<p>So my mom and I don't have the best relationship. Sometimes I wonder why she dislike me so much compare to my other siblings. So I always have been on my own until now. I got accepted into my number one choice school. The problem now is the money. I am $7000 short (with max loan and grants). I begged my mom to help me by applying for the parent plus loan and I promised the I will pay every dollar back including interest (yes, interest too). She still says no. I turned to alternative plan, and curse on me that I am under 18, therefore I cannot borrow money from the banks either. I applied to dozens of scholarship since Sept and no luck. And of course, I also consider community college but my mom does not expect me to live with her after I graduate from high school, so moving out while going to community college does not make it any cheaper. I really don't know what else I can do. I cannot believe that everything I have worked for is ruined because of few thousands dollars. I am thinking of deferring my acceptance until next year, go to work. But I just want to ask is there any other way before taking that as my last resort. I am really scare to taking a year off because it will be really hard to get back. I mean I cannot be angry at my mom, she gave me three meals a day so she has done her job. Please help me.</p>
<p>You should absolutely contact the financial aid office of the school you have enrolled in. Contact the same person who signed the letter in your initial package and let them know what’s going on with your mother. They may be able to offer you a larger grant. If not, they are the ones who are going to know if there is any way around the age problem as far as loans. Good luck!</p>
<p>You need $7000/year after you maxed out on loans? How much will your debt be?</p>
<p>Not defending your mother, but promising now to return all the money after graduation does not mean much - who knows what your financial situation will be in 4 years…</p>
<p>@nngmm well, i didnt say anything about people cant defend my mom. I’m just asking for help and your answer doesnt provide much insight. I already told you all the solutions I came up with, so that’s why I asked.</p>
<p>A gap year isn’t your first choice, I understand that, but it may be a way to put money away to make up the shortage. I would agree you should call fin-aid to see what else might be available. Did your original award include work-study? If not see if they may include that. A part time campus job (10-12hrs/week), coupled with full time work for 8-10 weeks in the summer should net a student contribution of around $4k. </p>
<p>Good luck. Your dreams are not gone. All you’ve worked for is still there. The path may simply be a bit different. Please don’t give up!</p>
<p>Another vote for contacting the school, both the Fin Aid office and the Admissions Office. You need to do it today in any case because of the deadlines. I don’t know that taking a year off to work would help, since you would have to be self-supporting with the income of a high school graduate AND paying for your own room & board - like the CC, it wouldn’t really do the trick. Do you have any other relatives who might be willing to either help out or intercede for you with your mom?</p>
<p>I’m sorry you’re having this trouble; I’m sorry your mom isn’t being a good mom. Good luck. I hope you understand that feeding you isn’t all she owes you, and I hope you’re able to get past her and make a good life for yourself. It’s definitely possible to do; I have several friends who got past bad relationships to become successful adults.</p>
<p>Thank you for your answers. I have another question because I don’t understand how the interest work. </p>
<p>Let say the interest rate is 8% and I will borrow $7000. </p>
<p>Does that means I have to pay that interest every moth which is 7000*.08= $560
or
is that the total of interest that I have to pay at the end of the year, so 560/12= $47/month? Hope the question make sense and thank you again.</p>
<p>The very simple answer is $47/mo…IF you are paying interest only that starts accruing while the principle isn’t payable until you are out of school.</p>
<p>I don’t want to go into a more complex answer because this really isn’t my best area at all. Ask this question in the financial aid forum. There are some very, very smart people there that will help you out!!</p>
<p>IHateTests, Your mother may not be able to take out the loans. Not all parents want to share their credit history with their children. Just food for thought…</p>
<p>I agree with calling the school and also that if that does not work, then taking a year off and earning money is probably your best bet.</p>
<p>I called the school last month to ask about the Parent Plus Loan, they said if it was denied, they “could” increase the unsubsidized loan. And GeekMom63 made a good point that even if I take a year off, i sill have to support myself so I don’t think that would help either, unless if I can find some local shelter :P. I will call the school again the first chance I get. I am scare but I hope everything will work out okay. Thank you for all your kind words.</p>
<p>Although I guess your Mother has the right not to take out any loans to pay your education, it seems like she is unnecessarily harsh in her approach. The fact that she doesn’t want you to live with her after graduation to help you to finance your education doesn’t speak well of her. Most parents here will do anything to assist our children and will make extraordinary financial sacrifices to ensure our kids receive a great education. So I don’t blame you for your frustration with her. I understand where you’re coming from. Like most of the other posters, I think you should explain everything to the financial aid office and see if they are able to help you. Let us know how that goes.</p>
<p>sure step 1 is the college.
Beyond that, know it is possible your mother is doing this for you. Hard for a high school person to understand, I know. How is NOT taking a zillion dollars loan a good thing?
First, can it be with your other siblings, she simply can’t afford it?
