Parents of the HS Class of 2019 (Part 1)

I’m not familiar with all the details but I know a lot of students at NYU are getting grants under CARES, which is different from the (own) funds the college used to help needy students travel home/pack and ship belongings for everyone who needed it.

Thanks everyone. I guess she will see what it is when it gets here- and then she will save it toward her summer contribution since her school hasn’t released any details about if they’ll waive it this year and she’ll never make the needed money this summer.

@InfiniteWaves Congrats to your son! Love to hear good news like this–thanks so much for sharing. Looking forward to hearing all about the program as he goes through it. So nice when a bumpy start evolves, isn’t it : ) Nice and a great life lesson to hang in there.

Any student who said they had any costs associated with the COVID shutdown got a flat $500 from Mississippi State at the end of the spring semester. (There were some limits, like everywhere, but not many.) Just yesterday she got another check from the university with the memo line “CARES Act refund” for about half that. Each accredited college in the country got a formula-based amount of money that was required to go directly to students to offset the costs of the shutdown, so my guess (but it’s only a guess) is that Mississippi State didn’t get enough students claiming the money to distribute it all at the beginning of the summer, so they split it rest up amongst the students who had claimed it and that’s these most recent checks.

Now that haverford has released most of their details, my D has a week to decide how she wants to proceed for the fall, and she’s definitely torn- she said it’s a slate of bad options, really. She knows it isn’t the school’s fault though.

My D19’s classes are going online or being listed as hybrid. She’s committed to living in the dorms. She’s used to wearing a mask as she’s has to do it 8+ hrs a day for her job this summer.

I anticipate that she will have a small “bubble” of friends/study group on & off campus that she will hang out with without masking. She’s committed to doing her personal best to keep campus safe so they don’t kick everyone off-campus again. The hybrid & online class options suck compared to all in-person classes, but she & her friends understand the need to keep professors safe & everyone’s family members safe. [I am pretty sure they aren’t taking precautions just for themselves.]

I continue to feel bad for the class of 2020 (high school & college).
Her school just announced their job fair will be virtual. I wonder how many employers will be showing up (online) for that.

Hi All! I haven’t checked this particular thread for a while. I actually read the Fall Covid thread every night that @homerdog started a few months ago. That thread gains 5+ pages a night and I have had a hard time keeping up with it.

Bentley has announced their plans. All going back. However there is so much confusion! An addendum to the housing contract stating your intention to return is due mid-next week. Two town hall meetings are planned for earlier in the week literally a day or two before the addendum is due. Of course there are so many Covid rules being implemented - which I agree with. The main concern for most people is will classes will be primarily online or will they hold them with the hybrid method. Bentley has upgraded their already stellar IT in 50 classrooms - so they have the capabilities to hold them hybrid. It sounds like all will be online though if they had to be transparent but if they officially say that now then kids won’t return and of course schools need their room & board $.

And then there is the fallout of Bentley’s Class of 2020 - which my S16 is a member of. In April they announced graduation would be in person on 8/22 (limited tix) so in May there was hardly any acknowledgement from the school to the graduates - it was minimal and highly disappointing to all. Their social media coverage was lacking and we did not get our regalia sent home to us for pictures (we bought it in Feb). No one wanted a virtual graduation - so that part was acceptable - it’s just so many of my son’s friends from other universities were receiving via the mail swag packages with heartfelt goodbyes & and they got nothing. At the price we have all paid for 4 years - it was a kick in the gut to be discarded in such a manner. Cold.

Ok - so here is the kicker - 2 weeks ago the President of Bentley was terminated out of the blue. Yup. She was in the position for 2 years - she wasn’t warm and fuzzy so no one felt the loss personally just the shock. No plan for replacement yet. Then 3 days ago two emails came out from Bentley on the same day. The Class of 2020 received a cold email that graduation on 8/22 has been canceled and it will be virtual. Ok, no surprise on canceling in person - but no one wants virtual Everyone would prefer it to be rescheduled to next May like so many other universities are doing. Ok - second email of the day was to returning students - my D19- it was a real upbeat email that said all returning undergraduates are being welcomed back to school in the fall. So email #1 cancels graduation on 8/22 and email #2 welcomes 4,000 students back to campus on 8/31. Can you see the uproar? And as we are digging into the specifics of returning to campus now we can clearly see why we need that addendum filled out ASAP because they do need single occupancy in freshmen dorms and if some upperclassmen don’t pull out of housing - it will be a big hot mess.

Meanwhile Class of 2020 students have already started an online petition to reschedule graduation a year out. They have no closure. Parents are finalizing a petition of their own. What is Bentley thinking! All of these alumns are severely angry - doesn’t Bentley get that these graduates will NOT donate a dime to the university in future years nor will their parents? No way.

