<p>intparent- I am sorry these gifts are causing your family and friends stress. The tshirt thing might be a little blown out of proportion. My D sees it like everything else, part of the game, a lighthearted, fun part even if they will never be worn. Chicago seems to have insulted you in huge proportions! Send that stuff back, it will make you feel better! </p>
<p>Colleges advertise to get you pick them, you pick them and sell yourself back, they pick you and then they try to sell themselves again, and if we are lucky, our kids have great choices and get to make conscientious, balanced final decisions. </p>
<p>Another college offered all expenses paid flashy trip for a few kids and D. D declined. She felt another kid might be more likely to go there and D didn’t want to take one of the few spots offered. That is way more in the offering than a few freebies. I think most of our kids today get it. That trip didn’t sway her, it did me 
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<p>I get the money stress. That is a different conversation. One which needs to happen before the scarf starts flying…</p>