At that age (7th grade?), feels like he could miss a few days of school. When we moved our oldest into his college in LA (about a 6 hour drive), we brought the 4th grader who could stand to miss things but left the 11th grader behind because that one really had activities of importance. And it was important for the little one to see where her big brother would be after he left home. This year she’ll be in 6th grade when we move her sister in, and the plan will be to have her come along.
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I’ve already been telling my kids to make sure their roommates know they’re invited for thanksgiving etc if they can’t get home. But I’ll have them look out for others as well. I would have never thought about parent’s weekend.
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Wonder if there’s a thread for empty nesters?!
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My daughter pretty much told us not to bother - to her that was nothing special about that particular weekend. We DID visit her some other time, when she felt it was a good time.
Everyone is different, first off. But I’m a proponent of missing a day or two of school for something interesting or important, as long as my son isn’t behind in his classes.
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Parent of C21 here. S24 was in school (mandatory grade retreat) when we moved them in, so, Mom went for move-in, which actually was in the end a good call. Dad was very emotional at the drop-off at the airport 
. It was also a pretty chill vibe with just the two of us, and no little brother in the mix. And my DH was happy not to have gone to Target/Trader Joes/Container Store/etc/etc/etc over a three day period. It was also less stressful for my C21 as they’d never been on the campus before and didn’t have to worry about anyone in the family embarrassing them. Oh and since many of the dorm rooms are SO small, all 4 of us would have barely fit anyway.
And parents weekend was only 6 weeks away, so we all schlepped back for that. At that point, it was great because C21 could proudly show us all around “their college” and not be nervous because they’d gotten used to the campus in the first few weeks. And they got to introduce little brother (whom their new friends had all heard about). Win, win.
Fast forward to move in the next year, it worked out so well the first time, we did it again. It was mom and C21 bonding and the rest recently visited for S24’s college visits. Just one way to do it.
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We did the accepted students day at WPI today. There were lots of things to really like. The school seems to be really investing in first year support for students to help them acclimate to college, make connections, and get connected to support resources. Everyone we met seemed very friendly and helpful and happy. My son loves that they have a Student Rock Association, which basically exists to help students find other people to make rock bands with. Of course there were all the positives about the school that made my son want to apply in the first place (project based learning, medium size, quarter system, lots of sci/math people).
The food was pretty terrible, and it also was terrible at the Fall Open House, so we’re considering it is just terrible all the time. I didn’t love the Fin Aid Office’s very clear message that they will reassess your financial aid every year but the only possible outcome is you will get less aid, you will never get more. (Someone asked if their child’s sibling currently in college graduated, would Fin Aid change; they said student would get less Fin Aid. Someone asked if they would get more Fin Aid when younger sibling started college; they said no. It was the same for other questions about financial changes, such as change in assets: Aid can go down but not up. 
)
Somehow, S23 didn’t feel like the school “clicked” as much as BU did last week. He is trying to figure out now if that is just because he was a bit tired today, or because there was way more social interaction today which he enjoys but finds draining, or something else. He has a few weeks to make his decision. 
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School was always a secondary item to family. My children missed school for any important family event and I’d include child going away to college an important family event. I mean I can understand if a child would miss some important school related event like a competition for an extra curricular but just a normal school day - that can always be caught up.
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I love this thread, I don’t visit all day and 43 new posts!
We have two admitted student visits planned for the next two weekends. It’s complicated and lots of driving as D23 is at boarding school 8 hours from home. Hubby is taking this weekend to go pick her up and go to Colgate Saturday. I am taking the next weekend to pick her up and go to Hamilton. I get the better weekend as it’s family weekend at BS so i get to see her dance performance before we go visit the college. I am hoping the visits provide a clear answer as to which is her best fit. We have not been to either one.
Graduation invitations were sent out last week, and she asked me to email her videos and pics of her as a little kid for her senior dance showcase. They project the videos behind them on a giant screen during the senior solos. I can’t believe she has been there 2 years, it has gone by in a blink. I feel like college will be an easy transition for all of us since she went away 2 years ago. The hardest part for her will be having a roommate as her BS has singles.
Has anyone on here with a ‘23 had their child commit to either Colgate or Hamilton?
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My D’23 and S’23 are at two different boarding schools, so we are going to have to divide and conquer for graduation. We will also have to divide and conquer for college move in (CO and NY) and family weekend. I dread having to pick who goes where. 
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D23 hasn’t committed, but we loved our Colgate visit last week. We had a small tour (just 2 admitted students, 2 moms and the guide) and the tour was tailored to the students’ interests. It is a gorgeous campus with a lot going on. I’m hoping he chooses it.
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Hi. Yes - our DS committed to Cogate '23. He is super excited (sometimes i think he’s just as much excited to have made a decision and to not have to talk to me about colleges!). At Colgate we did the official tour, hung around the town, ate lunch and dinner there. At Hamilton, no official tour as they were only touring admitted students that week. We instead met with a current student (alum of his high school) who walk us around and also had another student (son of a friend) meet us. One student was a very serious pre-med kid and the other was an art student who was also an athlete…so pretty different kids who both were enjoying their time at Hamilton. Ultimately DS23 felt it wasn’t the right fit at Hamilton and didn’t apply but loved Colgate and applied ED1. As you’ve read, there are plenty of folks on these threads who would do the opposite.
