Parents of the HS Class of 2023 (Part 1)

Parents Forum Class of 20xx Community
9525

The FAFSA changes at this point will take effect with the FAFSA filed for the 24-25 college year. The whole form is changed and some important details, including the multiple kids in college “discount”, are being changed.

I wonder how this application year’s aid packages, especially at need based only schools, will change next year for families with multiple kids in school. This includes my family and I am concerned. One school my son was accepted to proposed a too-good-to-be-true package, even if only for the 2 years my older son will be in college. I don’t know if that 2 year timeframe is real now.

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9526

THIS x 5 million!!! I am drilling this into S24’s head- if you wouldn’t be excited to go there, do not waste time and money applying. It may be the ONLY place you get in and you need to be happy to go there. His cousin is dealing with this now- denied from all but three safeties and now she doesn’t like any of them.

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9527

The admissions process is brutal and broken in a lot of ways. There needs to be more transparency. The universities all have an idea of how they want their classes to shape up- first gen kids, unrepresented minority kids, legacies, etc. What I have seen is that this is resulting in high stat, smart kids who could do the work not being accepted because they don’t have a compelling story or didn’t go to a private school or boarding school with hooks. Life isn’t fair, but would be easier for the shutout kids to take their medicine is there was more transparency in the process.

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9528

Could you please help me understand the decision day process. Once a student commits to a school either on May 1 or before, does he/she need to officially decline all their other college acceptances or do the schools automatically mark them as declined if they have not committed by May 1? Also, if the student has a change of heart after committing to a school, what are their options, considering they had to decline their other acceptances by then? TIA

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9529

Don’t need to officially decline the others. They go away after the acceptance deadline. In any case it is just a click on their website. Change of heart won’t work.

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9530

This is an acute observation.

I mean, if there are institutional priorities that are so central to the admissions decisions, and the AOs use this as a blanket reason for their choices, why not give an idea from year to year in August?

“We are especially looking for males this year, have musical openings in blank, blank, and blank, need more Philosophy majors, and we are looking for 30% of the class to be first gen… etc. so take that into account before you apply.”

If they really know this information, they could give an outline. Instead they give ranges of GPAs and test scores and say “we are looking for intellectually curious leaders.” Well, who isn’t? Telling only average GPAs and ACT/SATs now that so many don’t care about tests and GPAs are so complicated in their calculations and comparisons means that schools are able to give basically NO information about what they are looking for whereas students have to basically write an apologia for their lives for each school!

It used to seem more balanced in knowledge and power on each side than it does now.

PS- This isn’t really a factor for my son in particular, but that is partly because with the chaos of modern admissions, we just kind of opted out of the more competitves except for two reach schools he understood were lottery schools.

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9531

Yes, my D rents all her books in her school and they are not cheap

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9532

Thank you. This is helpful to know.

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9533

If you can, please name the FASFA only school. I am looking for them.

9534

Most I know are small LACs. So I know of Benedictine College in Kansas and University of Dallas, but maybe also Hope, etc. They are often religious.
If it is a non-custodial parents situation (which we have) a few elites don’t look at NCP every time- Princeton and Vanderbilt.
But… FAFSA is about to change the custodial parent rules some, which could make a difference.

Now I am off for a 12 hour drive to see my husband. Fun :rofl:

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9535

I agree that it would be great if there was more transparency in the admissions process. As far as high stats kids who could do the work not being accepted, unfortunately a lot of it comes down to a numbers game – the schools have far more qualified candidates than they have space for them, hooks or no hooks.

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9536

Having gone through this with 3 kids of my own and following through their peers and the kids of my friends, the last part of this is not an outcome you can guarantee or engineer. Some kids simply will not get excited about schools that meet the other criteria for a safety (virtually guaranteed admission and affordability). It would be great if they did, and certainly some kids do. But it’s not like if a kid doesn’t their parents somehow blew it and should have tried harder to find that perfect gem of a safety their kids loved.

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9537

This was my fourth go round with college admissions and each of my kids had different circumstances, though my oldest and youngest are probably most similar in terms of academics, ECs and interests (my second was a recruited athlete and third has some learning disabilities). This time around I had a good sense of the process.

Going by her stats, most of the schools on D23’s list are what would be considered “safeties” with high acceptance rates. She also applied to two “likelies” and two reaches (one of the reaches is a match in terms of her app but a reach due its low acceptance rate).

We actually sort of focused on high acceptance rate schools b/c we knew she would likely get the top tier merit awards as well as qualify for their honors programs. Prestige is great for those who can afford to be full pay, but paying for four kids in college meant we needed to chase merit (less than six years age difference b/w our oldest and youngest).

She knew going in the reaches would probably be unlikely in the off chance she got in b/c most likely they would not be what we considered affordable. From her remaining list, her top two favorites were one of the “safeties” and one of the “likelies.” In the end, she got into both but the “likely” which happens to be my alma mater, came in at $20K more per year than the safety.

She and my husband just got back from a weekend visiting the top choice safety for a second time. She interviewed for full tuition scholarship which she has a slim to none chance of getting, attended a dinner for kids accepted to honors program and ended the weekend attending the “accepted students” day. Fortunately, she arrived home still excited about the school and plans to attend.

At one point when her classmates started announcing their acceptances from some higher ranked schools, she made a comment like, “all that hard work and stress in high school to do well and I’m going to a school with a 70% acceptance rate - I could have taken easier classes!” (She is one of seven students doing the full IB diploma at her high school). I reminded her that 1) she loved the universities she visited 2) no debt is more important than prestige 3) she likely would not have gotten as much merit and possibly not gotten invited to the honors program had she taken the less rigorous high school course load.

