<p>I will get right to the point: I am NOT happy at all right now at college and its really getting to me. I know it is still very very early in the game, but i honestly do not feel happy and feel like i wont anytime soon. </p>
<p>My situation is not anything special. I have been out there making friends, hanging out with people, joining clubs, and doing my homework and studying. However i seriously feel like something is missing and I have been wishing I stayed home more than ever these last few weeks. I guess it is homesickness, but I feel its not only that or its more than that. The first few weeks i was here I barely got homesick, after the first time I went home, Thats when it really hit. Also, Because of the financial convience, I live off campus, and im also slightly regretting that now, typical. But that is my own fault. I moved in with my bestfriend, but I dont even see here much anymore. She is always in her room studying (Not saying thats bad) but I dont know, our friendship is not how it used to be. Everyone says not to move in with your bestfriend, now I know why. I just feel like I cant rely on her, and it would be nice to have her support sometimes. </p>
<p>Sorry for the whole life story, but Im honestly regretting coming here in the first place and Want to leave and go to a cheaper college by my house. I feel like a complete idiot and probably sound liike a complete baby, but some advice would be nice. </p>
<p>Try moving on campus maybe, if you like all of the other aspects of your school? If you don’t think that’ll help, then do as you suggest and go to a college back home. By the way, there’s absolutely no reason to feel ashamed of or embarassed by the way you’re feeling. You can’t help it, if you could, then you surely would. The way you can help it is to do what’ll make you happy, which you seem to have identified already, so go for it(:</p>
<p>yeah i just didnt expect this at all I just regret everything right now. I wish I never came now and it is just a crappy feeling. I just expected a little different, I dont know. I jusy feel so stupid for coming here and making this decision now, but i dont want to be here and be unhappy and ultimately waste my parents money when i know ill be happier at home. </p>
<p>But thanks for the advice, it really helped :)</p>
<p>Eventually, even if you go home, you will one day have to leave home anyway, either for graduate school, or for a job. Or maybe your spouse will take you far away.</p>
<p>oh i am definitely not dropping out, i would go to school back at home where it is cheaper. What i should have mentioned earlier, is another reason for my choice to possibly leave is my college is pricey. I was having doubts about going back in the summer because of the money, but my parents still said i should go. But it took coming here for me to realize that i should have stayed closer to home for at least the first year, but that is my own fault. </p>
<p>And Its not that I have a problem leaving home, believe me Im not planning to live at home forever, I just realized (a little late) that this was not a good time to leave. </p>
<p>But like I said, I am NOT dropping out, just considering continuing my education elsewhere…</p>
<p>I made the same mistake my first year. I was roommates with my best friend from HS. I found a great group of friends despite my bad situation, and ENJOYED myself. Make the most of your situation and try to get through this year. Live on campus next year if you can, or move into some type of housing that will help you build closer relationships (i.e a language house, substance free, etc.). The best thing you can do right now is work really hard to get as good of grades as possible. If you then still feel like transfering, then you will have better options for yourself with those stellar grades :).</p>
<p>Umm, she was still going to transfer to a college back home, bugsoccer. EDIT: As she just told you haha. </p>
<p>And floridadad, not to pick nits, but… Her spouse wouldn’t “take her” somewhere far away. Marriage is a partnership. Partners are equal and make decisions together. What you describe is more like kidnapping, well, how you state it, at least.
