Interesting suggestion for a dinner stop if we’re delayed getting out of the airport (we’ll all be on west coast time) - my aunt and uncle lived in Upper Montclair when I was growing up and we used to visit every year while staying with my grandparents in Paterson.
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I’ve been curious about The George hotel in Montclair. It not only looks lovely, but the owners are make-up millionaire Bobbi Brown and her husband. https://www.thegeorgemontclair.com/
My daughter got engaged recently in the Hudson Valley. We flew into Newark and drove there. Highly recommend Storm King sculpture park and the most beautiful view restaurant I have ever ever experienced Blu Pointe. The Hampton Inn in Newburgh was perfectly nice.
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Hyatt House Jersey City NJ (not to be confused with Hyatt Regency) – has some of the best views of southern Manhattan that I’ve ever seen. Especially at night. About 30 mins from EWR and plenty of restaurant opportunities.
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Lots of good suggestions and I’ll throw out one more: Hudson, NY. Cute Main Street, tons of good restaurants, and lots of antique stores to browse. Olana state historic site is beautiful.
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I spent few days there for a company retreat. I will say I felt uneasy the whole time I was there. I asked them to move me from a large dark suite to a smaller renovated room with more light. The hallways were winding and dark.
Beacon and Hyde Park are good towns to visit.
Redrum
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Based on everyone’s advice, I’m narrowing down to two scenarios:
Drive up to Newburgh and stay at the airport Homewood Suites, possible dinner at Blu Point, then tour West Point and Storm King Art Center Friday before heading up to Saratoga Springs (no idea yet when brother’s rehearsal dinner will start).
Drive up to Poughkeepsie and stay at the Hyatt Place, dinner at a CIA venue if possible, something FDR-ish or the Vanderbilt mansion Friday, maybe Walkway over the Hudson?
Much as I myself would love to wander charming quaint towns and shops, drawbacks are (1) time and (2) husband and son. I might fit some such in that Saturday in Saratoga Springs (staying at the Embassy Suites) but wedding activities begin at 4:00 and I’ll need time to get ready. (Not concerned with what to wear since I’ll be the mostly unknown out-of-town aunt of the groom. Mass of guests will be wedding couple’s NYC friends and bride’s Long Island relatives. Perhaps I’ll just show up in typical San Diego casual waterfront wear.)
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NYC metro wedding tend to be fancy affairs, with a ton of great food, have fun.
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Husband and son will love FDR museum - good choice
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Yes it is! And if you love art…it’s a great place.
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I wouldn’t call Saratoga NYC metro…and that’s where the wedding is @marilyn.
But sounds like you have some good thoughts for your stop along the way!
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This site appears in only one of the two potential scenarios, however.
I thought the same thing when @Mjkacmom mentioned NYC metro but I believe @Marilyn mentioned that many of the couple’s friends and family are from NYC and LI. I’m guessing there’s a decent chance it will be fancy. In my experience the LI contingent will be fancy no matter what.
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Nephew and bride are in Brooklyn and are techie/artsy, but from what I understand, bride’s family has some kind of money and LI status. And Saratoga does have an image of upscale summer resort in my mind. Or is that Sarasota 
? At any rate, the couple is theoretically throwing the wedding themselves.
It would be nice to have more than a partial day to explore the Hudson valley, but alas not this time. We have been through there, husband has been in his younger years. My parents met at Grossingers!
Having a couple of options to consider is great.
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It’s Saratoga. Very charming town. If you have never been, I think you will like it.
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LOL, I do know Sarasota; been there.
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As @thumper1 wrote Saratoga definitely is a charming town. Back in the day it was THE place to be - August was the horse racing season, the mineral springs and associated spas, grand hotels and gambling.
I grew up not far from Saratoga and we went Saratoga Spa State Park several times a summer. You could fill your own bottles with the mineral spring waters that gave the town it’s name. Different springs have different tastes.
It’s grown into a lovely year-round town.
In case anyone else is interested in learning more –
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I know it’s not nyc metro (I live in nyc metro), but if the family and guests are from nyc metro…
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Blu Pointe is a good choice. My mother lives on that side of the river and that is our go to place for special occasions.
WP graduation is the weekend before and plebe summer start is a month away, so things should be quiet there.
Depending on how much time you have, you could add in a stop at the DIA in Beacon after WP and Storm King. Going up the east side of the river also gives the opportunity hit Rhinebeck or Hudson.
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