<p>
Miss Manners (the real one) emphasizes that manners are all essentially “just because”–they are rules that help society function smoothly. Many of them are arbitrary by nature.</p>
<p>
</p>
<p>Wouldn’t you be saying something along the lines of “thank you for taking the time to meet with me” or “thank you for your consideration,” etc. in your “business follow-up?”</p>
<p>Yes to thank you’s. Yes, email is ok.
But what about those schools that contact the students directly & have them all show up to one place with multiple interviewers? Happens in big cities. The students don’t know the interviewers’ names ahead of time and don’t get contact info. What tk do then?</p>
<p>I had a job interview on Friday. I sent a short email to the person who conducted the interview, thanking them for taking the TWO HOURS they spent during my interview, and saying I looked forward to hearing from them if an opportunity for employment came along. I received a very nice response all of five minutes later thanking me with some additional information about employment with them. </p>
<p>It took me all of a minute to type that email. Well worth my time.</p>
<p>A thank you doesn’t have to come ‘from the heart’ or risk being fake and manipulative. It’s common courtesy. It’s acknowledging that someone took time out for you, or did something for you, regardless of the reason. Just like when the Starbucks barista hands you your coffee: you say thank you. It’s pleasant.</p>
<p>I feel bad for kids who think that common courtesy would somehow be viewed in a sinister light. If the interviewer said ‘please don’t contact me again’, that’s different.</p>
<p>As an alumni interviewer for my college and a parent of two recent high school seniors, I agree that it is appropriate and simple courtesy for the students to send a follow-up thank you e-mail. I also have been surprised to get just one thank you from 8 interviewees. These days, the initial contact is usually arranged by e-mail–so the students have that. And honestly, it’s a nuisance to meet the kids at their schools or in a coffee shop, which is where most of these interviews need to be conducted these days, and then write something up. Obviously not sending a thank you won’t affect the application–but why not thank someone for taking the time and effort to meet with them?</p>
<p>I sent a thank you email to my cornell interviewer after the interview. She emailed me back saying thanks for the interview and meeting and wishing me luck. </p>
<p>But anyway, those students gave genuine thank you’s and appreciation at the end of the interview instead of just saying “Thanks, bye.” Do you not appreciate that as much as getting a thank you in an email?</p>
<p>“But anyway, those students gave genuine thank you’s and appreciation at the end of the interview instead of just saying “Thanks, bye.” Do you not appreciate that as much as getting a thank you in an email?”</p>
<p>I would say thank you in person, as well (and my son has been taught to do this). I think it’s just an extra, courteous step to send a thanks in font. More formal maybe? …and I can’t believe I’m saying that about email thanks yous…but times are changing.</p>
<p>I was raised to send a written thank you for any gift, interview, or just if someone did something nice. It seems different today. I’m not ancient…</p>
<p>I understand there is less handwriting going on today, but it seems so easy to send an email thanks that I don’t see why someone wouldn’t do it unless they were specifically told not to.</p>
<p>I conducted five interviews last weekend for my university (one of CC’s “top universities”) - I didn’t know any of the students previously (the daughter of a good friend came in after I left; I would have never conducted that interview; not right IMHO).</p>
<p>Only one of the five asked for my email address and she promptly emailed me that night to thank me and reiterate that this college was her top choice. I thought that was totally appropriate. Very surprised that none of the others did that.</p>
<p>FYI - This was a day organized through the alumni admissions council - all interviews happened at a local middle school - they were not set up personally. I still think it’s appropriate to send a follow up email thank-you.</p>
<p>BTW - I made sure that my DS sent follow-up emails to the adcoms he met at a COLLEGE FAIR last fall for the colleges he is interested in (he’s only a junior). You should never miss an opportunity to make a positive impression. Besides, it’s the right thing to do.</p>
<p>My kids attended a private school their entire lives. When they were in lower school their teacher taught the kids how to write a proper thank you note. Taught me a thing or two. Did you know you aren’t supposed to start a thank you note with the words “thank you”? </p>
<p>My daughter to this day writes the best thank you notes. </p>
