<p>I've been in college for 1 year now and I still have no friends. I feel like I'm missing out, why can't I be normal? What am I doing wrong here??</p>
<p>Trying too hard, just take it easy and live your life. Friends will come to you through your everyday activities.</p>
<p>P.S. If your only activity is playing video games in your dorm/house (or anything of the like) you do not apply to this statement.</p>
<p>To the OP- I can relate to you so much. I’m a freshman in college, and I have no friends and feel lonely and depressed everyday. I know I’m very emotionally unstable right now because of some situations at home and at school. However, I don’t want to miss out on the college experience and I want to meet new people. yet, my conversations always sound forced or awkward and people don’t seem to recognize me. I feel like I need to be good at something like sports or music, but I’m not good at anything and that makes me even more depressed.
BUt maybe blaming ourselves and moping around is not what we should be doing, even though it’s extremely hard (at least for me) not to. A great man is judged not by how little falls he makes, but how he picks himself up once he does fall. Maybe the first step to making friends is not a self-blaming attitude but a smile to the people we meet and not being discouraged but hopeful that in time, friends will come. Hope this helps.</p>
<p>lol… why don’t you just talk to some people? Go out; socialise… it’s not like you’re a completely unlikable person. You can always find someone you get on with and with whom you share some interests with, no matter how esoteric yours are.</p>
<p>Go out where? I don’t understand this attitude</p>
<p>You’re a freshman. If you live in a dorm, get up go to the lounge area and study/bring a laptop, but don’t wear headphones. Start conversations with other people that come in. If you’re there the same time everyday, and you slowly converse more and more with the same people. Similar interests+overlapping locations=friendship.</p>
<p>Another option is joining some kind of professional frat (No offense but if you posted the question a social frat won’t work out unless you’re legacy)
you will recreate the beginning of the year feel of no one knowing anyone, and from there start conversations.</p>
<p>Just curious - do you really not know what it means to “go out?” If you don’t put yourself out there socially, you’re going to have a hard time making friends. I agree with the notion of sitting in the lounge to talk to people. You could also join IM sports, for example, or clubs. Make an appearance at frat or open theme parties (if you have those - although even if you don’t have frats there are still probably open social events. Put yourself out there, and try to meet people.</p>
<p>no offense, but i don’t understand how some people can’t make any friends at all. i mean there is at least one person bound to like you…</p>
<p>There has to be at least one club or society on campus that interests you. Failing that, try go to the schools theatre (if it has one) and mill around, talking to people during intermission.<br>
I couldn’t find people I liked at school so I did the theatre thing. Ended up meeting a lot of interesting people with the same interests.</p>
<p>This is interesting because I was in your predicament last semester and earlier this semester(hence my name), but things have gotten better. Here’s why:</p>
<p>I focus on my experience here as opposed to “making friends.” Sorry to break it to you, but 5-10 years down the road after you graduate college the number of people you’ve met or considered “friends” won’t even be in contact with you. If you’re lucky, you’ll probably have 3-5 really good friends worth keeping in touch with past college. </p>
<p>Life moves in chapters and people get left behind. There are going to be a select few who stay by your side as life goes on and that just goes to show you who’s your true friend. </p>
<p>I understand that making friends could be really hard (I was there) but you just have to be strong and don’t give up on college as a whole. College, in general, has so many great opportunities to do cool things. There are college events, volunteer events, study abroad opportunities, domestic travel, extracurriculars, and so much more. Do things that interest you and try to go outside of the box. For instance, I didn’t volunteer at all this academic year but next year I’m going outside of my comfort zone and going to volunteer every month (it’s in conjuction with my school). Just focus on the amazing things your school has. If you make friends, great. If you don’t, great. You have the rest of your life to make friends. It’s not the end of the world if you don’t make friends in college. Life doesn’t end after college.</p>
<p>If you care, you could archive my posts and see that I was miserable, aggravated with not finding friends, and so much more. Now, I just don’t care. I’m not focusing on making friends, I’m going to focus on taking advantage of the great things my school offer. I’m blessed enough to have a solid group of friends and a lovely family back home. </p>
<p>Oh yeah, also just live day by day. I was hell bent last semester on getting a single. One day I was walking to dinner and this guy came up to me and said “Hey, I like your shoes.” We had dinner and now next year we’re going to be living together. Basically, we’re on the road to becoming friends. I would have never thought (in terms of my first semester) that I would be living with someone next year and now look. </p>
<p>Just live man. I don’t know if I helped answer your questions but just don’t focus on making friends. Get out there, experience and take advantage of all the great opportunities your college will have. You never know who you’ll meet.</p>
<p>To the rest of you, it’s easy for you all to make judgements and make accusations because it’s not you. You all have friends so it’s easy for you to sit back “zomggggg how u not making fr3nds it’s so 3asyyyyy!” Sorry, but college nowadays everyone is so cliquey. Everyone wants to have their heads up their friends as.s. and don’t want to venture out and meet others. It’s so sad at my college. I see the same people together all the time. </p>
<p>It’s frustrating trying to be nice and get to know people but basically shunned off because they already have their “crew.” Thank God the people I’m becoming friends with aren’t like this. </p>
<p>But I do agree with the whole staying in your room thing. You can’t expect nothing to change if all you do is ‘wake up-class-room-dinner-room-repeat’. You do have to put your face out there and get involved. Your potential friends can’t become friends with you if all you do is stay locked in your room.</p>
<p>Edit: Look at the bright side. 1 year down, 3 to go.</p>
<p>join clubs/social lounges by yourself. have you not met any people on your floor?</p>
<p>Talk to people, shoot the breeze, go grab some food with people…I find these are good ways to start friendships/relationships with other people.</p>
<p>I second everything sad says. Especially on the friends part. Just focus on the experience as opposed to making friends. It eliminates unnecessary stress.</p>
<p>Try to picture yourself as others do. Do you avoid eye contact? It’s hard to talk to someone who won’t look you in the eye.</p>
<p>Do you ever smile? Sometimes people don’t know that their body language says “unapproachable.” </p>
<p>Look around at others. Who are the people that look approachable? Look specifically at what they’re doing or what they’re saying.</p>