Parent Recommendation Letter

<p>I know I've seen a thread on this, but I've done multiple searches and just can't find it. Two of the colleges to which Son is applying "strongly recommend" parent recommendation letters. How are these helpful? Wouldn't every parent gush about his or her child? Are they looking for specific traits that are mentioned to see if the student would be a good fit? Any guidance you can give would be greatly appreciated.</p>

<p>Wow, our HS asks for a parents letter for the use of the college counselor, but I've never heard of a COLLEGE actually asking for a parents' letter. My only advice would be to be honest, especially if these are small liberal arts school - honest, not brutally honest. No need to list the traits that drive you crazy.</p>

<p>We had to write a parent letter for one of our son's applications. We made it short, simple, and casual. Instead of gushing about how smart he is--blah blah blah--we focused on his sense of humor and "surfer" attitude. It was all of about 2 paragraphs long and we made a point to not sound like bragging parents. He was accepted to the school but decided to attend a different one. Good luck.</p>

<p>Let the teacher recommendations focus on academics. Let your recommendation highlight his personality.</p>

<p>SUNY Geneseo wants a parent rec. I'd try to write a really interesting or funny one so at least they'd remember the applicant.</p>

<p>I'm trying to figure out the value of a parent recommendation letter? Who is going to say anything other than stellar things? That would be very interesting to have to write one though. Perhaps I'll write one just for the fun of it to see how I really feel about them... lol</p>

<p>I faced this for my S in the admission process at the private school level, not college. </p>

<p>I read the literature that the school sent out to prospective parents/students. I figured that if their own literature stressed certain aspects of what the school had to offer, that was a good "outline" for what they were looking for: someone who would make use of and add to thoses things. It worked at the private school level.</p>

<p>I too suggest honesty in assessing the student. I think that a total "rah-rah" letter lacks persuasion.</p>

<p>Added in regard to pmrlcomm: if part of the focus is what the school can offer to the student and how this would work to the advantage of both the student and the school, it doesn't have to be a "personal puff piece" for the student.</p>

<p>Muffy333, we wrote one for Geneseo. (see previous post above)</p>

<p>I wrote one for his Eagle Scout application. It was about five sentences long. </p>

<p>I mean, I do think my son is amazing....what he has achieved while having Asperger's impresses the heck out of me. I know that I can talk about a few positive traits that others probably don't write about - like him being utterly non-judgmental. </p>

<p>The cynic in me keeps wondering if the letter is never a positive but could be a negative. For example, if a student has great grades and no ECs and the parent writes about how nice it is that the student studies all the time, it would just confirm the school's perception that the student is not well rounded.</p>

<p>Since reading the threads on CC discloses that some students have parents who provide no guidance, no parental support and, on a few occasions actively are not in favor of their child going to college, maybe it lets the school know which students come with parental support and encouragement.</p>

<p>Perhaps it is also an opportunity to give subtle hints to the admissions office that the parents aren't helicopter loonies?</p>

<p>Perhaps it is also an opportunity to give subtle hints to the admissions office that the parents aren't helicopter loonies?</p>

<p>Why? Because the helicoper loonies will write a letter that is three pages single spaced, and others will write a five sentence email?</p>

<p>Nah--Length alone wouldn't necessarily tell the tale. </p>

<p>I think there are ways to stress the student's attributes and indicate that the student is "looking forward" to the challanges, that telegraphs it is the student who is going to be attending college, not the parents.</p>

<p>missypie--your posts focus on the things that your son has achieved and aspires to accomplish (non-helicopter), while most helicopter posts seem to focus on "how dare this or that not go the way the PARENT thinks it should."</p>

<p>It is just my guess, but if the college highly recommends the parent letter, they want one.</p>

<p>We had to write one at the hs private school level. My husband wrote it and then I read over it and suggested a few changes. Good letter (about a page) - and thinking about it, it permitted glimpses into my son's personality that wouldn't necessarily be remarked on in a teacher recommendation. My husband concentrated less on what the school could deduce about my son from test scores and ecs, but about his personal strengths and, yes, weaknesses. We (son and parents) chose the hs because it was a good match (boy to school, school to boy), and that came across in the letter. </p>

<p>Davidson used to ask for a peer recommendation. My d wrote one for a friend, and a friend wrote one for my d. I thought that was also a way to get a glimpse of the applicant from a different pov.</p>

<p>We gushed. We wrote to two schools. I think it just gives adcom a different perspective of the applicant. I believe one's relationship with parents defines the person more than anything else. I gave the letter to our daughter later and she cried.</p>

<p>I've never been asked to write one for a college, but our GC asks us to respond to a couple of prompts along the lines of: what is your favorite memory involving your child? What is their best character trait? and a couple of others.</p>

<p>I ended up writing about a preschool experience with her, and reflecting on an evaluation by that teacher. Nothing about her IQ, but a lot about her approach to life that showed up very early. It was just a few sentences. My point is that creating a prompt for yourself that isn't "how to make my kid look wonderful" but more about responding to the idea that you know your child in a way that no teacher, GC or coach does is key.</p>

<p>^^oldfort, wonderful! My D read mine as well. I don't think we can tell them too many times the ways that they are unique and loved by us.</p>

<p>I wrote one. The admissions rep told My D's high school GC it was what he remembered. My D never comes to college confidential, but after I spent some time here, I felt she didn't appreciate the nuances of her high school situation (essentially how she became passionate about a high school WE had concerns about).</p>

<p>I let my child do her own applications and admissions related activities when it came to applying to college with one exception. She really wanted to go to one specific top ten school and was deferred early admission. I decided to take a chance and write an unsolicited parent recommendation letter to the regional admissions officer at the school. I told her why I thought my child would be a good fit for the school, her extreme interest in the school and why her specific interests could be converted into a benefit for the school, and a little about her love of learning without regards to its effect on a specific grade in courses that may be challenging to her. Well, she was admitted regular decision and has been getting honors throughout and loves the school. So, whether the letter helped or not I can not say, but it certainly didn't hurt.</p>

<p>Y'all are giving me great ideas for the letter. Thanks.</p>

<p>I had 2 sons who applied to SUNY Geneseo. We did not do the optional parent rec. and both were accepted. D applied to the Robert C. Cook Honors College at Indiana University of PA, which was a very long, detailed app. One rec. had to be from the "person that knows you best". I was flattered that D asked me. Instead of a letter, we were asked to give paragraph answers to 5 out of a list of 10 or 12 questions. I felt a voice combining praise and honest appraisal of her attempts to improve "weaknesses" (ie: disorganization, time management) would lend a more believable tone. She too cried when she read it!
Maybe this link will give you some ideas:</p>

<p><a href="http://old.www.iup.edu/honors/APPLICATION/PersonalRecommendation.pdf%5B/url%5D"&gt;http://old.www.iup.edu/honors/APPLICATION/PersonalRecommendation.pdf&lt;/a&gt;&lt;/p>

<p>I answered nos. 1,4,5,8,9,12</p>

<p>The thread you are looking for might be "Family Letter Sample," which was started in the Parents Forum on July 5, 2008 by New Member PR29690. That thread (to which I contributed, and therefore, have listed in a separate Contributions file) pertained to a university's request for voluntary parental disclosure of personal information regarding "anything you think would be helpful for us to know in order to assist them (incoming freshmen) during their college career." </p>

<p>You can access that thread by Googling "College Confidential," and then typing "PR29690" in the Search CC box provided. You can also access threads specifically pertaining to parent recommendation letters by typing "parent recommendation" in the Search CC box. </p>

<p>I use the Google/Search CC method frequently. It's quick, easy, and almost always provides the information I need.</p>