<p>Columbia is a great acceptance, Consolation. Congratulations to your son. I hope he’s able to go. And if not, he’ll move on to something else. Though your 20s is the time you should be exploring, it is painful to watch that play out in today’s world. Women had about half the opportunities as men in 1970, when I graduated, but still we all found jobs. </p>
<p>My son continued his exploration of a culinary career, finding a job in a new restaurant right after graduation. By Labor Day, he had decided that he was done. He’s been looking ever since. He’s done volunteer work, pursued all his hobbies, been hugely helpful with chores and repairs around the house, and done something almost every day to look for a job. He worked with two agencies that were not helpful. Now he’s finally having interviews, but no takers yet. And he’s signed up with a new agency that seems much more professional and not bait-and-switch. He’s doing a temp assignment next week. </p>
<p>He’s a smart, diligent, hard-working kid who spent his college summers in a paid job, unpaid internship, language study, and then cooking. He’s a fantastic writer and a very hard worker. Job hunting has been his full-time job. He has second guessed every decision he made in college–including his decision not to transfer. I tell him he has to start from the present and move on. So though the news at the moment isn’t great, things are looking up. What I don’t like is when people assume he gave up the chef plan because the work was “too hard.” Not true. He did decide that he wanted more financial comfort and that he was not going to get intellectual satisfaction in a kitchen. Now, he cooks dinner for us! His goal is grad school in something related to his major field. But that will come later.</p>
<p>Consolation, I’m a writer and editor and have fantasized about an MFA in creative nonfiction, just for fun (expensive fun). But, gulp, hearing your statistics, I’m not so sure!</p>
<p>It’s so nice to hear about everyone else’s 2012ers. They do grow up.</p>
<p>From my perspective, it’s reassuring that not everyone’s child is so sure that their major or first job is really what they want to be doing. For my son I think he’s still interested in his major (poli sci/public policy), but discovering that what he expected working in the field to be like is not exactly the reality of working in the field.</p>
<p>So glad to see the revival of this thread!
Congratulations to the '12s! they are growing up.</p>
<p>My D took off the year, but did grad school apps in the fall. We are waiting to hear where she will end up. She did get in all 4 places she applied (PhD Material Science). I think it is down to 2, warm weather CA or cold weather with BF MA (BF got and accepted PhD Chem E MIT). Decision has to be made for tax day. I can hardly keep from hounding her on the decision! But she has been working and fighting a cold and not wanting to talk… She is working in MA right now, but it was a tiny step up from and internship and not something she is planning to do long term. She’ll be home for spring break with DS next week and a ski trip is planned. Maybe if we corner her in a 1BR condo we can get some info! LOL She is happy and did quite a lot of traveling, although not as much as she originally wanted, because it wasn’t as fun to do it by yourself. Mom was glad of THAT, I get the travel, but no one male or female, really should wander without someone IMHO.</p>
<p>geezermom, I think it is a lot easier to get into the programs that are not necessarily funded, although “easier” than 1 or 2% is not saying much! It is also true that MFA programs in general seem to prefer people who have more life experience over straight-from-college applicants.</p>
<p>Frankly, I can’t quite figure out how S got into Columbia…he doesn’t have a singe iota of journalism experience: no school papers, no guest columns, no blogs, no nothing. He is a hell of a writer though, I must say. </p>
<p>Has your son read either of Michael Ruhlman’s books about CIA and becoming a chef? It sounds to me as if WRITING about food might suit your guy to a T. Either that, or being an upscale innkeeper. Seriously. Or working for a really good catering/event planning company. Cooking knowledge, organizational ability, excellent communication, business sense, and the ability to pitch in and do whatever needs doing…he might find it more satisfying than working the line. But I don’t recall what his major or other interests are…I think the main thing is that your son is out there actively searching out experiences, and throwing himself into what he does. Eventually his path will unfold. He’s not someone who is going to wake up when he’s 50 and realize that he’s been a drone for the last 30 years.</p>
<p>esobay, it’s tough to wait for resolution when it is so far out of one’s hands, isn’t it?</p>
<p>Esobay, my oldest and his girlfriend are both mat sci’s. Both work in the same industry but are doing different thing. S’s job doesn’t have anything to do with his major but he is loving what he does.</p>
<p>I think it’s so important that these kids are doing all these life changes now when they are young and single. I was talking to my oldest and he has a co worker who applied to executive MBA programs (is that what they call them when you only are on campus once a month). All of S’s co workers were encouraging him to also apply and to do it now! I wish he would but sometimes although I am so happy that both of my kids are really nice SO’s I think that they make decisions based on where the SO is and not what they want to do.</p>
<p>So glad to see this thread revived - I had been wondering about the other 2012 kids and how they were doing!</p>
<p>My own 2012 D is just about done with her first busy season as an accountant for one of the Big 4 accounting firms. Talk about trial by fire! This is week ten of 14+ hour workdays (plus another 2 hours of commuting each day) - luckily they “only” work for 6-8 hours on Saturdays. It sounds like a nightmare to me, but she really likes her team and the client they are auditing. Her manager gave her an employee achievement award for her hard work and her “upbeat attitude” over the past few months - to which I say, are you sure you have the right kid? The one who snarled at me constantly for two years in high school?</p>
<p>I do miss talking to her as much as we used to talk, but obviously she doesn’t have a lot of time to chat right now. She has a serious BF who is also an accountant, which means they rarely see each other (at least until April 15th). </p>
<p>Geezermom - good for your son! He seriously considered and tried out the culinary career and rationally decided it was not for him. What is youth, if not a time to try out possible futures?</p>
<p>tx5 - I’M going to be student teaching myself in a year or so. Yikes!! I’m hoping the job market for teachers heats up, too.</p>
<p>scout59,My S has been workig ridiculous hours too. He left home for a contract job in FL on Jan. 3. He thought it would last for about three weeks. It turned into 8 weeks.