I should prob add that D19 is doing great this summer (for an update). She has a remote unpaid internship with 2 professors that she finds interesting. She also picked up a part time job at a local candy shoppe in Downtown Mystic. My D19 is happy to return to Bentley - even if she is locked away in her suite with her 3 closest friends

S16 is also happy enjoying a surprise summer. His full time job in Boston (associate consultant at a pharmaceutical firm) starts the first week of August. He got his full time job offer on his last day of finals in May & so that was a really wonderful day that we got to share with him in person.

Sorry about the long update …

Well - D19 should know final details of courses and accommodation next week. All classes 40 or more are online only and some smaller ones too - she has juggled her classes around to get the max in person ones she could (she hated online learning. All classes are also online for those who can’t or don’t want to travel (or end up in quarantine during term…) NYU has also confirmed that it is securing additional accommodation to be able to both reduce density in housing and accommodate everyone who should have guaranteed housing, so she’s waiting to hear her assignment next week. So we are crossing fingers it all works out as best it can.

Well, I wrote this exact post in the “virus and school thread” but thought I’d update you all here too. It was a big decision.

S19 has been on the fence for two weeks now. We are super impressed (if you can’t tell) by Bowdoin’s remote plan and are completely fine with their decision to only have freshmen on campus. I’d rather they have a smaller number on campus to try to test their protocols and be ready for spring and we hope that works out.

The bottom line for S19 is this - he chose Bowdoin because it had a very specific experience that he felt was right for him. He had other less expensive options but we agreed to Bowdoin after an amazing admitted student day where my H was sold on the experience as well. That experience does not exist right now to no fault of Bowdoin’s.

S has done the legwork. Because of some AP credits he has, he will be able to be part of convocation in May 2023 with his friends who do not defer. He will still have one semester left but can choose to do that on campus or use that last semester to study abroad. (Dreams of studying abroad for his class seem otherwise unlikely as the college class of 2023 will already have had one and a half semesters off campus and, even if they go back in spring, it won’t be in a “normal” way and students likely will not choose to spend any junior year time away.)

For this semester, he still gets to go to Maine and live with friends. Some are taking class and some are not. Come spring, if sophomores are invited to campus, he will likely go even if class is remote but we will be watching how the whole social aspect goes this fall. If track is allowed, I think he’d definitely go back. We understand that spring will still not be the original experience but it could be much closer than what fall looks like. Being off campus and remote was a deal breaker for him in the end. He’s looking at it as preserving a “real” Bowdoin experience that he will have in fall 2023.

He made his final decision this morning and will defer. Deadline for that decision is tomorrow so he waited as long as he could to make the call. He’s got enough in the works to be very productive this fall. None of us see a downside to this decision.

Definitely sounds like a well researched decision! It probably feels good to have something known and decided at this point. Now he can move forward from decision making and maybe make some great plans.

My son learned today that his closest friend in his small friend group at school has made the decision to transfer closer to home, for financial reasons. It is sad but completely understandable. I hope that somehow they can manage to see each other again.

@homerdog Sounds very thought out and mature.

Not caught up on this thread fully.

After about 10 days of being kicked off-campus due to the need to have a dedicated “Isolation” dorm, D19 has “re-secured” a spot on campus. After the plans for fall were rolled out, students filled out an intention form, and many made the decision to shift off-campus, freeing up space.

In the meantime, the deadline to apply for visiting status at GTech had passed, but not at Georgia State. GT classes are always transferable, but GSU would require some work. We applied anyway, because if Houston doesn’t look better in 3 weeks, she’s not headed there.

It’s a bit scary doing this for CS/Math, but big picture, it’s not the end of the world.

Summer class is over, and internship is going well. Things could be worse.

D graduated from her language intensive yesterday, very happy to have done it and very happy to be done. Eight credits in seven weeks was a LOT. She recently committed to being a commuter student this semester. She really thought hard about a semester off, but in the end she really wanted to take a particular class that may not be offered again, so the true decision was where would she live and how would she attend classes. That’s still up in the air. She’s applied for a studio apartment walking distance from campus on a short term lease, and is examining backup options. She will go remote from a rental farther from campus if the apartment is a bust and take her classes online. She’s gone through three potential roommates/places this week and the other parents were just never ready to commit to off campus. She has to reregister sometime in the next couple of weeks but they haven’t been told exactly when that will be yet.

@peachActuary73 So you guys have three more weeks to decide on a fall plan? Glad the internship is going well!

