Parents of the HS Class of 2020 (Part 1)

Parents Forum Class of 20xx Community
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@awesomepolyglot, I hear you and agree that a parent pushing you into something might take all the fun out of it and kill any chance of falling in love with it. I don’t want to push, either. I was asking for some advice on how a parent can gently guide her kid to explore and find her passion. One advice I got privately was talking to the teachers and asking them to encourage the kid rather than the parent doing it. It may seem like an obvious advice to someone, but to me it was helpful - we have very large middle school and high school in our district, and in middle school parents were asked to refrain from one-on-ones if a kid is earning B or above.

In any case, thanks for your input, I appreciate it!

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@VANURSEPRAC, it sounds like our daughters are very much alike - mine will also turn 13 in May. I so wish now she had an extra year before high school! I seriously question my decision of having her skip a grade in elementary school, even though at that time it sounded like such a great idea - she was bored academically, she felt more comfortable with kids closer to her age, etc. Nothing I can do now to “fix” that, right?

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@TypiCAmom The private suggestion sounds like a good one.

That’s somewhat odd about the one-on-ones. Would they at least reply to emails?

Another bit of advice: if the school doesn’t have any clubs DC is interested in, have them start one. The feelings of ownership and pride will stick with them. As long as it’s school appropriate (no “Drug Club,” for example), clubs can be about almost anything; at my school, there are “normal” ones like HOSA, MUN, and Science Olympiad, but there are also ones such as Linguistics Olympiad, Video Games Club, Freshman Mentor Program, and Cultural Heritage Committee. Definitely tell DC that starting something new is always an option.

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@LKnomad, thanks for replying. You raise a very interesting point. My youngest (4 years old) is just a “normal” healthy boy, but he does have one autistic tendency - he gets very uncomfortable with new environments and he can get quite stubborn in rejecting them. At his first daycare, he sat by the front door with his sack for 3 days waiting for his dad to pick him up. Was ok there afterwards. At his current preschool he amazed us by going right in and enjoying it from the first minute. At the first pool we chose private lessons (to make him more comfortable), but for 12 lessons, he would tell the coach defiantly he doesn’t want to swim - while following instructions and swimming. We switched pools, and the coach there made him comfortable by lesson 3. This fit into a pattern nicely until I decided to try gymnastics for him. The only time I could do it was during my daughter’s art classes (so I could drive them together), and due to logistics, I was limited to only one place. As I expected, my son wouldn’t try it even after observing for 2 months. Then one day my husband took the kids and being stricter than I am, practically forced my son to get on the floor and participate it (no physical abuse, I promise!). Since then, gymnastics is the highlight of my son’s week, he loves going there and is heartbroken any time we need to cancel.

Of course, it’s silly to expect the 4-year old won’t change, but up until gymnastics experience I was sure I would need to let him pick and choose his interests. After gymnastics, though, I think maybe it’s ok to push a kid (at least that young) to get his feet wet, because it’s hard to know if you might enjoy it from the sidelines.

I think the biggest difference between my kids (and again, I know it’s silly to compare 12 y.o. and 4 y.o.) is that my son doesn’t like to try many new things, but once he feels comfortable, he enjoys himself if it is the right fit, and he doesn’t care how well he does against others. My daughter, on the other end, is very afraid to try new things because she is afraid to be the worst or worse than most, and even when she gets into things, she is constantly worried about not being the best. I think maybe lack of self-confidence stops her from enjoying things, enjoying herself. And that’s probably the saddest part.

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@awesomepolyglot, I am sorry if I’ve given the wrong impression. They don’t forbid parents from talking to teachers, but only make very limited conference spaces available, and I didn’t want to take away from other parents who may need these conferences more. I met with a math teacher once, asking him to petition the administration to allow my daughter take a more advanced class. The teacher said he never does that for anyone, but promised he’ll challenge the more advanced kids. Well, all kids studied the same curriculum at the same pace, with about 1/3 bored to death (including my daughter), and so our conversation was in essence useless :frowning:

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@typiCAmom I just think it’s weird that they limit conference times. And I sympathize with your daughter; the lack of differentiation for advanced students in some areas is decidedly unfortunate.

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Hi All,
I am a newbie here. I have a D20 will be in private high school next year. She got 99.9% in her HSPT test last November, but she failed the math test at her high school this month so she will be placed in algebra 1 next year, not in geometry. I am disappointed but it is what it is.