For the first 5 weeks of the job,he worked 80 hours/week…yep, 12 hours…night shift 6pm-6am…seven nights a week. His rented housing for the job was a 45 minute commute away. After the 5th week, he got Sundays off so only had to work 68 hours/week!!</p>
<p>He has moved on to another power plant job now. His commute is only about 10 minutes and he’s on day shift (still 12 hour shifts) so that’s an improvement.<br>
His rented condo for this job is directly across the street from the ocean so at least he has a nice view when he gets in from work! His job really slows down in the summer months (kind of like tax season). S2 is looking forward to that.</p>
<p>geezermom, so glad to hear from you. I remembered your S had taken the culinary trajectory midway through college, and was hoping to hear how he was doing. S2 (class of '14) has taken off a semester and is a prep cook at a local restaurant. He has always been a fabulous cook and has done some catering work as well. He says he doesn’t want to do it for the long haul (similar reasons to what your S said), but it makes him happy. Who knows! If he could combine Russian and food and strategery, he’d be one satisfied camper. </p>
<p>S1 is in CA with his spouse, absolutely loves his job, gets to travel occasionally but not so much that it becomes a pain. They are having their wedding celebration here this summer (had a brief civil ceremony last Aug. due to screwed-up visa issues). Both are considering grad school options, but I think that’s a couple of years out. Will probably need to move before they can buy a house, as prices there are utterly insane.</p>
<p>Me too! My senior has only applied to one school and has already heard. He’ll be heading to Montana, while S1 may be heading to Connecticut. Good thing my middle is attending our local university.</p>
<p>Consolation, i agree, but he seems burned out on the food business altogether. One issue he’s dealing with is his history of having intense interests that lead to burnout. He’s been this way since he was little–never does anything halfway. Right now it seems like he’s trying really, really hard to keep his options open. His major was poli sci, and he’s interviewing for entry-level assistant jobs involving policy, research, advocacy, etc. Meanwhile, he’s doing his photography (career goal #1), cooking (#2), and brewing (college hobby)! Re journalism: a friend’s son went to grad school with no real background, but obvious potential. I think schools appreciate that. The Columbia program sounds great, and of course has a fantastic reputation. By the way, all of my son’s undergrad j-school friends have good jobs, as does my friend’s son.</p>
<p>Scout59, we were proud of his choice, too. Making it seemed to help him settle down and do some soul searching. It helps that friends’ kids are in similar situations.</p>
<p>CountingDown, you learn some serious skills in a kitchen. My S says that you face all the demands of a busy office, only the temperature is 100 degrees, you’re working with sharp tools, and everyone is cursing. (His chef was terrific; the owner was nuts.)</p>
<p>They’ll get through this. But it does feel like 2008 all over again. He bought some new dress slacks yesterday, and I actually worried that he was jinxing a current job prospect.</p>
<p>geezermom, I’m telling you, I can see your S running a destination inn, famous for its fabulous food and great home-brewed artisan beers. He could take gorgeous pictures for its web site and facebook page, write the copy, run the business…eventually come out with beautifully-illustrated cookbooks or style books. He wouldn’t have to actually do all the cooking himself, just manage it. I’m totally caught up in this vision for him…but then I share his trait of throwing myself into serial enthusiasms. :D</p>
<p>Re working in professional kitchens, in Kitchen Confidential, Tony Bourdain describes the kitchens HE has run as exactly what you describe, and one gets the impression that most are, but he notes that other chefs he knows run things very differently. Thomas Keller’s kitchen at The French Laundry is apparently quiet and airy, a temple of food. (Michael Ruhlman, on whom I keep harping, co-wrote The French Laundry Cookbook. I would dearly love to eat there some day.)</p>
<p>^^ I’m laughing! I’ve always loved his “serial enthusiasms.” I have an easier time seeing him as you describe than as the academic he says he might like to be. H and I also think he should try comedy writing. The French Laundry is on my list, too, along with Chez Panisse, which now seems kind of old-school. This is making me hungry.</p>
<p>@Alice
I got your PM but don’t have enough posts to PM back. I think the program is funded through participating colleges and universities, but look up Robert Noyce Teacher Scholarship Program at nsf.gov. Good luck to your 14er!</p>
<p>Geezermom, S2 has already had a taste of that! Lasted two hours at one place, though it had just opened and is trying to get lots of mover-and-shaker buzz. I noted last night they just posted on FB that they were hiring cooks, so I suspect the environment is a little volatile, shall we say? The place he is now is quite hectic, but he is liking it, they like him, and it seems a better place to start. </p>
<p>I am hoping that he will learn about managing stress, following directions precisely and organizing his work. Those (even more than the knife skills) will be useful when he goes back to Boston.</p>
