<p>Our S will be going out of state for college and I wondered how long most parents stay to help get their S or D moved in? They have a "week of welcome" for the students and I have no clue what is the "norm" as far how long parents hang around. He will be going to Oregon where there's no sales tax so we figure we will buy all his linens, etc. when we get there. Trying to make reservations now for air & hotel so appreciate any insight.</p>
<p>I was thinking I'll stay for two nights when I move my D in during August, but we do also have a four-day orientation for her and a concurrent one-day family orientatoin during July.</p>
<p>LOL we got there a day early and bought all the little stuff and had dinner together. Next morning we helped move his stuff into the dorm and had lunch with him. We left after that and he was ready for us to leave. It was his time to start a new page and settle in without us there, We could tell he wanted us to go and let him find his way.</p>
<p>Three days. Three hours to kid move in. And the remainder time without kid: Twelve hours to hit the outlet stores, computer stores, and malls. Twelve hours to see the sights. Nine hours to make peace with son and negotiate terms of endearment.</p>
<p>Just like drizzit: we drove up the day before, moved D in the following morning, had lunch and left after attending a welcoming event. That night events were planned for the students only; it was a subtle hint to the parents to leave. If you're coming from far away, however, two nights makes sense.</p>
<p>We are driving 2 days to take freshman S. Will arrive on Sat. afternoon, spend Sat-Sun. shopping. Move in is Mon. a.m. with a variety of activities (ID check in, IT set up, welcome picnic). Good bye time is 4 and we will leave immediately after.</p>
<p>We only stayed the day we arrived and one more with our son when we helped him move in and picked up a couple items. He left on an orientation trip so it didn't make any sense for us to stay longer and the "welcome" events were after his trip anyway.</p>
<p>If you really need to do a lot of shopping, then I would go 2 days earlier. Otherwise, just one.</p>
<p>H, D, and I drove to Columbus and stayed in a hotel and did a little shopping. After breakfast the next morning, we moved her stuff in. We unpacked some stuff and then the three of us went textbook shopping and out to lunch. After one last post-lunch Target run, we said good-bye in the dorm parking lot and drove away.</p>
<p>OSU has an amazing move-in system and D was arriving early to be one of those helpers.</p>
<p>Great Tip: I took a bunch of pictures and put them together in an email when we returned. It helped family and friends to visualize her there. They included the dorm from a distance, the view from her dorm window, her room as it looked before we started moving stuff in, her room (with D sitting on the bed) after it was all made up, D sitting at her desk typing on her laptop, and finally waving good-bye in the parking lot.</p>
<p>Several people told me it brought tears to their eyes.</p>
<p>Have you been able to see the school's Orientation calendar? Some of them have Parent Activities, Family Activities and a sort of Designated Say Good-Bye time.</p>
<p>The activities are usually quite optional, pick and choose, but it gives you another idea of how you might schedule your visit.</p>
<p>My opinion: stay in the area however long you like (if it has other things you'd like to do), but don't expect to spend more than 2-3 hours shopping, 1-3 hours moving kid in, and one dinner and/or next day brunch or breakfast with kid.</p>
<p>Leave kid on own other than that to meet others and start his new life.</p>
<p>My neighbor's s is at a school on the other side of the country. Her husband drove their son which took two long hard days. On the way he got called to an emergency meeting at work (he's a partner in a large law firm here) so he unloaded the car at college, gave his s a quick hug goodbye, and high-tailed it back home for the meeting. Sigh just a consequence of going to school far away from home :)</p>
<p>We're arriving Friday PM, shopping Saturday with move-in on Sunday. Kids then have a few days of activities before classes start (parent sessions are during formal orientation in June). We plan on taking S to dinner Sunday and saying our goodbyes. H and I are staying in the area Monday, but don't expect to see S unless an emergency Target run is needed. We're flying home Tuesday AM.</p>
<p>S#2 attends school in a resort area so we made his drop off our family vacation and went a week early. This school also had parent orientation activities the first few days after move in, so we stayed for those.</p>
<p>I found it much easier to leave my kids after having spent some time exploring their new homes away from home and becoming familiar with the areas. Stay as long as you like, but once your child moves into the dorm, let him begin his new adventure. Good luck.</p>
<p>Thank you for all the great advice so far. We have orientation in July which includes activities for the parents so in September I just need time to get him moved in and get out of town (in tears I'm sure). Move in is the 25th so sounds like arrive on the 24th and leave the 26th.<br>
MaryTN, love the photo ideas!</p>
<p>(SDiego Mom, I cross-posted with your above schedule; but will leave the post on in case others want to read a long answer):</p>
<p>I wouldn't book anything until you see the schedule for the "week of welcome," which might be available on the college website or tomorrow by phone to the office planning the freshman orientation. </p>
<p>Often there are some events for parents and students at the beginning of the week. Depending on the college, that could be a full day bracketed by two evenings, or one all-day, so study their schedule with care.</p>
<p>Sometimes there's a clearly noted date and time for parents to depart (ours were around 5 p.m.ish), followed by important "students-only" events. Then there were days of orienting days for the students in which the parents had no role whatsoever on campus. </p>
<p>An exception was made for international parents, BTW, recognizing that they have come from far away, but domestically we were needed specifically for the move-in hours, followed by a day of big assembly meetings with various administrators (housing, academics, financial aid). Sometimes there are receptions or convocations in which the college president gives an address. </p>