A small part of me is sad that her other top choice did not make financial sense - it is my alma mater and a great fit for her as well, but in the grand scheme of things not worth the extra $20K/year (even tho it is higher ranked, and more well known where we live than the other schools where she was accepted). All of the schools she applied to, except her two reaches and an in-state public, are Jesuit schools.

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9538

Follow the schools on social media. It is very easy to see what their institutional priorities are in advance of applying. It’s not just about getting accepted- but being able to exceed there. And if you going to be looked passed due to institutional priorities, it’s not worth attending- as you’ll continually be passed over.

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9539

In fairness to the schools, they do show who they want - and it’s encumbent upon the student to realize all of the factors.

With digging, it’s not that hard to find a balanced list.I see too many kids “assuming” and then being appalled they didn’t get in.

Some schools are auto admit or admit 90% - you know you’re gettin in.

Others fill a zillion percent of their class ED - so you know, even if you beat the stats, it’s hard.

Some want demonstrated interest galore - to the point of ad nauesum. Did you open all the emails, play all the videos?

Some want certain ethnicities or genders or religions.

Some want athletes.

I mean, it’s really not that hard.

But too many people make the wrong assumptions:

  1. My stats are there - I’m in (it depends on the school).

  2. My essays are great; everyone tells me. That’s great - but it’s subjective, did the reader tell you?

  3. My LOR is great - your teacher may like you but it doesn’t mean it’s great - how do you know what they wrote? Heck, some people don’t even get the teachers that they specifically request - and deliver LORs from the wrong people.

  4. My awards were great - did they convey what you did? Being named the High School Ambassador Award in and of iteself means nothing - and no awards are fine btw.

  5. I cured cancer or started a club with 10,000 members. Yeah, and they don’t believe you unless you showed proof - and rightfully so - or all diseases would have been eradicated by now and every kid in American would be CEO of a non profit - and some kids claim they did 5 things like this (for real).

  6. I’m from a certain place - they should want me - depends on the school and some are changing the “where” they want them from and they’re upfront about it.

  7. I have no money - they should admit me and pay for me to come - hmmmm - not most privates who do care about how much money you have.

  8. I got in to all the schools I applied - but I can’t go - because they didn’t offer me what they said they would.

Good luck to everyone - but for those getting shut out, you mis planned.

For those not getting into reaches and getting made about it - note they are reaches. You even noted that when you applied.

For those who can’t afford where they got in, you misplanned.

I’m not buying the - it’s impossible to plan, schools aren’t transparent - line.

When you buy a house, don’t you visit them all - and buy the best one for you - whether the nicest kitchen or best school district. That’s what the school is doing - they want to see - is anyone better for them than you.

Time to plan better.

Not trying to be harsh - but it’s the reality.

There’s a zillion people out there that don’t seem to have this issue.

Sometimes you have to settle for what you don’t want - or at least plan to settle for what you don’t want.

It’s how it is. Education is mostly a commodity - and there are many equal places from a quality POV to consume it. In many cases, you can have access at an Outback level and cost but at a Flemings or Ruth Chris quality.

You just have to step into the door. One door.

If you apply to 10 and get into one affordable one that you can love - guess what, that’s all you can consume anyway - be happy!!!

Good luck to future applicants.

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9540

It is only common courtesy to decline any school acceptances that you do not plan to enroll in. Some schools allow you decline in the student portals and some just ask to send an email.

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9541

Maybe because I went through the circus once in 21 and now in 23, I was able to make the process relatively pain free for my DS23.

If you apply to the same 50 colleges everyone applies to that is considered prestigious then for doughnut hole families, the most likely outcome is rejection or WL (soft rejection). If you really want one of those LACs that are considered prestigious, YOU MUST ED.

As far as WL goes, these colleges have ZERO incentive in picking kids that cannot pay full price or close to it. They already got their target students and if they must dip into the WL pool, they will >99% select those that will help the college’s revenue target. These colleges all know what their yields are going to be, even with high number of applications.

This is really not an indictment on our kids, but it is very much on US. They are kids! We should know better. The most delusional group of parents are those COA $30-40K that think their unhooked, 35+/1500+ standard strong kid has a fair shot at getting into one of these schools where ~50% of the kids are TO and full pay. And it will only get worse.

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9542

1 May: Judging from my older kids’ experiences, they don’t all just go away after the national decision date—a handful play a bit loose with the 1 May deadline, under the guise of “Hey, maybe the student just forgot to accept one”. Those tend to be rolling-admissions places that have final application deadlines after 1 May, and it shouldn’t be relied upon, but still.

FAFSA-only colleges: It’s most of them. The easiest way to find them is to go to list of colleges that use the CSS and if it isn’t on that list, then you’re good.

Colleges “building” a class: I would suggest that, for those colleges that “build a class” via their admissions decisions, that they don’t really know themselves when the process starts, and in fact might not even know at the end. With some few exceptions (possibly places like, e.g., Olin College of Engineering), the crafting of the class is an emergent process, not a thoroughly thought-out one.

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9543

I am pretty sure Xavier still is, we are still getting info from them about applying. A lot of second-tier state schools will accept applications through the summer.

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9544

You are right that the ability to do binding ED makes a large difference at a number of schools. It means you have money, and you are prepared to commit – i.e., the kid doesn’t think that s/he is tippy toppy and feels compelled to try for the tippy top EA schools. This is really a risk management exercise even if you are prepared to pay full price.

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