I come from a pretty wealthy family and I go to a difficult private high school and all my grades are C’s or below with the exception of a few B’s. Sometimes I just can’t get myself to study or do homework. Even when I try I still fail. Before i went to this high school I went to a fairly easy public school and i excelled in just about every discipline, I took all honors or enriched classes and I was just a good student overall. Then my parents my family moved and made me go to a small private school where I did horrible. Although I adapted quickly and made a lot of friends I just couldn’t keep my grades up. It’s as if I don’t care about anything really anymore, before I had a few “friends with benefits” type of relationships when I started going to this high school but now I don’t even care about having any relationship like that anymore. I still care about all of my friends and getting drunk and high with them though. My parents are trying to motivate me to get good grades but it just doesn’t seem to work, everything I want they just but for me like a luxury car or the latest iPhone or MacBooks or any of that stuff. I also am trying to force myself to get good grades but it just seems impossible. I just want to be able to know what I can do to motivate myself to get good grades. Everyone in my family has gotten straight A’s except for me unfortunatley. I have considered going drug free and being sober but all of my friends who also participate in getting drunk and high have straight A’s so there’s really no point in doing so, also when I was in my freshman first quarter I didn’t do any of that and I still had horrible grades. I am really worried about my future and college and the SAT/ACT and it seems as if there’s nothing I can do. Any advice on how I could bring my grades up would help.
well, the alcohol and drugs aren’t helping your situation but it sounds like you are depressed. Have you thought about seeing someone for support?
I don’t feel that depressed though. My mom is depressed because she has severe chronic pain and what I feel
Is hopelessness not sadness. I am still able to enjoy being with my friends and what not.
Have your parents take you a drug counseling center and a psychologist. Otherwise you will have a wasted life if you survive.
@bobbolis The hopelessness part sounds like depression to me. Tell your parents you need to see a therapist. Common misconception is that being depressed just means that you are sad. Your lack of motivation, apathy towards your wellbeing, and reliance on drugs/alcohol are major red flags. Get help.
I’m not one to judge, but maybe you should look into family counseling too? Your parents buying you gadgets and cars as a parenting tool appears to be replacing physical and open communication.
First rule of thumb: take care of yourself. You are attempting to do that by reaching out to this forum.
Probably trying to solve the dynamics of your family by yourself is going to be too ambitious. Start with just taking care of you. The good news is that in family systems, if one person changes their role, the others tend to also change in response.
Do as the others have suggested here and get help for yourself. Join Alateen or a similar support group. Ask your parents to help you get a counselor to help you with other issues, but your main goals should be 1) get alcohol and drug free; 2) pass high school and don’t worry about your grades and stress; 3) understand that even with Cs you can start college somewhere and/or you can attend community college to raise your grades later; 4) see if you can find a way to take time off before college, but not live at home. There’s Student Conservation Association; there’s Americorps. The point is to get yourself out of your family dynamic and into a place that’s drug and alcohol free. Colleges have both and I think it may be helpful for you to find a place to go to practice your clean and sober skills before going to college.
Take care of yourself! Try to see a licensed therapist. It will take time to turn things around but if you put the time in you can do it successfully!! I DO NOT recommended talking to a high school counselor about your issues they don’t know anything about an issue someone is going through even when they try to BS their understanding they are dumb.