<p>Ace Hardware or Home depot have door alarms that are run off battery power. Very small. Install usually with a screw or doublesided tape. Smaller than a matchbox (not that we see those anymore).</p>
<p>Stores that sell medical and health supplies and goods have them. Lots of catalogs for people dealing with infirmity or illness. (In fact, those catalogs are pretty interesting, may yield all sorts of good ideas for day to day aids.) We had both a baby monitor (probably CVS or WalMart/Target) and a sensor, probably from the med supply co in town.</p>
<p>From our experience with MIL, it’s not unusual for some either with dementia or recovering from a traumatic injury to be up multiple times at night. If it can be afforded, outside help is a huge benefit to the spouse or family.</p>
<p>The rehab folks your loved one is seeing should be able to help direct you to some of the available aids. Your state Office on Aging may also have suggestions as to businesses that supply some of these aids that others have used. Geriatric social workers may know a lot of direct and useful solutions that are in use, as well as services for respite care (so spouse doesn’t burn out).</p>
<p>My dear father has entered hospice at the same Veterans hospital where he was a patient. His mind is still sound but the heart & lungs are about done. At least now he is more comfortable, can breathe more easily, is slightly sedated against anxiety, and is off the IVs. (And…No one is asking for a blood sample every 6 hours to try to fix that which is unfixable.) They take really good care of our veterans there. </p>
<p>We are relieved it was all decided so easily, upon the doctor’s and social worker’s recommendation. And I’m glad it was within the time frame of my visit. Everything has turned out so well. We hope he continues to be happy and comfortable for as long as he has left.</p>
<p>–Mommusic</p>
<p>Surf city- you are New Jersey correct. My 84 year old mother fell on nov 24 breaking her pelvis in a way usually seen in trauma cases. She spent seven weeks in accute rehab, complications, became non weight bearing, and then came to my house for the last 8 weeks. We had excellent therapists with holy redeemer.
While at Bacharach rehab, I obtained the names of several aides who we got to know, and wanted extra hours. By the way the rehab staff is not supposed to solicit you,but if you ask you might locate people you like.</p>
<p>I’m told by a friend who has live in help, it’s a matter of " fit", so don’t hesitate to request another aid if it doesn’t work out.</p>
<p>I was 24/7 for my mother, and it was grueling for about a month. We only had occupational and physical therapist.
Yesterday my mother returned to her condo, to independent life ,is walking without a cane, and pain free.
Today the hospital bed, and wheelchair were picked up by lincoln medical supply- excellent experience. </p>
<p>PM if you’d like and might be considering the agencies I’ve mentioned. </p>
<p>Oh, investigate shingles vaccine, that complicated life on week 9 of recovery. Ugh, awful. </p>
<p>Looking for thoughts or advice. My mom went with my sister today to look at an apartment in an over 55 place and both thought it was perfect. Beautiful unit, overlooking a pool, barely any walking. My mom needs to sell her place to be able to afford to rent. The thought behind it was it would give her cash to not have to worry about living on such a limited income. When my sister went to pull her credit card all sorts of false info came up - like mortgage on some house and all kinds of charges. Apparently she’s a victim of identity fraud. Then she couldn’t find her social security card, then she said she throws out her bills so she didn’t have a power bill to show them she lives there. My sis naturally freaks out, but I’m trying to tell my mom to keep calm, we’ll figure something out. The social security and power bill are easy. Not sure what on earth to say about the credit report though and if that will keep her from being able to rent. I have good credit and I wouldn’t mind co-signing or signing the lease myself if I had to - would any of you think there would be a problem with that?</p>
<p>@mommusic, I am glad your dad can be at a place of peace and so glad it fit with your vist. I am sorry about the eventual outcome, I hope this time is a gift that is all good. </p>
<p>eyeamom, I don’t know about the lease and the identy theft is a big deal. ORE does have special help for seniors with identity theft so maybe your state can do something to help her as well. I’d see an accountant/lawyer about the lease. I’d do it for my mom, too, but my H would have a heart attack if I suggested it which makes me think it needs checking for “the right thing”. </p>
<p>@mommusic – Sorry your dad is in hospice, hopefully it’s a relief for him and you that he’s in a place where he’s comfortable and well cared for. It certainly made a huge difference for us. </p>
