@Dolemite - just to be clear - this has nothing to do with any decision. I’m not going to suddenly force her to go to a school that my friends have heard of.
I just thought it was interesting that an innocent well-intentioned comment affected me the way it did (just a little)…
Well, my sister homeschools, and given what she reports from conversations about her currently-applying-to-college daughter with other hoomeschooling parents, I’d suggest that the prestige race isn’t limited by type of schooling at all…
@theshadow If Rose-Hulman, as the number 1 ranked undergraduate engineering program for 18 years by US News, is not considered prestigious, then I don’t know what is.
By the way, as a “mis-fit” graduate of THE most prestigious business school on earth, I can tell you I would have preferred fit any day.
I should have specified that we do not fit in with the vast majority of homeschooling families here as we homeschool for academic reasons. Most here homeschool for religious or special needs reasons. Homeschooled high schoolers are very, very uncommon in my state. Academic homeschooled high schoolers are even more uncommon.
we vacillate between prestige and is it worth spending quarter million to have the bumper sticker 
As noted before, his first admission became a shock with his classmates. Since DS is going for basic sciences premed, most school with decent research opportunities fit his criteria.
I don’t remember who it was that was looking for schools with good gaming programs, but I came upon one in Germany. It is taught in English and tuition-free!
fit vs. prestige: we fall firmly into the fit catogory most of the time. There have been one or two conversations lately where I have witnessed friends and relatives tear apart my D’s top choice and it hurts. D has been pretty good about it and shares her reasons - I must admit here that I had fleeting images of sharing top 10 - 20 admits that she could have but didnt’ apply. At both of those moments I was really wishing that her list was filled with more prestige – in reality, D is happy and excited about her search and her acceptances, so we are happy.
@dfbdfb Our experience is very similar to @WhereIsMyKindle. We know only 2 homeschooling families IRL where top schools were pursued. By far, local commuting schools (either CC or universities) have been the vast majority. A few have pursued state flagships (though I guess in VA, UVA could be considered pursuing an elite, somthat would raise the number to 3.) Though we really don’t know many homeschoolers who make it through high school. Most enroll in ps or Catholic schools for high school. (And that is knowing homeschoolers since 1994!)
Online, however, it is different. The only homeschoolers I connect with online are very academic families.
@RightCoaster My son was considering Engineering and it’s one of the reasons he’s ended up with the list of large public schools that he is applying to. He wasn’t sure at all what he wanted to do last year when we were looking, but something in STEM or Engineering was on the radar. Small schools just didn’t really have the programs he was looking for, particularly at his GPA. There are a few good schools like Rice & Harvey Mudd but those are out of DS’s reach.
S17 has decided on CS for now, and that’s a mixed bag. Some CS’ departments are in Engineering, some their own Department, some are in A&S. And in a few schools they are in both Engineering and A&S. (You get a different degree BS vs BA) And many small LAC’s do have CS programs, so it would have been an option. But the best programs he is applying to also have Engineering at the school.
I looked briefly at 3+2 schools. But concluded that they wouldn’t really be a good fit for my son.
Fit is king here but we aren’t a candidate for “prestige” anyway. Luckily no one around here really cares about prestige, or is bothered by schools they’ve never heard of, they actually think it’s kind of cool. The question will come down to how much is that “fit” worth in $$.
On that note, S17 was accepted at Ursinus College today, 24K merit award.
@thshadow My DD17 is at a prestigious private school that sends a full 1/3 of their graduating class to Ivies. DD has been known since she was a young girl as a very smart kid who got good grades. At this point people are approaching her and asking about where she is applying and if she has heard, usually saying things like “we can’t wait to see where you get in!” I guess they are trying to be nice but I know that everyone waits to see a fall. DD is taking 6 APs and Honors and will do so in the Spring. She is a tri-varsity athlete and a National Science Olympian. She also is up until 1 or 2 am every night doing work and is exhausted. She’s in the rat race. She has (and will) apply to Ivies and prestigious schools, she has also applied to schools like UConn, BC and U of Rochester. She will make wherever she gets in work to her benefit, although I believe her work ethic should be awarded with an admit to a prestigious school - not that my opinion matters. LOL
My oldest is a Junior at UConn and many of the private school parents have said when they find out, “Oh UConn is a good school” with that sad look on their face. I just smile while thinking, yeah F*** you, I’d like to see YOUR kid get in.