<p>Just popping in from the (parents of) college class of '14 to catch a glimpse of the future. I see some fellow 2014’ers here too! This thread is both instructive and encouraging. I am impressed with what your sons and daughters have accomplished and where they are or might be heading in life.</p>
<p>The last time I posted, things were a little discouraging around our house. But a couple of days later, S landed a temp job through an agency. Last week his project ended, and they asked him to stay on as a temp “indefinitely.” This week he’ll start rotating around departments doing whatever needs to be done. I don’t want to jinx this, but it sounds promising. The pay is lower than the entry-level salary he could make, so he has to decide how long “indefinite” will work for him. The organization is in a field that interests him (economic and community development), he likes the people, and they have a history of hiring full-time staff through this agency. We’ve been hoping he’d get just this kind of opportunity to show he has the right stuff. He’s had a real spring in his step as he goes out the door every morning.</p>
<p>Sounds very promising, geezermom! And, as we all know, it is MUCH easier to find a new job when you already have one. :)</p>
<p>S heard from Columbia on Friday: not a dime. He is very realistic about job prospects and debt, and was bitterly disappointed. (The interest rates being charged graduate students are truly usurious these days, btw, since they were set in the 80s.) He has been applying for scholarships all along. The one that seems the most likely closes its applications on May 1st, and it is unknown how much he might get IF–and that’s a big if–he is one of the winners. Meanwhile, in order to hold his place he has to give Columbia a non-refundable enrollment fee of $1K on May 1st. Intensive talks this weekend!</p>
<p>We have worked out a scheme by which he could borrow from us at a much lower interest rate by our establishing a HELOC upon which he could draw only as needed, instead of committing to specific loan amounts up front through other sources. In addition, through a family member who is well connected in the NYC party scene–he’s a successful DJ and party organizer --he could probably pick up some bartending/catering shifts to help defray his living expenses. That, plus any scholarship $$ he can get, would reduce the amount of debt he would need to take on. So it is at least possible that we/he can swing it. The jury is still out. </p>
<p>Meanwhile, he hasn’t heard from the wait list school. Today was the first day they said they might notify people. He has also been applying for jobs and internships. Was rejected for one internship at a national magazine, but they said they liked his application and he should feel free to apply again. (He wonders if they say that to everyone. )There’s one with another magazine where he’s been informed he made it through the first round, but won’t know whether he is still in contention unless he is contacted for an interview. Since he’s not in this country, that is a bit challenging. Hopefully they wouldn’t pass him over because of it! If he got that, he would probably not go to J school, at least at this time.</p>
<p>From now until May 1 promises to be even more agonizing than acceptance season in 2008! At this point it looks like he is going to have to send the $1K just to keep his options open beyond May 1.</p>
<p>Ugh, that’s discouraging about the money. The HELOC sounds likes a good bet if you can swing it and he is dedicated to paying you back over time. Interest rates are still low. We would do that, I think–though it would be a true loan to our son because we’re protective of our equity and don’t want to take on debt in retirement. Fingers crossed for May 1.</p>
<p>S is very concerned that this not represent a financial hardship for us now or in the future. His first reaction was to question that, rather than leap at it, something that I consider encouraging. :)</p>
<p>Decades ago, my parents loaned us the $$ for a down payment on our first house. We paid them interest, set up a regular payment plan, and so forth. It worked well. We would have a plan like that. At the time my mother said–and I strongly agree–that it is essential to have a regular payment plan, even if it is $10 a week. “Pay us back when you can afford it” is a recipe for disaster in too many cases.</p>
<p>Once my son decides when he’ll go to grad school, we would also consider lending him some money, but I agree it’s best to set it up as a loan with a regular payment plan. DH had an uncle lend him some money for dental school and I remember writing monthly checks to that uncle after we were married until it was paid off.</p>
<p>My son is still at the same job he’s had since graduation. He’s not sure when he’ll go to grad school or even what he wants to get his degree in. He works at a think tank involved in budget and economic issues. S always assumed he’d get a MPP, but now he’s wondering if he’d be better off getting a MA in economics if he plans to continue focusing on budget, tax, etc. issues. Better he have a good idea of what he wants to study than rush back into grad school.</p>
)There’s one with another magazine where he’s been informed he made it through the first round, but won’t know whether he is still in contention unless he is contacted for an interview. Since he’s not in this country, that is a bit challenging. Hopefully they wouldn’t pass him over because of it! If he got that, he would probably not go to J school, at least at this time.</p>