"Pairing college roomies is tricky"

Parents Forum
1

<p>Saw this article in the yesterday's paper and though other parents might find it interesting. My D's college roommate questionnaire was very short, just a few questions. Frankly, I did not even know what she wrote in there, and I know that the school does not take these questionnaires too seriously. My only suggestion to my D was to mention her asthma, so she would not get stuck with a smoker even though she checked "non-smoker only" box.
Apparently, some schools have very elaborate roomie match-up programs. How did your kid's college handle his/her housing assignments?</p>

<p>Living</a> | Online or on paper, pairing college roomies is tricky | Seattle Times Newspaper</p>

<p>
[quote]
Experts say the best college living experience allows students to redefine themselves. "It isn't about who you are; it's about who you can be," Babitz says. "People are coming to college to create their own independent identity, and it shouldn't be a Facebook profile that documents how they were in high school."

[/quote]

^I agree with that.</p>

2

<p>Can't quite believe the part about the parents filling out the questionnaire and fudging the facts about their own child, hoping that the roommate's characteristics will "rub off." Wow.</p>

3

<p>^^Such a futile hope..</p>

<p>My D's college sent along a short questionnaire that my D filled out- I never saw afterwards, it but it was only one page. I found out on move-in day that the admissions office actually placed kids in their living arrangements, not the housing office. They used information from their application. They had some elaborate method that matched students in terms of habits and personality, but somehow mixed them up according to interest. I never really understood it, but it seemed to work well.
My son's small LAC had the students fill out a fairly elaborate questionnaire, asking about all sorts of interests along with a small essay describing their ideal roommate, as well as the one they really would not want. Then the student dorm RAs whom they would have next year matched the freshman roommates and floors. It was out of the school administration's hands entirely. This method also seemed to work well- son is still close to his roommate and to the people on his floor that first year.
Both of my kids liked most of the other students at their colleges- I think they would have gotten along with almost anyone. Parents worry far too much about roommate selection, imho.</p>

4

<p>That article is typical *Washington Post *pablum. It is essentially a promo advertising piece for a software company, probably where the "reporter's" boyfriend works.</p>

<p>Think about this opening piece of jibberish:</p>

<p>
[quote]
Although some schools still match students based on a short questionnaire about living habits (Do you smoke? Play loud music? Live like a slob?), the room assignment process is becoming increasingly sophisticated.

[/quote]
</p>

<p>Uh, hello! According the Washington Post, it is now "unsophisticated" to match non-smokers with non-smokers, loud music listeners with loud music listeners, and slobs with roommates who are equally guilty.</p>

<p>What a bunch of inside-the-beltway nonsense. Those are exactly the kinds of a-level lifestyle issues that can lead to unhappy roommate matches. Yet, the *Washington Post *suggest to ignore them in favor of lord know what? Questions about preferences in Georgetown nouvelle cuisine brasseries?</p>

5

<p>My d's college has gone totally in the opposite direction. They do NO roommate matching, other than for health reasons (smoking, which is prohibited on the entire campus, wheelchair access, etc.) They apparently tested matching technologies (forms, computer programs, etc.) against doing no matching, and could find no differences in student satisfaction. They do have one themed dorm (intercultural/international), and many "themed-and-seminared" floor and sections, and have determined that these are more important to student satisfaction.</p>

6

<p>D1 was paired by coach with another incoming freshman from her sports team. Seemed to work while they were in season but not so much when season was finished and roomie learned she liked the party life. Although still friends and teammates D1 moved in with another player who doesn't drink as much. D2 will be paired with another athlete but not necessarily from her sport. Coaches feel another athlete knows how you have to have quiet time to study and how practices and away trips affect sleep and study patterns.</p>

7

<p>My daughter's college lets kids post their profiles (how much they study, what time they get up, how social they are, whether or not they indent to "go Greek") and match themselves by finding like-minded people, but for those who let the school match them, kids are just placed in dorm rooms in the order they applied for housing. </p>

<p>Like mini said:

[quote]
They do NO roommate matching

[/quote]
</p>

<p>The first kid who applied goes first and gets his first choice. The 785th kid who applied? First they look to see what his first choice dorm was. If there is half of a double room open in that dorm with the type of bathroom that he was willing to pay for, that is where he goes. If not, they check his second choice dorm. If there is half of a double room open in that dorm with the type of bathroom that he was willing to pay for, that is where he goes.</p>

<p>The selection process is just to go down the list in order, with a few exceptions. There are some programs that have special housing, and those dorms are only open to kids in those programs. Only the honors kids can request the honors dorms, for example. If you and your roommate request each other, once they come to you on the list, they place your roommate with you, so it is to the advantage of someone who applied late for housing to hook up with someone who applied early.</p>

<p>Before I heard this at orientation, I thought that the housing office used those profiles that the kids filled out on line to match them with roommates, but no. They just kachunk kachunk down the list in order until all of the spaces are full.</p>

<p>Back in ancient times, when I was an RA in a dorm, the most important thing that kids were matched on was that non-smokers were placed with non-smokers. Now, I think that no one is allowed to smoke in dorm rooms anyway, so they don't need to worry so much about the smoke issue. (Although I would not like a roommate whose jackets, etc., all smelled smoky.)</p>

