I don’t think the OP @havanamama1959 has been back in a week? The finances , fit, logistics, etc. for this daughter still seem unclear . Are these the only options still on the table? Best of luck to the OP in figuring this out.
I guess to me that, all things being equal, social fit is critical.
It’s not whether me or D’s family is happy at a school: it’s whether D is happy. And I fully appreciate that this may change!
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Let me get this straight . . . it doesn’t matter whether parents can endlessly talk about how the students at their kid’s school are loads smarter than the students at other schools?
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This is true.
And lest I be tagged by the SuperMods for sending too many emails on this OP, I shall gracefully bow out, wishing OP/kid the very best. I only hope we’re this fortunate next year!
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Don’t think you have to worry about getting tagged. The “is it worth it” question is a very common theme on this site. Much back and forth. Often same cast of characters making the same statements. Over and over. Going extended periods of time after OP has left the scene is pretty common. Wash. Rinse. Repeat.
Ultimately I think the site would be better off without these types of discussions. Typically do not get anywhere and often end up with anger seen in recent posts. But if you did that, traffic on this site would decrease significantly. LOL
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Not angry at all. Pointing out that it’s ok to continue (ad nauseum) to remind folks who chose the pricier option that they could have invested the money (we know), bought the kid a condo (we know), or even that we are not assigning appropriate values to ROI using opportunity cost (see Eyemgh’s post above yours), or even that we don’t know what an index fund is or can’t calculate risk.
We get it.
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To me MIT and Vanderbilt seem so different that I’m surprised that the same student would be attracted to both. For a kid that has a strong STEM orientation, MIT is the clear winner - and it isn’t close. To me, it would be the definite choice if finances allow (meaning not saddling student or parent with excessive loans that will be life limiting - a modest amount of borrowing would, IMO, be worth it for MIT) AND if it will be a fit. Not every super bright student will enjoy MIT for reasons outlined above, but for the right kid it is a tremendous opportunity.
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I agree with that. There’s no indication at all that OP needs to borrow any portion of that $100k. Her D not only leans toward STEM, but potentially wants to pursue her interest in areas where the differences between MIT and Vanderbilt are even greater (than STEM generally).
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I’m not going to get into the debate about what makes the extra cost worth it or not, because it is such a personal decision based on the personality and goals of the student as well as other factors besides academic opportunities (plus finances of course). Many good points have been made about the advantages of MIT. However, I can assure the OP that a student who gets a full tuition scholarship at Vanderbilt will have no shortage of great opportunities there. My Vandy son and his roommate both secured MBB internships (two different companies) prior to the start of junior year and they have many friends on a variety of career paths who have excellent upcoming internships or post grad opportunities.
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Right – where are those jobs? Income comparisons that fail to take into account differences in the cost of living are imperfect.
Massachusetts is more expensive than Tennessee, so an MIT grad making $79k in Mass probably has the same, or even less, purchasing power than a Vandy grad making $69k in Tennessee.
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@havanamama1959 Congratulations on your child’s amazing acceptances. What a dilemma to have!
I don’t have any strong opinions, but I have hired an MIT grad. This person is brilliant but I would say this hire is a soldier and not a leader. I often think of retiring soon and despite this person being the best at the job responsibilities of all my direct reports, this person cannot communicate and hold a meeting. This person cannot make a decision with conviction. I would never place this person in front of a prospect or a client.
So, yes, MIT has amazing opportunities and has brilliant students, but does your child have the charisma to seize them? Maybe your child is not now the natural born leader, and you say an MBA is an option. Maybe Vanderbilt is a great place to let them grow. If they got into MIT undergrad, I am sure they have the ability to go there for grad school. But if your child is that natural born leader, MIT seems like the place to be.
I would consider fit and finances.
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Tone of your last two posts in this thread is significantly different. If the first post wasn’t made in anger it certainly came across that way.
There is a flipside as well. People who don’t go with the higher cost/ranked option don’t value education. They are too stupid to understand the wonderful and amazing opportunities that X school offers. They chose luxury cars and multiple fancy around-the-world trips and now kitchen remodels (apparently to be called heroes). If only they could learn from people who are so much wiser than they are, they could avoid making such dumb choices totally and irreparably messing up their kids’ lives in the process.
And without question, not everyone who picks the higher cost/ranked school thinks or posts that way. But not everyone who doesn’t thinks or posts the way you criticized.
Ultimately the smartest among us likely avoid the absurdity of the “is it worth it” threads. When I saw the title of this one I thought of someone in the class of 2017 who made this very choice (wasn’t for engineering though). Thought it might draw her back but she hasn’t been here in a year. Oh well.
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Everyone agrees that OP’s daughter should choose a college that’s her best fit. However, I struggle to find any indication that Vanderbilt is a better fit for her in OP’s posts other than the financial one. So it seems to me the decision does boil down to the tradeoff between better financial fit and better academic fit.
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I know a CC poster from 2017 who made this choice. We may or may not be talking about the same person. In any event, the decision worked out brilliantly for that student. They are thriving at a top med school, again on scholarship, and living it up with a fat bank account after having a wonderful undergraduate experience at Vandy. No regrets.
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Along with academic and financial fit, I would certainly add the importance of social fit. And location, logistics, could be another consideration for many families.
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But OP never indicated Vanderbilt would be better for her daughter socially or geographically. So why do we make assumptions for her?
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I’m not making assumptions. I don’t think it’s clear either way from the info the OP has provided, which is the better social fit, or if there are clear geographic preferences.
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Agree. Poster said the kid is driven but that doesn’t tell me the whole story. Most kids at MIT or other highly ranked schools are obviously driven.
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If OP hasn’t indicated either way which school is a better social fit or geographical fit, doesn’t it mean that OP either doesn’t have a preference or doesn’t care enough about these factors?
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Not necessarily. These are such different schools, that I am surprised the daughter doesn’t seem to have a preference. Unless she does and the OP just hasn’t decided to share that info.