Regarding gift ideas, I’m sure gift cards and a sweet card are always appreciated. And if you’re thinking of a gift for the facility, I know a family who wanted to honor the facility who lovingly cared for their grandmother, and they donated a beautiful clock.
Sorry for your loss. Regarding dementia, I have an illness that gives me episodes of dementia (I can’t tie my shoes, recognize people or speak, etc.) and I do know that when I was in the episodes, I remembered them later when lucid and I also knew who my family was not by name, but just I knew I was safe with them and could ask them for help. Any comfort was much appreciated because I did get that someone was looking out for me, and it was very scary otherwise.
For # of DCs, I ordered 5 on the advice of the funeral home, then ordered 10 more based on what others suggested. I think I have two left. But, it only took a week to get 10 more, which was not bad.
My father passed in spring 2017, and his estate is still not done due to a few reasons. On the advice front, I’m having a heck of a time dispensing of a storage locker with some memorabilia, some of which is only personal but other things from the 1920s - 1950s that might be worth something. Anyone know how best to sell it? Are there people who would look at it and make me an offer (that aren’t crooked)?
That begs the question of siblings that promise they “definitely want” something or other, I held onto it, and now they forgot. I want to make some donations, so a thought was to ask if Goodwill might send a truck to take a few things like a kitchen table and shelves.
@tx5athome , very sorry for your loss.
@compmom, sounds about right. FIL told us if we wouldn’t bring his car to the SNF so he could drive home he would borrow a bike and ride home.
Depending on where you live either antique type places or auction houses. You might be surprised what people actually want. Without knowing what you have and research would have no idea of worth but many things have tags etc that you can look up. Also using something like Google lens (I think) can help you look up a product.
My mother has had three large squamous cell skin cancer lesions in two months. The latest one, on her arm, was huge. COVID means noone is seeing these until they have grown enormous. Noone is showering her or dressing her or looking her over.
Then again they seem to be growing so fast that it is hard to catch them.
The last one, on the arm, was taken out and cauterized, but within two weeks has already grown back higher than skin level. She is going to have to have Moh’s surgery to get it all out or it will spread to lymph nodes and potentially beyond.
Clearly there is something going on with her immune system. Squamous cell skin cancers going off like fireworks.
I will be taking her to the doctor. Otherwise I just see her at the window 1-2 times/week. It continues to be weird having to keep distant.
I will say that the assisted living facility has stepped up and they are caring for her wounds. If they had done this much pre-COVID I could have flown to Aruba for a month!!
For those of you with parents in assisted living or other facility, what are the plans for holiday visiting, or for visiting in general?
I am concerned that my mother’s facility is having indoor visits in common areas, regularly, and in two places inside on Thanksgiving. COVID is rising in our area.
@compmom I just got a letter from the AL that they are tightening up some visit protocols. (Our state just issued more restrictions on mandatory mask wearing and quarantining if coming back from out of state).
They are having visits during certain week day hours, when they are highly staffed, because vetting visitors takes time. Visitors have to complete a checklist, get their temperature taken and show ID that they do not live out of state. We can visit for up to a half hour. They are also buying heaters to put on the patio and encouraging us to visit out there if the weather isn’t too bad.
Indoor visits take place in the private dining room or sales office and it is disinfected after each visit. We have to be masked the whole time.
We are also not allowed to take loved ones out for non medical appts and any time someone leaves they have to quarantine upon return.
It stinks, but what can you do? Luckily my parents are in Memory Care and it is easier there, since they have no concept of time. I have been impressed with the new staff, but I do miss seeing my folks regularly. We have taken to writing them letters and dropping them off. Just like dad did for me when I was in college!
@surfcity maybe we are dealing with the same state- sounds familiar!
Just bumping up this thread (if that is even a thing with the new platform 
) to see how everyone is doing.
My parents place is back in lockdown because they had their first staff member test positive. They will test everyone and wait some time before allowing visits again. I saw my parents on Thanksgiving weekend, outside under a heater, they wore blankets and we were masked. It is better than nothing.
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