Oy. I want the sticker. Sue me.
I think we are going for a combination of fit & prestige, with son being more concerned about reputation of the CS dept while I am more concerned about the overall undergraduate experience.
If only chasing prestige, he would not have eliminated several of the Ivies from consideration, even a couple with decent CS departments. He decided the schools would not be the right fit for him.
I am reserving final judgment on the state schools as I have been a bit underwhelmed by their application processes. Hopefully the student experience is more user-friendly than the applicant experience.
I can see myself struggling if the decision came down to say GT vs Cornell. (Not saying he will be admitted to either, but if that were the final decision.)
CONGRATS @RightCoaster & @eandesmom on acceptances!
@rightcoaster Has to be nice to be the calm guy at the party. They are freaking out because they are just realizing some of the things we figured out way back when it was beach weather. Congrats on the UNH acceptance.
“just the bullet points of hate…” I cannot wait to use that line!
@MACncheez Your serious doldrums are a result of this process being too long. Referring back to my comment to @rightcoaster, we’ve been hanging around here plotting lists and essay schedules since the summer.
@picklesarenice Some of the other threads are scary. When I venture over, I usually end up running back here quickly.
@STEM2017 good luck on the scholarship!
This is my favorite statement on CC of the past week. Thanks for this.
Fit vs. prestige -
Can I vote for both?
@LoveTheBard – I think I voted for both above, but not quite as pithily as you!
Son and I are both ‘distracted’ by prestige and fit.
I’d vote for both, too, and would say it’s sort of a multi-step process that involves some slides along the spectrum. Here, at a school similar to @cleoforshort’s, prestige is huge and competition pretty stiff. About 2/3 of the schools DS is applying to would definitely be considered prestigious. Initial visits to each of those got him excited and propelled him to research further, and they eventually made it onto his list because he saw fit potential. (Like @CT1417’s son, he eliminated some elites very quickly for a variety of reasons (some legit, eg, too rural, core curriculum, and some not so much, eg, could not stand the pretentious bowtied speaker at the info session). Because most of the schools that made it onto the app list are such lotteries however, I’m not sure he’s gotten to the point of determining which would be the absolute best fit – makes more sense to first wait and see whether any acceptances roll in from that batch. Then, if lucky enough to get there, he can cross that next bridge. Hoping not too disappointed, as the remaining 1/3 or targets/safeties so far are not that exciting to him (though I do believe he will make the most of any school he attends and will end up having a positive, productive experience at any of those).
Congrats to all on the recent acceptances – love hearing the good news roll in everyday!
** Fit vs. prestige: ** Fit defiantly… But fit is not necessarily easy to figure out.
This was a bit of a hard road for S17. He was in a program during elementary that really pushed the idea that most of his classmates would be going to prestigious schools. (And 90% of those students probably will.) His father went to prestigious schools. Took a bit of a while to get him to comfortable with the fact that there were many more schools out there in the world. He’s OK with that now…
I get bit uncomfortable when people ask because they expect him to be applying to much more prestigious schools. Based on what they remember him being like at a young kid. For me what I’m concerned is he gets into somewhere that will challenge him appropriately & he can find his tribe.
I’m all about fit but my young and immature D is more focused on prestige. I’m just glad I got her to apply to the prestige schools that actually fit. I was a bit surprised and some of the schools eliminated so I believe she has given it a lot of thought. I just hope if that she can’t attend one of her reaches she’s matured enough to be happy at whichever school she attends. I think we’ve hammered home that outcome over the last year that she’s made some kind of acceptance in her mind 