She hasn’t taken any SAT test, and I don’t think any schools offer it here in Cincinnati Ohio. When do I have her practice for this test? and what material/textbook should I get for her? Thank you

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For SAT practice start with https://www.khanacademy.org/sat it’s free! for other SAT material make sure they are for the NEW SAT since it just changed this month, books I like are:

PWN the SAT Math Guide Fourth edition
http://www.amazon./PWN-SAT-Guide-Mike-McClenathan/dp/1523963573

The Critical Reader second edition
http://www.amazon.com/Critical-Reader-2nd-Erica-Meltzer/dp/1515182061/

The Ultimate Guide to SAT Grammar 3rd edition
http://www.amazon.com/3rd-Ultimate-Guide-SAT-Grammar/dp/1511944137/

There are other good books out there but these have worked the best for my kids, DS20 is my third and I am obsessed with PSAT prep for National Merit!

There are several High Schools that give the SAT in Cincinnati, it’s also given at the University of Cincinnati. You need to have your D make a College Board Account when she registers for the SAT she can pick a testing location that’s the most convenient. You may want to register a few months early to get the testing location you want some locations fill up fast. You really don’t need to worry about the SAT for a while, most kids take it early in 11th grade.

You should however find out if your school administers the PSAT 8/9, PSAT 10 and the PSAT/NMSQT, these test you need to register directly with the testing location. Scores on these test will give you a good idea on what your child needs to work on for the SAT. National Merit (which can mean a full ride to some colleges) is only based on the PSAT/NMSQT taken in October of 11th grade. Unlike the SAT the PSAT(s) are only given one time a year and dates can vary by testing location.

You may have to goggle around for where homeschool and private school kids take the PSAT in your area if you school doesn’t offer these. We live near a large school district that offers PSAT testing for homeschoolers and private school kids and that where my kids took the PSAT before they were in public school.

When to start practicing for these test is very debatable, it depends on where your child is academically and how much prep they need.

My kids are required to take the PSAT/NMSQT in October of 8th grade for application to an out of district high school so August before 8th grade they take a local prep class, they are all homeschooled up to this point so they have zero standardized testing experience and need to learn things like how to color in the bubbles!

9th grade we don’t do any testing, they are too busy learning how to deal with high school.

10th grade they take the PSAT/NMSQT for practice based on those scores they self prep over Christmas Break and take the SAT March (I would not recommend your daughter to take the SAT in 10th grade as she won’t have had enough math yet) Our school also started giving the PSAT 10 in late February.

Summer before 11th grade they do serious prep work to get ready for the PSAT/NMSQT and take the SAT again that fall and are done with SAT testing before they are slammed with AP testing in the Spring.

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Thanks @3scoutsmom for your response. This is my first child so I have no clues when/how to prepare her for these tests.

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Regarding testing…All of my kids used Princeton Review for SAT prep. Some did the classroom, one did online. All of them got good results and ended up being very happy with their scores. They also found that the SAT prep helped with the ACT prep (even the old SAT prep…probably more relevant now). My kids did the prep during sophomore year. Took the spring SAT during sophomore year and then again some time during junior year whenever it fit into their busy schedules. The goal was to finish all standardized testing by the end of junior year so that they could concentrate on AP exams, SAT subject tests and college applications.

Formal instruction worked for my kids, but you could easily do this on your own with prep books as long as the student remains motivated to do the work.

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@Felicita I agree, you need to plan to take the tests when it fits into your kids schedule. Once you know when you’re taking a test you’ll know when you need to prep for it. Some of the best advice I ever got was about test planning. Many of these tests need to be registered for well in advance. Keep in mind that some tests are only offered once a year, some are during the school day others are on weekends, you can’t take SAT subject tests on the same day you take the regular sat test.

Lay out your school’s calendar, and compare it to the dates for the tests your child plans to take. Look for when you kid might have conflicts with finals and AP’s. If she plays a seasonal sport you might want to consider that too, look at your family travel plans and them look at all the test dates and plug in the ones that work best for your family, making sure you’ll have test scores back in time for college applications and time to retake the SAT/ACT as needed. If you are going to take subject SAT test (not all schools require them) the you should plan to take the subject area SAT as soon after the student completes the related subject in school. For example my DS18 will finish AP Physics 1/2 and Pre Cal this year but he wanted to take the SAT and will be on an exchange program in June. There are no SATs given in April so he took the March SAT and will take the May SAT subject test for Math 2 and Physics. Studying for the Physics AP test in April will help prepare him for the SAT subject tests.