<p>From out-of-state, there's another wrinkle, which is the travel time and fatigue. We looked for the "student move-in day" (sometimes even that is timed by alphabetization) and stayed in a motel TWO nights before that. We don't get out of the house well, so this gave us an in-between day to sleep in before the day the college expected to see us. It was still possible to walk around the campus and nearby town, which we'd not yet seen.</p>
<p>The hard part is knowing whether to come home the same day as you say goodbye, or book yet one more night in a hotel for just the adult(s) before you journey home. We did it various ways with the 3 kids. It's lonely to go back to the hotel alone, but it's also pretty tiring to do the all-day move-in, meetings, hug good-bye and THEN deal with airports. Depends on your strength and habits, I guess.</p>
<p>While it's great to save sales tax, you might want to consider whether you want to be shopping for everything right then or do some in advance. There are lots of threads about shopping and packing on CC to give guidance.</p>
<p>If you actually HAVE a week and you want a vacation, I'll describe what we did which was a little unusual, but worked for us. We had never seen that part of the country, so planned 3 days in a city 2 hours away from the college. As a matter of fact, it was San Diego, and we had the best time, just the 3 of us, as tourists. Then we drove to the campus town, in Orange CA, and did the usual parental move-in thing with our student in the second half of our week. We loved your city, and also benefitted from being alone with our kid away from the pressures of home, as a last memory before college began. So if you have a week and want to splurge, consider finding a cool tourist destination in Oregon for an in-between time with your kid. Once you drive over to the college community, however, you'll see the departure vibes begin...</p>
<p>Lots of good advice in terms of minimum time. If you want to do other things in the area, you should schedule extra time. We are going to have a vacation that we combine with our son's moving in. </p>
<p>Some colleges do schedule orientation events for parents and basically have a send off when those end. You can go by that too.</p>
<p>We spent two nights so we had a full day to move kid into the dorm. They didn't want us around after 7pm or so of move-in day when there was a dorm meeting for our kid. We had dinner and dropped him off at the dorm afterwards. There was a parent welcome and lunch on move int day. If you've got a lot of shopping you might do it the day before move-in day, or if you want to stay to sight see without kid, you could stay an extra day or two. But you shouldn't expect to see your kid during orientation week. They have a full schedule and it generally doesn't include parents.</p>
<p>
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Three days. Three hours to kid move in. And the remainder time without kid: Twelve hours to hit the outlet stores, computer stores, and malls. Twelve hours to see the sights. Nine hours to make peace with son and negotiate terms of endearment.
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</p>
<p>^^^Just like...^^^
Last year with freshman Son: We arrived on a Tuesday with hotel reservation until Sat night. Shopped Wednesday. Moved-In Thursday; more shopping; dinner out, just the 2 of us. Freshman/Parent Orientation activities Friday & Saturday...hardly saw son as he had already connected with roommate and other dorm-mates and made plans. I spent most of Friday and Saturday on my own...son had already made the move to college student.</p>
<p>If I had known then, what I know now...one day for shopping, 1/2 day for move-in and meeting the roommate's parents. I was content to be on my own (loved the "vacation"), but son definitely did not need me there, or really care that I was in the vicinity ("home" being 3000 miles away). Judge your own stay by how independent your child is and how easily they make friends and are comfortable assimilating into the college environment.</p>
<p>I did check with the school and there is nothing for the parents. That is the purpose of the orientation in July. They said most come and move their kid in and leave. But, 75% of the kids at the Univ. live in the state as well so that simplifies things. We have to fly. Unfortunately my husband can't go. S2 has school and soccer so my husband is staying home with him. His roommate will be his friend from H.S. so that part will be easy.</p>
<p>Too much time is too much time. Once the stuff is moved into the dorm, everything gets a little awkward. Whether you plan to sleep over another night is a separate thing, but you should plan to leave your child as soon as possible after the move-in (unless there is some sort of formal parent-child event to attend, but if so immediately after that).</p>
<p>I still remember my father taking me to college. I loved my father a lot, and never had any conflict with him. I was ready for him to leave 30 minutes after we arrived. Paying attention to him was 180 degrees from what seemed important to me then.</p>
<p>I've only had experience with two universities, my own and D's, but in both cases parents got their kids installed in late Aug./early Sept. and then there was some sort of 'Freshman Week' to get the kids acclimated. So I'm curious about these orientations during the summer: are people expected to spend the time and money to travel to the school twice, instead of just once for the move-in?</p>
<p>I flew with DD and she and I attended orientation for two days. Then I visited with a friend for another day and then flew home. It was a cross country trip so I figured four days was a good thing. We arrived the day before the orientation began and did the move in and shopping. Then the next two days were filled with orientation. I went to dinner with two CC invisible friends...it was FUN! Then one night with the friend. Flew out on Wednesday and flew back on Sunday...but really only spent Wed with DD. Th and Fr were orientation.</p>
<p>DS was one state away. Also did the two day orientation thing...but no wrap around days. Drove up for the first day...moved him in, went to orientation, drove home when it ended.</p>