I agree! Once we toured my daughter’s original #1, she didn’t love it. And she’s explored many options and changed her mind about a lot in the last year or so…distance, size, vibe, major…It’s a rollercoaster! The school she’s ending up at is one in our backyard that we never thought we could afford. It wasn’t even on her radar until maybe 9 months ago, and now it’s the absolute perfect fit and I couldn’t be more excited for her. They end up where they belong! Good luck to all!
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My kid’s first dream was WUSTL, then Purdue, and he ended up at Alabama. The dream changed when he saw he’d have his own room in the dorm and a shared bathroom with one kid - which was one kid too many - but better than communal 
My daughter top choice was American - til she visited Charleston. She had Miami Ohio and Elon super high - til we visited and she didn’t. Kids change. For the record, I loved both Miami Oho and Elon and don’t love Charleston
For parents out there - never fall in love. And visiting a place and not liking it is as good as visiting a place and liking it!!!
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Yes! Although I view it less as they end where they are supposed to be, but more - you will bloom and thrive wherever you are planted -.
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Yes! I like this better than my “the end up where they belong”. Great way to put it!
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I hope you are able to talk kid around this feeling that it was all for nothing? Will share that in my D’s friend group we are seeing a lot of shifts, shutouts, and surprises with our state flagship and the ones in neighboring states. Kids that should have been in with merit according to naviance and school websites have been rejected, deferred, maybe accepted but with no merit. My own kid was not an A student, did not have competitive SAT scores - our flagship was never an option for her to apply. So even if your kid had been able to take it easier and not get all of the A’s, not do all of the things (and I say able to not because I think most high achieving kids can’t help themselves from doing their best) - B’s and low key activities don’t seem to be getting into the flagships around here.
Also seeing anecdotally that admissions to selective privates don’t seem as crazy/off-kilter as the big state schools. I just can’t imagine the process at universities that are getting 100k plus applications. The sorting hat cannot hold…
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And don’t buy the sweatshirt. 
I’m kidding. I knew when I bought the sweatshirt I’d wear it even if kid was rejected. 23 still wears shirts from schools that rejected, too.
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It’s funny - when you’re on a college campus, you always see others. At Charleston, my last trip, I saw Gtown and Temple. Yesterday I was in Tuscaloosa - and I saw an Ole Miss - but they might have been there for a sporting event. And an Ohio State.
My daughter has a W&M T Shirt - and my better half an OU t-shirt - from our visit to Oklahoma.
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Congratulations on having likable options 
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Hi. It’s my first post here. I’m struggling with some sadness on my daughter’s behalf but I’m trying to hide it from her because I don’t want her to feel any worse. She’s only gotten into her 3 safety schools at this point, and she’s fortunately gotten partial merit scholarships at them, but she doesn’t feel good about any of them.
She’s been rejected from all of her target schools and has three reach schools yet to hear from, and it’s just been so crushing for her. She has excellent grades (4.6 W, only one B in APUSH one semester), is in the top 2% of her class at a large public school, good SATs (which she submitted when she was in the middle 50 and went test optional when she wasn’t), rigorous coursework (6 APs and every honors class available), and excellent essays, but none of it was enough this year, and I’m feeling so down on her behalf.
I can’t help feeling like I failed her somehow, letting her apply to so many places and have big dreams of attending a mid-sized university and have that classic collegiate experience, when that just isn’t in the cards, apparently.
Is it always this hard? Or is this year worse somehow?
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What schools did she apply to and for what majors? What are her stats (GPA/standardized test scores/rank)?
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Accepted CU Boulder (in state), DePaul, and UMass-Amherst. Waitlisted Loyola Marymount (even though her stats are a good but higher than their averages, and she wrote really fantastic essays, too). Rejected USC, Middlebury, Northwestern. Waiting on Michigan, Vassar, and Brown (the latter was her shot in the dark). Sigh.
I added some of her stats to my original post. She is applying as an English major and plans to double major in another humanities subject.
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I just wanted to say how sorry I am. Seeing our kids sad or upset is the worst [[hugs]].
I found it easy to find safety/likely schools and reach/rejective schools. The target schools were very hard to identify and seems very unpredictable this year.
Are there good things about the 3 schools that she got into? Honors programs? Locations? They must have been chosen for some reason originally. And congrats to her on the merit!
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Not that it helps but your kid is definitely not alone. Exact same situation here. He feels it was all for nothing.
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I’m with you.
This is my 3rd kid to go through the process - high stats/highly qualified applicant and it’s heartbreaking. It’s insane this year.
I’m furious and heartbroken for them.
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Thanks for sharing that. That’s how she feels, too.
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It is heartbreaking. I’m sorry you are in the same boat
8 waiting lists, it’s almost comical when we can step away from it. 
some last-minute things came through that gave some relief, but she still feels like she would have had more choices in another year.
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It may be too late but have you considered Iowa? it’s top 10 English - but not a hard admit (not sure about English). You can apply til May 1 but have missed the merit deadline.
Truman State would be a mid size but not in a city like yours. UAH is one you can still get into and get that college experience - although no football, etc. But it’s in society.
CU Boulder and UMASS are the classic school experience - but your list isn’t all mid size - although they’re not tremendously huge either vs. others.
I’m not sure you were off - schools like LMU have a lot of facets - including ability to pay, demonstrated interest and more. And she got into similar Depaul - ok, not at the ocean but similar in many ways.
She got into three - and got merit - so in no way did you let her down.
Here’s a little secret - kids can be happy at TONS OF SCHOOLS. That’s up to them. At the same time, every year we read about kids who go to their dream school and are miserable - wehther it’s a bad roomie, bad food, bad prof, can’t join clubs, just aren’t finding their way.
She should be proud and it will be ok - but the application season also isn’t over. And your daughter still has the ability of following her dream - and that’s in part due to you.
Head high.
Best of luck -
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Thank you. Yes, we are going to make some pro-con lists in the coming week and try to start falling in love with the schools she was accepted to. She was admitted into the honors colleges at CU and DePaul, not at UMass but can apply after her first semester, and she got enough merit to offset the out of state cost. I’d secretly love for her to stay in state because she’ll be close by and it’s the most affordable, but I’ll support her either way because I know she wants to have a different experience.
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8 waiting lists?! That’s insane. It’s like playing the powerball this year or something!
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