Here’ a link with SAT test dates, scroll down for projected test dates:

https://collegereadiness.collegeboard.org/sat/register/dates-deadlines

Also consider the costs. PSAT and AP exam fees can vary by school. Here we pay $25 for PSATs (which is higher than neighboring districts) and AP’s are $90 each SAT is $43.00 w/o essay and 54.50 with essay $72 for two subject tests.

This year I’ve paid $720 in AP test fees, $75 in PSAT fees $128.50 in SAT fees. That’s edging toward $1k just in test fees for College Board testing for my 3 kids. At least I’ve made good use of the free score sends and haven’t had to pay the $11.25 per college score report fee yet. Can you tell I have no love for the College Board;-)

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Just one word of caution. Timing is everything when presenting test prep materials to your child. You’ll want to avoid burnout and resentment! If your kids’ schools offer some kind of prep, encourage them to sign up early - sophomore year, earlier if your kid is motivated (mine were not). Group prepping helps initially but when they get their baseline scores, it may be time for some individualized instruction.

In our case, DS (now a college grad) was in a fabulous class that prepped for PSAT/SAT beginning in 9th grade. If I had done that at home, he would’ve outright rejected it. DD (college sr.), two years younger, did reject any kind of prep (she wasn’t in that class) until the fall of her junior yr. She had taken the PSAT and ACT cold and scored decently. At the time, she thought she wanted to apply to an Ivy so she needed to raise it. She worked with a private tutor who helped her raise her ACT score by 5-7 points (I can’t remember.) For DD, test taking strategy was best learned from a private tutor who could give her immediate feedback. Four years later, she was getting ready for the LSAT and I have to say, she was more receptive to long term prepping.

Also, the SAT was better suited for our S and the ACT was for our D.

As for fees, I agree with 3scoutsmom, they will add up! But it could have saved us $$ in college tuition when DS received college credit for 4 AP classes. He chose to stay in for the full 4 yrs. DD also could have graduated one semester early but opted to stay to play her sport.

It will be interesting to see which way D’20 goes. She’s bright but very laid back.

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Hello all. I can’t believe this thread is already here, my son (2020) thinks I am crazy for talking to him about college. We are coming out of eight years in a small private school to go to huge public HS next year. But my daughter '16 loved it and S’20 is looking forward to the move. I do feel better informed the second time around - but my children are very different. Daughter is on academic scholarship and got in everywhere she applied, while son might set his sights a little lower. Standardized test are not his strong suit and I don’t think I will be pushing him to start SAT/ACT too early. And I agree with @MuggleMom I plan to let this one be a kid and try to lower the stress level, and let him enjoy HS, he will be taking band and possibly even weight training. His sister did the IB program, he will not be going that path. As much as I stressed out last year I did learn that they all find their own path and it all works out - fit wise - now the money is a different matter, that does take planning. I look forward to getting to know everyone.

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@SincererLove, my daughter also took the March SAT through JHU Talent search, got a good enough score for the award/access to classes, but now I am a bit stuck. Online classes sound interesting, but frankly paying $940 for a class that HS won’t recognize sounds a bit frivolous. However, if it is totally worth it, I might consider. May I ask, how did you get a scholarship from a local college to take a college class before HS? Our local community colleges let kids take classes for free, but only once they are in HS - that is, starting fall, not the summer before. Or did you get a scholarship for a JHU class? Thanks!

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Remember our kids are in 8th grade!!! While my kid did do ACT for talent search, his real testing for college didn’t start until 10th grade, and that was when he took the PSAT for the first time. He saw that his scores were in a specific range and at that time decided to study, but he had time! He took his first subject test at the end of 10th grade. He studied for the “real” PSAT in the summer between 10th and 11th grade.

Now it is time to help you children learn to study well, learn to work hard, find out what they enjoy doing in school and outside of school, and have fun. Stress will come later, trust me.

Is it really that different in a private school??

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@typiCAmom I’m impressed you got your March SAT scores back so soon. My DS18 took the SAT on March 5th and won’t have the scores until May 10th! Does JHU do their own scoring?

