<p>I make only $60K a year, but my ex-husband makes over $2m. Because of his high income, I have been told by one university where my son has been admitted, I will not receive any type of aid. I've also learned i cannot qualify for grants and scholarship money because of my ex husband's high income. </p>
<p>Sadly, my ex-husband no longer sees his son (for 1 1/2 years now) and refuses to help him at all with any college finances. </p>
<p>Are there any other parents out there with this same set of circumstances?</p>
<p>There are many sad tales like yours. </p>
<p>Your son needs to apply to colleges and universities that do not require information from the Non-Custodial Parent. It is truly unfortunate that no one told you that sooner. If there are no affordable colleges or universities on your son’s list, he may need to take a year off and choose his list more carefully when he applies for the fall of 2014.</p>
<p>You need to focus on FAFSA only schools - or if the require the CSS profile - you need to verify that they don’t need info from the Non-Custodial Parent. Actually - it can work either way. My ex basically makes nothing - but wouldn’t help out our son by filling in the NCP form - since they don’t talk anymore - so we had to eliminate all schools that require NCP information to get aid from our list. Unfortunately, FAFSA only schools don’t usually give as much aid - and leave a larger gap between EFC and the aid package they give.</p>
<p>Yes, a close friend of mine had the same issue. Her ex refused to pay anything but his high salary prevented his kids from getting need based aid from those schools that required a NCP financial supplement, mainly the PROFILE schools. Look up what schools do nt require this. Vanderbilt is one, I thought USC was, and Denison College once was that way. Most state schools require FAFSA only and your husband financials will not come into the picture at them. Look also for schools where your son’s stats are on the high end of the range so that he is considered for merit.</p>
<p>Here’s the list of CSS Profile schools, showing which of them require the profile from the noncustodial parent:
<a href=“CSS Profile – CSS Profile | College Board”>CSS Profile – CSS Profile | College Board;
<p>My sympathies to you, OP. What a putz your ex is!!! The advice is correct - you need to focus on FAFSA-only schools.</p>
<p>The putz doesn’t have to be an ex either. I know several families where the primary breadwinner refuses to pay though his income and assets are there to do so. Just flat out refuses. My neighbor wants all of his GIRLS to stay at home and commute, though he’ll pay for his son to go away. Yes, there are some still like that even in a blue state. </p>
<p>One well known man about town refused to pay for his DD to go to Yale. Didn’t want to pay for it since she got a full ride scholarship locally and had med school aspirations. And that 's what she did. She went to the local state school, excelled and went to medicall school thereafter. But none of these are exes, though they almost were turned into them, so sharply divided the family was over this.</p>
<p>It’s not the not-paying-for-school that gets me … it’s the not-seeing-his-son-for-a-year-and-a-half that is so sad.</p>
<p>That it is, Kelsmom. That it is. </p>
<p>Going back to those who won’t pay for college, I want to add that we get posts here all of the time from kids whose parents, intact marriages, who make too much money for the kid to get any or much financial aid and they won’t or can’t pay. So, the category of an ex who won’t pay is just one of many.</p>
<p>Did your son apply to any schools that gave him large merit and/or don’t use NCP info?</p>
<p>I know that this is upsetting, but why would you think that colleges that ask for NCP info would ignore his huge income? If “not paying” were a reason for a college to give aid, then all parents would say that they’re not paying. </p>
<p>It’s not reasonable to expect such schools to ignore a $2 million dollar income. Yikes!</p>
<p>If your son didn’t apply to schools where his stats would get large merit scholarships or aid would be based on your income alone, then he may need to take a gap year and reapply.</p>
<p>Is your son a NMF?</p>
<p>Out of curiousity, since your ex makes so much money, how much was he ordered to pay for child support and spousal support? It would seem odd if there hadn’t been a high support order. Also, when you divorced, didn’t your lawyer advise you to get an order for college support? It would seem that with that income, your lawyer would have asked for the moon to ensure that your child(ren) get to have a better lifestyle based on their dad’s income.</p>
<p>*I’ve also learned i cannot qualify for grants and scholarship money because of my ex husband’s high income. *</p>
<p>Scholarship money is usually based on stats, not need. Grants are based on need. Your son should qualify for scholarships from the schools that award them for stats.</p>
<p>Tell us more…what are your son’s stats …GPA and SAT (include SAT breakdown). What is his major/career interests?</p>
<p>A bit off point, but is child support being calculated on the father’s income of 2million a year? If not, I’d talk to a family law attorney about it. Maybe it’s not too late? GL</p>
<p>^^^</p>
<p>Right. With that kind of income, if the parents were married for a decent amount of time you’d think that there would have been a substantial order of spousal support. And, because of that income a very high order of child support. I can’t imagine a dad earning that much who wouldn’t be ordered to pay at least $48k per year for child support.</p>
<p>Since there are some stories here, I will say something that will not be popular.
