Need some advice on how to handle an appeal letter to return to school

Parents Forum
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<p>Hi fellow parents, a good friend told me about this site and she wasn't kidding how comprehensive it was! Wow.....anyway could use some help/advice, hopefully from someone who may have been in a similar situation.</p>

<p>My daughter, almost 20 started a prestigious university 2 years ago, she after the first semester, had a hard time, starting with depression, isolation,smoking pot sometimes, by the second semester, we saw her go downhill and were concerned, as she is not the type to seek out the counseling available. So we got her a medical leave of absence. This is nearly a year ago. Since then, she took 2 classes locally, did well in those two but nearly all her time was been spent working full time at a very good job. We did also send her to a rehab for a 28 day program to treat the "self medicating" that she was doing with the pot. She has since been seeing a therapist as well on a very regular basis. This "journey" was by no means flawless and free from any drama. There was a lot of grief, sadness, depression, anger, self hate, etc...that went along. But now almost a year later, she is in a good place, having secured a good job, and feeling better about herself. </p>

<p>We have decided together that she is ready to go back to the college she left, so there is a whole list of things she has to do which she is in the process of doing now, one component which is very important is a letter from her stating why she is ready, what has happened since she left,etc......now here is where I need your honest advice, having never gone through something like this.</p>

<p>How forthcoming should she be? Does she include the rehab part of it? She smoked pot and nothing more (not minimizing pot but it wasn't hard drugs) and sometimes the very word "rehab" can scare people into thinking something much worse. It was successful and she is doing well with it now. Does she explain why she only took two courses, because we wanted her to ease her way back and we together decided that the experience of working full time at that time was a better idea for her, for a variety of reasons. I could really use some sound advice on this situation, she is in the process of writing this appeal letter as we speak and very much wants to return. We wouldn't want her to do anything to jeopardize that of course. </p>

<p>Thank you for taking the time to read this.</p>

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<p>I work at a university, and if there has been a medical withdrawal, we primarily look to see if the student’s prior medical issue has healed or been treated so they can now be a successful student. For those students who have had several medical withdrawals (it happens more frequently than you might think) we sometimes require an affidavit from a physician stating that the student is cleared for study.</p>

<p>Real people read these (at least at my institution) so the main thing they want to see is that the student is now capable of being successful. I don’t know how much detail they need, but the fact that she completed two classes and held down a full-time job should help. Instead of “rehab” you could use more generic terms (treatment?) but I doubt it will be anything they haven’t seen before.</p>

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<p>I think that when a student took a medical leave of absence, describing the treatment of and recovery from the medical problem is essential. You can just call the rehab something like “a stay in an inpatient unit” or something like that.</p>

<p>My (limited) experience is that schools, especially highly selective schools, lean towards re-admitting any student whose recovery seems genuine.</p>

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<p>If she took a medical leave with no mention of a substance problem, I would not mention it now. I would just say she was treated for her condition and is fully recovered. I just think having these things on record can come back to bite you. Say she becomes a politician someday and a journalist gets their hand on college records.</p>

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<p>I agree that she should stress she received inpatient “treatment” followed by outpatient support/medical followup, that she has held down a full time job, that she tested the waters with 2 courses that she completed successfully and that she is ready to return. A physician or therapist could easily “certify” that she is physically able to return to school without having to report the diagnosis, which really is protected under HIPAA privacy laws.</p>

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<p>We know one “prestigious” school that does require specifics on what treatment was sought, what medications and so on, requires MD documentation, and a meeting with the head of health services. This school also sometimes required that the student be followed by a counselor, usually on campus.</p>

<p>Interestingly, this same school requires 6 months to a year of full-time work in a non-family job, and does not mention coursework at all in its letters to students who take this kind of leave.</p>

<p>Your daughter would be readmitted, I would think, without too many problems.</p>

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<p>I would also not mention substance abuse it school has no knowledge of it it. My experience with school is only need to know basis.</p>

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<p>We have decided to not mention the pot and program she attended. Hopefully what we are providing is enough and will allow her to return. There are of course no “sure things” when it comes to a situation like this and we really hope she is ready to succeed and has overcome the obstacles that put her in this position in the first place.
I thank you for your advice, seems everyone was pretty much on the same page.</p>

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<p>Just an update, she got an email yesterday stating she has been accepted back and can register for classes on Monday! What a relief…fingers crossed that those rocky roads are behind us:)</p>

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<p>Congratulations. You are probably already thinking about it, but I would make sure she has good support at her school when she goes back.</p>

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<p>Yes thats of paramount importance. We have been in touch with the counseling center and she will be working with someone over there even before she returns with input from the therapist here that shes been working with. This time, we will leave no stone unturned and make sure she has an intact support system in place.</p>

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<p>I hope you also give her a unreserved green light to go elsewhere and do other things if this dip back into this particular campus does not work out. Some places just bring out the worst in us – and if this campus/student body just happens to push all the wrong buttons, then there’s no point in suffering through 3 more years of that. Good luck!</p>

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<p>Olymom, absolutely. We have discussed this and have made it very clear that if for whatever reason, it doesn’t seem like a good fit, or is not where she feels she belongs then by all means, she can look into changing schools. I couldn’t agree more with your sentiments. She has a very different head right now ( a great thing) but I am also a realist with how certain pressures, can trigger certain behaviors, and its not to say we are out of the woods forever. I feel good however, this time around because we have a great support system in place to whom she will be accountable. We can only hope for the best.</p>

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<p>I didn’t see your original post till now - thanks for the encouraging update! Best to you and your daughter.</p>