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Hi all,

Looking for some advice on 9th grade courseload, since my daughter just got her placement back. She aced placement tests, and hereis what she’s been given:

  1. Advanced English I (the only alternative is a regular English class)
  2. Biology (the only alternative is Bio for Biotech Track, my daughter is more interested in Media and Arts Track)
  3. World History (no alternative)
  4. PE
  5. Algebra II - my question revolves around it
  6. Elective I - Spanish II (no Honors option, only for Spanish III)
  7. Elective II (optional) - again, question see below.

Ok, so math: DD took Algebra I 7th grade, Geometry 8th grade, A’s in both. She is not enamored with sciences, but math is easy for her. She’s been taking Algebra and Geometry for the last two years at RSM, so mostly bored with math at her MS. On Jan SAT for JHU, she felt she knew the material, and did poorly (below 700) only because of general anxiety and having a flu that day. She also took March SAT and admitted it was tough due to Trig, but she could end up doing better in it than first test anyway because (hopefully) she wasn’t as stressed out. Ok, enough of background. The school also offers Algebra II with Trig, Pre-calculus and Pre-calculus H that could technically be taken in 9th grade, but usually pre-calculus is taken in 10th. DD already e-mailed the counselor asking for an appointment to discuss her course load.

Q1: Should I come along with my DD to the counselor’s appointment? Would I look like a helicopter mom? I am not sure my DD is ready to argue effective with an adult (other than her parents, LOL). But I don’t want her to look like she is hiding her mother’s back.
Q2: Would it be reasonable to ask for my daughter be placed - or at least tested for pre-calculus H? Not just because it’s the only grade-raising math class available in this HS, but because having Calculus BC in 11 grade instead of 12 would give her a spot for an extra class - the school has lots of great AP’s, but mostly for 11-12 graders. I know many here talked about missing the foundation by skipping a math grade, but my daughter has been so bored throughout her math classes at MS (despite being in advance math for 2 years and geo (considered to be advanced, but was too easy)), I just want her to be challenged for once. And we could always help her with math if she starts feeling lost.
Q3: the optional elective they offer has to be “performing arts”, either band, choir or drama. She doesn’t want to take band because she thinks she’d be worst than most, and is somewhat open to drama, but her biggest worry is that if she makes Spanish her elective for 3 years, she won’t have a chance to take all the classes required for Media and Art track - two years of journalism, Art 1, Studio Art AP, Art History AP. Ideally, she’d like to take Art History AP in 9th grade, but would settle for an Art 1 instead and take Art History down the line.

Is it even reasonable for a parent to request things if counselor says “we don’t allow this”? I tried that in 6th grade, asking for Spanish 1 as elective (two years of Spanish in our MS are counted as one year of HS Spanish), and was told that if an exception was made for 1 student, others would request that as well, and the school doesn’t have the resources. An acquaintance of mine went to school district and bullied everyone to give her DD an AP class in her freshman year (different HS, neighborhood district), but I would imagine that such a move could only alienate GC, wouldn’t it? Thanks!

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@3scoutsmom, sorry - where was my head. The scores came back for Jan 23 test. JHU offered a free Mar test for their own internal studies and we took them on their offer, but yes, I think the scores for March test only come out in May.

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Different schools have different rules, here I think you have to take art 1 before AP Art History and AP Art History is a killer class at our school. I would not skip Algebra II instead skip AP Cal AB and go directly to AP CAL BC in 11th grade, that’s the path my kids have done.

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@typiCAmom I do not understand your question about math. Are you asking if you can ask if she can skip alg2/trig and instead are pre-cal? Typically students take alg 2, pre-cal, and then cal. (The AB/BC sequence can be taken in a single yr The practice of spreading AB followed by BC over 2 yrs is really unnecessary.) I personally have not had any kids skip alg 2 or pre-cal, even though they have been strong math students. (Our current college student completed through alg 2/AoPS interemediate alg in 8th grade). With pre-cal in10th, she would still be on track for cal in11th.

The other issue about pushing too far ahead is if she doesn’t want to pursue a STEM field. Many colleges want to see at least 3 yrs of math, but some want 4, taken in high school. (Not meaning 4 yrs equivalent, but 4 yrs taken.). What will she take for the other math classes?