Sometimes the spouse going through the divorce makes things so bitter that it drives away the “breadwinner” parent out of the kid’s life. That’s right, divorce situations are very charged situations and for a parent to be out of the life of a kid, a major bitter episode must have happened. IMHO no parent unilaterally wants to severely cut ties with their offspring without a cause.</p>
<p>. IMHO no parent unilaterally wants to severely cut ties with their offspring without a cause.</p>
<p>That’s true of healthy parents. I’ve seen well-heeled NCPs who have personality disorders cut children out of their lives. Keep in mind that people with PDs don’t love/bond like normal folks do. I’m not saying that the OP’s ex has a PD. We have no idea. Just saying that while none of us can imagine a situation where we’d cut ties with a beloved child, there are sick people out there that can do this…and they do. </p>
<p>A mentally healthy parent who loves their child won’t cut contact with said child no matter how nutty/odd/crazy/mean the CP is. And, frankly, if the CP parent is such and the NCP has so much money, then he certainly can legally fight for more ordered custody and arrange exchanges without having to see the CP hardly at all.</p>
<p>Just to reiterate what’s been said above:</p>
<p>It may be necessary for your son to take next year off - no college or college classes AT ALL!!! - and do college applications again.</p>
<p>This time around, focus on schools where he’d be eligible for significant merit aid (which could potentially cover ALL his expenses) and/or schools that don’t require noncustodial parent info. You can start by looking at these schools for generous merit awards:</p>
<p><a href=“http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/financial-aid-scholarships/1348012-automatic-full-tuition-full-ride-scholarships.html[/url]”>http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/financial-aid-scholarships/1348012-automatic-full-tuition-full-ride-scholarships.html</a>
<a href=“Competitive Full Tuition / Full Ride Scholarships - Financial Aid and Scholarships - College Confidential Forums”>Competitive Full Tuition / Full Ride Scholarships - Financial Aid and Scholarships - College Confidential Forums;
<p>Your son may want to work on improving his SAT or ACT score, to make himself more eligible for merit awards. Other than that, he should make the best use he can of next year - perhaps a job? Maybe volunteer work?</p>
<p>Just be aware that taking ANY college classes at all after graduating from high school will make these merit awards disappear - they are only for students who have not yet started college.</p>
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<p>I have encountered certain scholarships that put lower income students at a priority. She may be referring to those?</p>
<p>Don’t lose hope OP! There may be a silver lining. My friend was recently admitted to her top choice school(an Ivy) and she lives with one parent and is not in contact with the other for multiple reasons. The parent she is no longer in contact with refused to fill out the NCP so she was told that she had to get a letter from a third party observer( school counselor, etc) that would explain why the NPC cannot be filled out. I’m not sure jf your ex will fill out the NpC but it doesn’t sound like it since he hasn’t seen your son in over a year. Give it a try. Good luck!</p>
<p>I’m in the club. Her dad and I split when I was pregnant. He is a 747 captain and I am a public school teacher. I lost much sleep over this, thinking maybe…I even wrote it into my additional comments section on the aid apps. Fears were realized - to some extent. No aid offered at the big schools she got into (thankfully rejected by Princeton and Harvard - would have been more painful to be unable to pay those). She and I escaped disaster, however, when she got offered two full merit scholarships and outstanding schools. Now she just has to pick one by Friday. Ouch. I see a clear winner, but she doesn’t - yet. Oh, and dad still sees her occasionally. Don’t know if that’s better or worse. He says he paid all that child support for years and I needed to save it to pay for college.</p>
<p>There are many reasons that parents cut off contact with their children in divorce situation, but there is also the heel who truly does not want to be bothered in that group Sometimes it is not a bad thing either. I’ve known families who walk on egg shells when the ex comes into their lives. My friend’s DD has an ex that is outright dangerous who hangs around dangerous people and whose family is as crazy as all get out. Not a safe situation for children or anyone. </p>
<p>Sometimes, too, the separation is done because the Solomon principle when a parent feels it is causing more turmoil to be involved than not, and steps away.</p>