8

<p>Sonoma didn't even send a questionnaire. The furthest they went was asking if we had any preferences that we would like/dislike in a roommate, or if we had a preference as to which floor we were placed on. However, we couldn't request "lifestyle choices" (ie religion, race, sexuality, etc.).</p>

<p>It's weird, though...my roommate and I have a TON in common! It's weird to think that the process was that random when we get along so well.</p>

9

<p>^My college didn't have a questionnaire either and they didn't ask anything at all .</p>

10

<p>When my son was filling out his housing information he came across the question: Male Female Other
My 12 year old daughter was there and asked, "What is an Other."
Oh my, way to young to start that discussion.....:) but it made us laugh.</p>

11

<p>
[quote]
my roommate and I have a TON in common! It's weird to think that the process was that random when we get along so well.

[/quote]

you haven't even moved in together yet, don't count your chickens before they hatch...</p>

12

<p>
[quote]
My d's college has gone totally in the opposite direction. They do NO roommate matching, other than for health reasons (smoking, which is prohibited on the entire campus, wheelchair access, etc.) They apparently tested matching technologies (forms, computer programs, etc.) against doing no matching, and could find no differences in student satisfaction.

[/quote]

Same with my d's college. They asked exactly two questions: Smoking or non (although the dorms are all non-smoking, they acknowledged the lingering odor on the clothing of smokers), and do you want special interest housing (only about 3 choices). There was no "first choice, second choice"; while students made comments on the form about where they'd like to be, those were rarely followed.</p>

13

<p>My S filled in a questionnaire (never saw it empty or completed). He & his room mate got along great except for one thing--roommie loved early morning hockey on weekends (watching it on TV) while S loved sleeping in. Rommie fortunately used a headset to watch, so they got along great for the year but found new room mates for future. His friends all were fine with their room mates as well.
I'm hoping D will have equal luck with her room mate, as she will be leaving for college as a transfer this January. Will keep fingers crossed.
Both of my kids are HIGHLY allergic, so hopefully D will have a room mate that doesn't use overpowering scents & smoke.</p>

14

<p>S2's state u. form consisted of three questions....Do you prefer non-smoking? Do you prefer an Academic year hall? and Which of the 3 living areas of campus do you prefer? List preference 1,2,3. There was absolutely no choice of specific dorm, just an area. S2 chose to room with a friend from h.s.</p>

15

<p>I never saw D's questionnaire, but I believe she said it had two questions on it, and they were along the lines of "smoker/non-smoker" and "early bird/night owl".</p>

<p>All the first years live with their first-year-seminar classmates though, so I guess that's mainly how they match them up.</p>

16

<p>I told my son, prior to his heading off freshman year, to learn from my experience. </p>

<p>I took one look at my assigned roommate lo these many years ago, and thought to myself 'This will never work!' Based on looks alone, I made this assessment with all of the wisdom and experience of an 18-year old. She just didn't seem "like" me.</p>

<p>Within a month we were great friends. What an eye-opener for me, and a long-term life lesson.</p>

<p>It's not a marriage, after all. I think the questionnaires are cute and might help make compatible matches. But I don't think they need to make it into an eHarmony.com.</p>

17

<p>I was initially slightly put off by how few questions our questionnaire had, but after actually living with a roommate, I've become convinced that there's really no good way to pair people up and so it might as well be random (with a few caveats like smoking and general sleeping habits, which is what our questionnaire had). I came to this conclusion because I actually had the opposite experience from jmmom--if you looked at my roommate and me on paper, you would have thought that we would get along well based on all we had in common, but it just didn't click. It wasn't awful, I could have lived with her all year without being severely affected (she ended up changing rooms after the first semester, leaving me with a very, very large single spring semester, which was fantastic), but we definitely were not on our way to become lifelong pals.</p>

18

<p>In my case, it would have helped if the questionnaire could have ascertained in advance whether my roommate was likely to be a racist anti-Semite.</p>

<p>(In my older d's case, the extensive questionnaire matched up my early morning-rising, infrequent-imbibing, quiet, studious introvert with a late-night partying icehockey player. Needless to say, there was a parting of the ways after six weeks.)</p>

19

<p>DD's school is known for trying hard to do a good match with long questionnaire. Unfortunately they picked the wrong details to use as a keys for common interests. What really was important and caused the friction point was the fact that roommate studied at night or early am hours, including setting her alarm to go off to study in the middle of the night and DD needed her sleep to stay healthy as a singer. Roommate was also the youngest one and DD was the oldest, the difference was over 18 months. That is a big difference in maturity and outlook at that age.</p>

20

<p>The studying/partying habits can be dealbreakers. Fortunately, neither S nor his room mate were "partiers," so that wasn't a problem.</p>

<p>I know that my S hates waking early & was often awake calling me at or beyond midnight his time. His freshman room mate was a hockey player & I believe they had very early morning practices, so I'm not sure how that worked out. They were both pretty quiet & considerate of the other, so they got along even tho their schedules were pretty dramatically different.</p>