help the OP to build social skills. CBT is a practical, action/skills based type of therapy that focuses on building the skills necessary to live a happy life. Although each personality is different, social skills are learned. Some families do not do a good job at teaching social skills so kids from those families have to find a way to learn how to be social as adults. Some can do it through force of will, like the poster above did, but others will need more help and putting oneself in the hands of a professional counselor reduces the risk of failure. Ten or twelve hours with a therapist could change your life in a very positive way. You could be social by summer time. College is an excellent time to do this. It is not too late.</p>