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It does seem that people feel strongly about one or the other. Since we didn’t visit prior to applying, I wonder how she will feel. I bet if we had visited before, she may have not applied to one of them.
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Yes! She is going to the University of Rhode Island! It came from behind right at the end. I will do a full write up as soon as I can with all the details to help future families. And also in gratitude for all the help and support received from this wonderful community! We are very excited!
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In this case, it was someone who wanted to finish in 3 years…
But yes, your thoughts make sense!
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The intent of “soft” was not easier. It was intended like “non-quant”. Poor phrasing, agreed.
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We have some movement!
After not even talking to S23 about decisions for several weeks because he seemed overwhelmed and upset by it all, I made a chart with some things he cares about for our final three. Days of sun, days of precipitation, percentage of people in his faith group, distance to family, flexibility of major, and so on. He looked at the chart and decided to cut Alabama, which was the right choice for him. (Again, it is my alma mater, and I will always love it and my Bama car magnet and Tide football, but for him, it was not the right place for right now.) S23 tends to be oppositional by nature, so it had to be his decision.
We are now down to Baylor, which he really liked at the visit for a scholarship competition, and a small Catholic LAC, which all the adults favor but which he felt was too much the same as high school. The LAC didn’t give him any money from a scholarship weekend after the disastrous interview where he had two female coaches as his faculty interviewers. He felt slighted by them as he far above their average test scores etc. there. He does have a fairly large merit scholarship there, and it is a less expensive school by far just at sticker price, but it is tough when you feel the school didn’t appreciate you.
Baylor had already given him $27,000 a year merit from the applications, he was accepted into a specialty Business major he really liked with lots of flexibility to double or triple major, and he loved the visit there. He did not get any more merit from the Faculty scholarship competition, which had almost 1000 people competing over two weekends/one virtual weekend for a limited number of additional scholarships. Nonetheless, he decided to put down the enrollment deposit. (We already lost money with the Bama enrollment deposit which we had to put down to get on the housing list, which really angers me since it basically says if you have money, you can be first in the housing line by committing early and just losing it later, but I digress.) We needed to put this enrollment deposit down to sign him up for orientation this month before the final deadlines for enrollment.
That is exciting enough news to me because he is actually making some decisions rather than totally frozen like he has been. Then, tonight he got a surprise email that he got an additional $5000 a year for the Faculty Scholarship from I2E weekend at Baylor! I do not know if it is because we put down the enrollment deposit yesterday or if it is just coincidence and someone ahead of him in the winners list turned them down, so he moved up into the lowest level award. (Faculty awards are from $5000-$20000 a year.) It is exciting in any case!
I think it helped him feel better about cutting off the Alabama possibility which was financially the best as a Rural Scholar and alumni scholar. Baylor has just shown him a lot of love at every turn. It is his most expensive option (he only applied to 6), but he can cover it with his 529, and what he needs is to be excited about an option so that he mentally and emotionally can handle the transition. I’m still hoping for a change to the LAC, as are all the adults in his life, but my plan is to support his choice, which is made easier because I think Baylor was the second-best of his options, so it is easy to support!
We had totally given up hope on any more money from them!
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PREACH!!!
The number of ways, large and small, so many colleges—even colleges like the University of Alabama, which has as its mission service to the citizens of one of the most impoverished states in the union—put up barriers to the poor is nothing short of obnoxious.
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Love reading these updates and decisions! I mentioned that Case Western gave us a boost in financial aid so the needle is definitely moving in the CWRU direction since it’s suddenly within budget. But the one negative is they probably won’t take all his college credits and we won’t know until June the final tally of credits. In contrast, U Albany would take all 36 and he’d easily graduate in 3 years. The ones in question are the CLEP Spanish (9-12 credits depending on how he does on the exam) and 2 Syracuse University (SUPA) classes-so 6 credits. They said they might be able to give credit (at least some) but can’t tell us until they see the exam result and get the transcripts to see if they match similar classes. The Spanish might just move him up a few levels so a major or minor would be easier.
My son regrets not signing up for AP Spanish and was wondering if he could sign up for it for May 2024. Wasn’t sure how that worked once you are a college student.
The positive with Case Western-and probably why they have so many double and triple majors-is that they allow classes to “double count” towards 2 majors or requirements. So he could do a double major with Psych & Cognitive Science or Psych & Spanish, for example, pretty easily. He applied for a music scholarship and didn’t get it but was accepted as a music major (without even applying?) if he wants it (wasn’t really on his radar.) And I’m not against him graduated in 3.5 or 4 years, rather than 3 (despite the cost savings)-he’s the one who is anxious to get on his PhD path which might require a year of working in the field before getting selected for a PhD program (he wants to apply right after undergrad and see if he gets lucky but odds are tough!)
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Ooops- I see you mentioned the CLEP exams, so my comment was moot!