Or,
There are many many threads here about borrowing so much that one’s lifestyle is negatively impacted for decades after graduation. Plus, the promise of a young person to pay back money means very little when they don’t have the funds to pay back money. You hope you will have the money of course, but your hopes wouldn’t pay your mothers’ debt she incurred for you, as nngmm said in post 3. Further, your promise to pay it all, including interest just doesn’t hold water when you don’t even understand how much interest, or how interest works. It makes you look like too much of a dreamer.
A dream school is a great dream, but college and life are practical matters. Not all college lessons are learned in the classroom, and how much a college costs is one of those lessons in life. So the help I am offering here is a possible insight for you of what may be going on with your mom.</p>
<p>Thanks, I am looking at another 2 years college that has residential hall and cost 1/4 of this school. After 2 years I can pick it up from there.</p>
<p>Your problem is not so much college as where are you going to live and how are you going to support yourself after high school graduation? If your current living arrangements are going to truly end, you need to be pursuing a lot of options, not just college ones as to what you are going to do. This is not a college issue.</p>
<p>If you cannot find a job, and you should be looking for one NOW and starting work now on a part time basis, you might want to consider joining the armed forces. Otherwise, you need to find a cheap place to stay and a job to get you through this year. Yes, continue to talk to the college and see if they can come up with enough money for you to move there, but you need to realize that it is only one alternative and you should not be putting all your hopes on that as a solution. Colleges are not there to give you money and a place to live. They are an option to those who have money or can gain access to it. You are looking to spend and incur debt rather than getting a job and joining the working world.</p>
<p>From a student’s prospective I see a few options:
Is your dad around? Is he able to help? Or would he agree to cosign a loan with you?
When is your eighteenth birthday? Most schools will let you set up a payment plan so if you took out loans after you were eighteen you could pay then.
7,000 dollars, though it’s not going to be easy can be made during summer and part time work wages.
Is there any other relative or close family friend (but careful here. I mean extremely close, like the kind you call aunt but isn’t aunt, or is actually someone’s step something but still grew up with them etc) that would either cosign a loan or give you some sort of personal loan?
Call the school like others have been saying.
You haven’t said a lot about your family situation, which is fine, but it’s hard to say whether or not your mother’s feelings are justified or not. I’m not defending her, but if she is swimming in debt herself, or has a lot more children, or does not make a lot of money, I understand her not wanting to take out the loan. But I do think the parents on this thread are being overly judgmental of a situation they know nothing about.
parent57: “The fact that she doesn’t want you to live with her after graduation to help you to finance your education doesn’t speak well of her. Most parents here will do anything to assist our children and will make extraordinary financial sacrifices to ensure our kids receive a great education.”…Really? I’m pretty sure the sacrifices most parents make in raising their kids more than equal a college education. And it’s probably far better for kids if their parents don’t put themselves in financial ruin just because they want to go to a more expensive school. No, my mother would not ever take out a PLUS loan. But does that mean she’s somehow less of a parent than those who would? If I am ever living at home while not enrolled full time in school (short of medical reasons) I am to pay rent. This has been the deal since I started high school. But does any of this mean that my mother has not been one of the best parents I’ve ever seen out of my family and friends? No, it doesn’t. Does a father, who though still living in your house, who doesn’t speak to you for nine years because you are “too mean” (as an eleven year old) but then throws money at you when you finally leave (and objects to your mother’s rent policy), in anyway make up for how he raised you? Does it anyway let him measure up to the mother who raised the children he ignored? No. It doesn’t.
Sorry if that was rantish, but this idea of better parents being the one’s who pay gets to me.</p>
<p>She indicated that she does not have a good relationship with her mother and feels her siblings are treated better. I don’t know the OP and can’t assess this situation, but until I hear from the mother, I am going to give her the benefit of the doubt and believe her version of the story. Not all parents are exemplary and she may have a difficult mother. I stand by what I said that many parents will do whatever it takes to see that their children receive the best education possible. I don’t see anything wrong empathizing with her, she is going through a difficult time right now.</p>
<p>Well, I don’t blame my mother at all. In fact, I am grateful that I have a mother, I just said that we don’t have the closest relationship. My parents are divorced, and I was gave up for adoption when I was 3 until 3 years ago when my real mom sponsored me to America, for that I am very grateful. Maybe the fact that we haven’t talk for 11 years is why we don’t understand each other. Non of my siblings grew up actually have any education assistance, we always have been on our own all our lives. I pushed myself to learn how to speak English. Please understand that I am in no shape or form complaining. I simply don’t know what I can do since school counselors are useless. I know being a parent must be hard since my foster parents worked so hard to raise me. My current mom planning to move to Florida after I graduate to live with her sister, this is the sole reason why living at home is not an option. I am really on my own now, so paying $7000/year (total) at a community college that offer residence hall is much better that renting a house (And my Fafsa is more than enough to cover that). I’m just disappointed that I cannot go to the school that I worked so hard for and got in because of money. But I finished high school, made another check to my “life todo list”, so I won’t let money be the obstacle to my next check.</p>
<p>Thank you so much for your answers, I am sure you are all wonderful parents. I really do hope for the best :)</p>