Kids can be such jerks sometimes.
I just found out exactly why my son has been second-guessing his Pitt plans (it’s his #1, other than a reach that he’s still waiting to hear from).
A few weeks ago, a classmate was bragging about his acceptance to Vandy to a friend. That friend was worried he wouldn’t get into his reach school.
So Vandy dude dismissively told him, “Well, you could always go to Pitt” - voice dripping in condescension.
My son said to him, “Pitt’s a good school,” and Vandy dude instantly rattled off the name of an “average” student from the prior year who went there, like that made it inferior.
So now my kid feels like he’s one of the subpar students at the school.
yep, kids can be cruel idiots, and unfortunately peer pressure is a real thing. Vandy dude’s viewpoint says more about him than Pitt, but it will take a while for kids to realize that.
I’m sorry, but the icon is just not sufficient for me as a response to a kid denigrating someone else’s choice of college. These emojis don’t encompass all my feelings, but are a better representation:
Edited to reframe my language from specifying Pitt, to any college of a kid’s choice.
Waiting on Uva (this Friday?)…then comes a maddening quite period til late March. S23 is taking it in stride…has poured himself into making the traveling squad for the volleyball team. Doesn’t quite have the timing down but the basketball hops have certainly helped. He also has a MUN trip in early March which is a welcome distraction.
Honestly denigrating any school that a kid worked to get into… it’s one thing to be a bit disappointed in not getting into a first choice and having to “settle” for yourself, but belittling someone elses choices and options is just cruel and pointless. Fortunately a lot of people grow out of that cruelty with age and experience (unfortunately it isn’t everyone).
FWIW, I think Pitt is only going to be rising in reputation. It’s a serious option for my D23 and she also has a childhood friend who was dismissive of their acceptance. (Not to her, thankfully, but to their parent). They have sights set on UMich, UNC, Purdue, etc. We are in PA so maybe there is an appeal in going away for school, but Pitt is an amazing value. Also Pitt’s Fall '22 admission rate was less than 50%.
My best friend always says, “he’ll fall down.” When someone is a jerk, that’s her way of dealing with it, and the amazing thing is that twice the jerk in question really did trip and fall down soon after. The bigger lesson for that kid will be when cool, interesting people start to not like him. I’ve seen that happening in my kid’s circles with those who boast.
Also waiting on UVA here, very much hoping for this Friday. I’ve planned a trip for Econ twin to visit UNC over President’s Day weekend. We are bringing a friend of his who was also admitted to UNC. Both boys are also waiting on Duke and UVA.
On the way home we have a hotel room in Charlottesville, I paid a little extra to cancel if neither boy gets in. My CS twin is staying home to work on robotics and then both have MUN trip and possible Econ trips. When does the slow period start?
Mid-March to end of March is going to be a mad house between both boys, I think we have 23 decisions coming in. All I know for sure is there will be lots of emotions, both sad and hopefully happy.
So sorry this happened. This is true of life – there will be jerks everywhere. Life is not fair. We talk about resilience in our household a lot. I hope your kid will see that there are many super smart kids that attend Pitt and have great outcomes.
This is also the reason I have told my kids that they are not allowed to discuss any of the colleges they applied to, accepted to, deferred from, declined by with anyone until they have made their final decisions.
When your son can hear it, it might be worth talking to him about the fact that there are people who would look down on ‘only’ getting into Vanderbilt.
Not to be shady about Vandy at all (it’s a good school!) but rather - if you live your life based on external validation…you will never actually be satisfied with any action or accomplishment because there will always be someone who will take a shot at it no matter how awesome the act or big the accomplishment.
Congratulations to your son for getting accepted to a school he is excited about! I hope he can honor his own feelings and thoughts about the great school he may attend rather than listening to a naysayer he probably won’t even be talking to next year.
Not to mention that most Americans pay little attention to USN or similar rankings and “going to Vandy” will unlikely get you many second looks at dinner parties. So not as much of a bragging right as this kid thinks it is.
My D19 had Pitt as her #1 choice. The money worked out better for her to go to MiamiOH. She made the adult choice to go to Miami and has loved it for the most part. Hey nothing is perfect(one bad roommate).
The choice on where a student goes to school has too many factors to rely on just some US News ranking. Which we all know those rankings aren’t perfect by any means.
My D23 recently got into UW-Mad. She probably won’t get any money. So we would have to mortgage her future to attend. No thanks. I will be happy she will go to a school that will meet all her needs and one of them being financial.
It’s not only kids. I recall one of D18’s teachers asked her why she’d applied to Chapman, “that’s a school for B students” (D had applied for dance, though she didn’t attend).
icon is just not sufficient for me as a response to a kid denigrating someone else’s choice of college. These emojis don’t encompass all my feelings, but are a better representation: 