Now, even if she does need to learn to deal with being a significant distance from her parents, the OP will have an opportunity to do so later, if she wishes, but as for now, college is quite important, so whatever will help her perform best, and enjoy her life, is what’s truly best for her. This seems to be what she suggests… And back to the other point, who’s to say she doesn’t plan to live her life in her original community. I think it’s more a separation from her old life, and familarity that she’s missing, moreso than merely missing her parents. If she ended up living her life out in the same community as her parents, I can almost assure you she wouldn’t feel how she does…</p>
<p>EliKresses: Thanks You really give good advice. And i do miss the familarity of home to be honest. And I have been doing well in my school work since starting college, but I feel as if i would do even bette if i were to stay home. I am starting to have a lot of stresses right now from other things that are not really working out here right now. And I know that stress is a part of life and all that and i need to deal with it, but i just want ti do whats best for my wellbeing. I dont want to feel down all the time. </p>
<p>jkiwmom: I am definitely trying to do as well as i can with my school work and I guess i should be thankful that I have found a group of good friends and i am trying my hardest to make the most out of it. I just feel as though something is missing right now and maybe i wasnt ready to go away as i thought i was.</p>
<p>To be perfectly frank, it sounds like you are just homesick. Everything else you describe seems to be either focused around that or extremely vague (i.e. “I just feel as though something is missing right now”). Maybe I’m reading into it too much, but even issue with your financial situation seems to be brought up just to reaffirm your belief that you should be home, and your parents don’t seem to share the same concern for finances. You are overwhelmed from moving away from home, and that’s understandable! It’s a big change and it all happens at once, making the transition very difficult. Going home probably made you miss your friends and family and the familiarity of the community you have lived in for quite a while. That’s all perfectly normal.</p>
<p>However, it’s unlikely that such a transition will be any easier later on if you have no prior experience with the unfamiliarity of being away from home for any real period of time. I completely understand what you are going through: I was ecstatic when I first got to college, which is 3100 miles from home (Tampa, FL to Portland, OR), but went through a period where I was really unhappy and was actually considering transferring to a different LAC in Florida. I’m really glad that I didn’t, though. Branching out will help you mature in so many different ways and will give you the opportunity to see and experience a lot of new things you wouldn’t if you were to stay near home. You’re only a few weeks into the school year, that thing that seems to be missing will go away with time.</p>
<p>In short: the transition is very nerve-racking, but I’m sure you will have a positive experience if you stick it out.</p>
<p>zchryevns: I actually completely agree with you, and i am definitely trying to branch out as much as i can in clubs and schoo activites. Im just gonna see how this semester goes and go from there. :)</p>
<p>no need to worry…enjoy the college life…it is one time in life and after the long years we can remember those golden moments of our college life and friends with silent tears…:)</p>
<p>All I can stay is stick with it because it’s probably not as bad as it seems. College is hard work but succeeding in life is even harder work. I suggest that maybe you take a relaxing weekend off and do something fun for your self. Good Luck</p>
<p>OP,
I’m glad you are doing all the things it takes to succeed in your present situation. When you are feeling homesick–as it seems you are a bit__ sometimes it helps to realize that “home” isn’t the “same” any more either. Your house and your bedroom and your parents maybe are the same…but the other parameters of your life will have changed significantly.</p>
<p>You won’t have the same familiar rhythm of life that you had in high school, the same schedule, the same friends or teachers. Your group of high school friends is not going to be at the football game on Friday night or go to the mall with you on Saturday afternoon, because for the most part they are now all away at their schools.</p>
<p>Could your family come visit you on campus for a weekend, or even a day? That might help…</p>
<p>Also, get yourself a Skype account. This will enable you to connect with your family and friends a lot easier and it will kinda relieve the homesickness. It has worked for me so far throughout my first weeks at college and it helps to stay in touch with all the people you knew in high school.</p>
<p>If you really feel like home would be better, can you start the transfer paperwork? Maybe doing that will start easing your anxiety. Lots of students change their mind (or don’t)…do whatever you feel is right for you. Just remember that even if you go home, it won’t be exactly the same. Friends will be gone, you’ll be in college, etc. Also remember if you go home that although you may have been on your own for a year, your parents might still treat you like you’re in high school.</p>
I just regret everything right now. I wish I never came now and it is just a crappy feeling. I just expected a little different, I dont know. I jusy feel so stupid for coming here and making this decision now, but i dont want to be here and be unhappy and ultimately waste my parents money when i know ill be happier at home. </p>
You really give good advice. And i do miss the familarity of home to be honest. And I have been doing well in my school work since starting college, but I feel as if i would do even bette if i were to stay home. I am starting to have a lot of stresses right now from other things that are not really working out here right now. And I know that stress is a part of life and all that and i need to deal with it, but i just want ti do whats best for my wellbeing. I dont want to feel down all the time. </p>