<p>@eyemamom – Oh no. Identity theft can be such a tangled mess. Is there a senior support organization near your mother that can help you wade through it? Sorry you have to deal with this.</p>
<p>My in laws have problems stemming from a stroke my FIL had a year ago which left him with aphasia. No close family lives nearby, and we do not hear about many things until later even though we talk at least once a week. Sometimes we only find out by accident. My MIL says she doesn’t want to worry us. Well just the opposite is the effect, because we worry constantly. </p>
<p>to all you with experience, are we just going to have to start asking more pointed questions?</p>
<p>Yes, @motherof4pearls, you will have to push the issue. My mother had a stroke several years ago and has both receptive and expressive aphasia. I live close, but it’s amazing what they can get up to in our absences.</p>
<p>I thought one of the first steps with possible identity fraud was to call the credit bureau? We had something like this (when buying our home) that was an admin error (I don’t now what to call it.) I don’t want to minimize what may be going on for eyemamon, but ours was not identity theft. We filled out a report for the credit bureau.</p>
<p>mommusic, I’m so sorry about your father. He’s fortunate to be in hospice, where they won’t keep pestering him and he can be as comfortable as possible. Hospice staff usually know a lot about treating symptoms and making their patients feel more comfortable.</p>
<p>eyemamom sorry about the identity theft complication. Hopefully you have contacted the three credit bureaus and got at least one report on what is going on and taken appropriate action. If the apt complex is run where they will only rent with a credit score of …, then it may take some time to untangle the identity theft and have the credit reporting cleared up. Some apts have some management decision/owner where the situation is looked at and maybe you can get a lease.</p>
<p>Hopefully you can get some assistance from a local elderly support agency.</p>
<p>Let us know what happens.</p>
<p>My dear father passed away early this morning. We are glad he was not in hospice very long, was well cared for and comfortable, and that all his children and grandchildren got to see him at the appropriate time. </p>
<p>His house also sold recently, which is a good thing for technical reasons. </p>
<p>Now comes a difficult week but no more difficult than the past few weeks have been. </p>
<p>My condolences @Momannoyed. I too felt the same way after my dad passed. The waiting felt interminable. Hugs to you and your family. </p>
<p>My condolences to Momannoyed. It sounds like the hospice was a help for you.</p>
<p>I am amazed at the people I have met working in the hospital, rehab, visiting nurse assn, and home care. Almost all of them have been so warm and friendly and caring to us. My dad is very introverted and private, but they have treated him in a way that made him feel comfortable.</p>
<p>Dad is home now and I did hire an aide for last night. Mom said she slept wonderfully because she could rest without worrying if dad would get out of bed by himself. He accepted the aide better than I thought. He agrees that he needs a support person when he walks somewhere, but due to the brain injury he then forgets this and will get up on his own if we aren’t there to watch him. Very frustrating. I am trying to think of a “cue” for him to remind him to stay seated and call for mom or ring a bell etc.</p>
<p>Sorry for your loss, Momannoyed. Be kind to yourself and take comfort where you can.</p>
<p>Mommusic, I am sorry for your loss. It seems very very fast. I am glad he was in a peaceful place for all of your sakes. Sending hugs and strength for the next steps.</p>
<p>@momannoyed - so sorry for your loss. It sounds like it was a blessing to not prolong any suffering.</p>
<p>Turns out my sis is an idiot and she didn’t know how to read the credit report. However, I decided to co-sign the lease on the rental as the elderly woman who owns the place is worried that the bulk of my mothers money will be coming from the sale of her property, which isn’t even on the market. I’d pay my moms rent if she ever needed it, and I could afford to do it so it really isn’t an issue for me. </p>
<p>We just went through the loss of my father. It was an unpredictable and ever changing journey. We found the people involved in the last weeks of his life to be amazing. The emotional fortitude, spiritual awareness and capacity for kindness shown by the caregivers was inspiring. My father was confused, combative, loving, humorous, sullen, loving, agreeable, disagreeable, aware, unaware, patient and inpatient all within moments during his last days in this sphere of existence. His caregivers were accepting, supportive and loving through all of it.</p>
<p>Comfort, care and hugs to all traveling this path.</p>