<p>After my sons interview with his top choice school he emailed a thank you, had a follow up question, reiterated his desire for the school. The adcom emailed back, answered the question, and lo and behold was his first reader. He did get in. Did the note have any impact? No idea, but it did fit with the rest of his “package” as a nicely mannered, honest, appreciative boy.</p>
<p>
</p>
<p>
</p>
<p>Yes, that’s a good point, but I guess I still wouldn’t consider it a thank-you note, but rather a way to advance my own interests. Which actually, I’m wondering whether some of the “thank you’s” I’m hearing about here aren’t really.</p>
<p>In the office where I work, probably 80 percent of our business correspondence begins with the words, “Thank you for…” your recent letter, your concern etc., our recent meeting, whatever. But they’re not thank you letters.</p>
<p>I’m not arguing against the importance of thank you letters.</p>
<p>I have another suggestion for students–when you’ve been accepted and decided to attend a college, send another thank-you note to the interviewer then. He or she will really appreciate that, because you are no longer just trying to create a good impression.</p>
<p>My kids have sent thank you notes since they could draw … then write. It’s a common courtesy to say thank you for a gift, a recommendation letter, an interview. It takes time to interview a student, a job candidate, etc. Saying thank you is polite. Email has become more acceptable and when possible we use the good old-fashioned snail mail.</p>
<p>Sometimes I am appreciative for this site as much as I have begun to grow out of it, because there are so many things I learn that have nothing to do with college admissions. </p>
<p>Back when I graduated high school, it would have never occurred to me to send a thank-you note for a gift. Not because I wasn’t very grateful that it was given, but because that was never an expectation nor did I ever even see someone in my family receive one. Of course, thanks would be given at the time of the gift and what have you, or followed up with a phone call, but if I hadn’t been on CC I would’ve never known that sending notes was the thing to do. </p>
<p>Same situation now that I am graduating college. It would’ve never occurred to me to send an email thanking an interviewer, or to offer more than verbal thanks to those who wrote my letters of recommendation (which I didn’t do back in high school, either, because I didn’t know to). I’m generally considered to be very well-mannered (which I have been told by teachers and professors), but a lot of it comes down to how you are raised. Like I said, it wouldn’t even have occurred to me to do these things if I hadn’t read about them here. So, maybe in a more positive note, at least some of these kids are just completely unaware of these norms, and not just being thankless.</p>
<p>Nicely said hyperJulie - and I can tell you, I normally receive thank you’s when I interview someone for a job. So put that next on your list!</p>
<p>My S received a written thank you note from his admissions officer interviewer. I found that sort of odd. Cool, but kind of reversed.</p>
<p>He made brownies for his teacher and counselors who did his letters of rec…AFTER they’d submitted them,so they wouldn’t think he was trying to influence their letters.</p>
<p>I am another of those that feels “from the heart” is not necessary for a courtesy.
I think of wedding gifts- what if Aunt Sally sent a gift the couple weren’t fond of? Do they send thank yous to all but Aunt Sally because it wouldn’t be from the heart?
Or, if aging grandma send a check as a birthday gift in the mail, do we disregard the gift if the amount is less than we wanted, because a thank you for such a small gift wouldn’t be from the heart?
Thank yous aren’t a rule, such as pay a server for coffee, but saying thank you is a courtesy most do when served.
Theoretically, some here would say never thank a job interviewer. Why? Because they aren’t doing the interviewee a favor; they are doing the job they are paid to do. Perhaps in theory thanks should only be for those going above what is required, but in the real world we say thanks far more often.</p>
<p>^But unlike in a college interview situation, when you send out a “thank you” for a gift you have received you do not need to worry that the recipient might think you are trying to gain some sort of advantage from the situation with your note.</p>
<p>My kids wrote thank you notes for individual interviews, but assumed that the in-school group meetings were marketing by the school, and not evaluative. I don’t think they wrote thank-yous for any of them.</p>
<p>Buy your kid a box of notecards. Send a hand-written thank you note. Make a reference to something you and the interviewer discussed during the interview. Keep the note brief, but be warm. An e-mailed thank you is not that impressive.</p>