Denison is currently still planning to go back in a fairly normal way, although the semester will start a week early and end on November 20. Our S19 wants to go back, although because we live outside the US, he would have the option of doing all remote classes. He’s been a good sport about living on reverse time, with classes and internships in the middle of the night, but it’s starting to get old at this point. The NACAC conference announced plans to go forward with fall sports, although the schedules will be reworked so no overnight trips will be required. S19 doesn’t do XC, only track, so this won’t affect him directly, but he’s happy that athletics will be active. With the weird schedule he’s been on, he hasn’t been working out as much as usual, so now he is crunching to get back in shape. He was interviewed for a paid internship last week, so if he gets that, his schedule will go back to being strange for the last few weeks before he leaves for the US, but it’s all good experience. This opportunity arose directly because of an unpaid internship that Denison arranged through its summer accelerator program. After all, he’s had a good summer and done things he wouldn’t otherwise have tried. I’m very nervous about sending him back to Ohio - we are lucky to live in a country with a very low case rate - but we have been happy with the school so far and will trust them to do things right. (I’m on hold with Delta at the moment, trying to figure out a flight schedule, but that’s another whole mess!)

DD went down to her apartment this weekend with more stuff. She reports that the new bed is comfy so that’s good.

Last night we checked Facebook Jobs for the college town and found two she liked and applied to. She wouldn’t be starting for another month so they might not work out but it feels good to have the job search begun.

So, D was approved for the apartment for a three month lease, but we’ve decided against it as a family. The corporate website for the apartment to which she’d applied listed these tiny apartments as both furnished and including all utilities. After approval it was revealed that actually they only include a Murphy bed frame (no mattress) and also only partial utilities (no electricity). So… no. We aren’t willing to furnish an apartment for three months, just to have to deal with getting rid of the stuff. D is now examining her back up options, which include in the city near her school (but not accessible to school due to her not driving and not being willing to take public transportation), a different city on the east coast, or just changing her declaration to the school and moving to MN with us. The issue with the city house is loneliness- she can’t find a roommate despite offering to cover all the expenses herself. The problem with the one farther away is her wondering why she would bother at that point, despite being with a good friend there. She’s given herself a strict deadline of this Wednesday to decide.

@milgymfam - Can’t your D lease some basic furniture? May be a tad expensive but it beats the downside of loneliness. Or, she can purchase a couple of DIY things like a desk, chair and bookshelf online for a few hundred. That’s how we furnished our kids’ third floor walk up. Everything arrived from Amazon in a box and we just made sure the weight was ok for carrying upstairs. She’ll be able to get rid of the stuff no problem - or just leave it in the apt. for the next tenant - or sell it to them.

Gel foam mattresses can be purchased online.

@JBStillFlying the short term lease was already budget stretching (cost a good bit more than a traditional lease)- there would be nothing left to waste on furniture, and they would definitely not allow her to leave it behind. It also just struck her as incredibly wasteful to buy furniture for just three months- almost disposable furniture. I am 99% sure she’s just going to choose to alert her school to the change and travel to MN with us.

Hello, all! Thanks to everyone for the updates. I haven’t been on CC for awhile because I was making myself anxious worrying about the future when we didn’t have enough information to make decisions. Also, DH continues to work overtime on the virus so I’m often taking on all the parenting while trying to be supportive for him also.

D19 just found out that all of her classes for the fall semester will be 100% online. No in-person. (She goes to W&M). Her campus job leading adventure trips will be completely virtual (no actual activities or trips). Athletic decisions have not been announced yet, but she thinks her club sport will not happen.

According to the residence contract, no student is allowed to be in any dorm but their own. The only room you can be in is your own. No indoor gatherings. D19 has a single in a dorm with 24 students. Her friends from freshman year and her boyfriend are in nearby dorms, but they will not be able to visit each other.

D19 is worried about spending so much time alone in her dorm room. She could make plans to eat meals outside with friends, take a walk or maybe play a socially distanced game. But I figure about 80% of her life would be lived alone, especially on rainy days (there are plenty).

She is leaning towards staying home where she has a close family, close friends (who we cohort with), dogs, hobbies (gardening, yoga, hiking) and people to do them with. She can also keep participating in her sport (sailing), until it gets too cold. She would be in demand as a tutor/baby sitter for many families in our neighborhood.

We are wrapping our brains around having her home (likely for a year, as the ID doctors we know do not see a spring semester happening).

D19 was so in love with college! Thanks to everyone here for your stories and thoughts—it really helps to see the big picture and I feel less isolated.

@3SailAway I’m sorry for your daughter, it does sound lonely.

My S21 is looking at W&M, does his interview tomorrow. He was hoping to sneak up to at least go on campus this fall, sounds like that might be unlikely. But he loves it virtually!