@panpacific, I have several dear friends who immigrated to this country as adults. They aren’t “new immigrants,” they’re Americans. And they can have whatever customs they want, but if they refuse to speak to their kids I’ll think the same of them as I do every other parent (American or otherwise) who behaves that way.
What makes you think “a few more hours of practice” is all that stands between a child and success (whether it be in sports or academics)? You remind me of another poster who likes to insist anyone can get all A’s if they study hard enough. My dyslexic daughter studies harder than anyone I know. Is she a failure in your eyes if she doesn’t get all A’s? I went to
school with a boy who desperately wanted to be on the varsity basketball team. He practiced for hours all year long. He could’ve practiced 'til the cows came home and it wouldn’t matter. He couldn’t sink a basket to save his life. What he could do was run. He was tall, and he was fast. One of our coaches suggested he try out for the track team, and he turned out to be a great runner. He was on a team, which is what he wanted. There’s a lot to be said for accepting children as they are and encouraging them to look past disappointments to take advantage of the opportunities they’ve been given.