<p>ah, that’s a mixed blessing–they may get sucked in & spend much more time here than they anticipated, as many of us have ended up doing. it is a good place to connect with others tho.</p>
<p>Let him know you are there for him…but dont hover</p>
<p>I’m going into my senior year of college and all of this advice is great .. but it all revolves around one thing (that my mom said so eloquently the other day, as we discussed how excited I get while packing , compared to 3 years ago when i was nervously packing and holding back tears)…</p>
<p>As parents, you spend the first 18 years of your life nurturing, teaching, worrying and loving your children. But, as they go off to college, they are finally nurturing, teaching, worry and loving for themselves. Your role for the past 18 years is no longer in the forefront, but is still needed from time to time.</p>
<p>This is so true. When I went to college, I was scared, but ready to be on my own. There were plenty of times I handled situations on my own when I would have normally gone to my parents for advice. BUT, there were times that I called my mom crying because of a bad exam grade, or called my dad panicking for advice on what to do with a flat tire (haha). My parents were more than happy to nurture, teach, worry and love at those points when I needed them most. </p>
<p>As hard as it is to adjust (my mom said the first two weeks she had to stop herself from calling me 8x a day), the way my parents handled their baby girl going to off to college made my college experience that much better.</p>
<p>Good luck to all of you sending your kids off to school, and if this is your only child, or last one, ENJOY THE EMPTY NEST! :)</p>
<p>“8x a day” Hahaha my D is going to be a senior this year and I do believe 8x a day was pretty close to my impulses too. The best was when she called me. Whenever I broke down and called, the conversations were never as fun as when she called me.<br>
H loved when she called for daddy help, like when she was learning to drive a clutch and was stuck on a hill!
It is really hard to let go, but babogal says it well. Be confident that you have given them the tools to be independent, but be there when they need a little remote assistance!
Good luck and know you are not alone!</p>
<p>When D was away at a pre-college program I used to send her weird little postcards with cryptic messages. She’s the kind of person who really likes stuff like that, and she really looked forward to them. I’d also send her little boxes with beach pebbles and small stories from the newspaper – a paragraph or so – and a Starbucks card, for example. I guess my point is to send the unique little things that you know will appeal to your kid. The care-packages don’t have to be big and they don’t have to have cookies!</p>
<p>One time when I was in college, my mom sent me cookies and when the cardboard box had arrived, there was a mouse hole gnawed through the corner of the box. (If you send cookies, wrap them in many layers of plastic to try to disguise the yummy smell.)</p>
<p>The only thing I can say is don’t expect the phone to be a problem: Who calls who or how often. It just hasn’t been a problem for us. People post when they are upset so I think the message here is somewhat skewed. I’m not a needy parent and she’s not a clingy daughter and that is way too much negativity to read into most parent-child phone communications. Don’t worry about what other people’s “rules” and expectations are. If it’s not broke, don’t fix it.</p>
<p>I agree with those who say let them go. If you did your job, they will be fine.</p>
<p>As a parent you have one thing that your student cannot get from anyone else: parental love. Don’t abuse it, missuse it or barter with it. Freshmen struggle (in the vast number of cases), parental love is not the same as being the Rescue Ranger.</p>
<p>I too believe: LET GO. Then you get your graduate exam when they are three states away driving to a ski resort where an avalanche just killed a guest and you have to calm yourself with a mere “be aware, be careful, I love you.”</p>