You have your head screwed on right. Unfortunately, your parents don’t. So humor them by applying to at least one place they think is cool enough, but cover yourself by chasing some money.
I can’t find the most recent thread here about automatic full rides that was started in 2017. It used to be pinned at the top of this forum. Maybe another poster will. Meanwhile, here are two older threads on automatic and merit-based full rides. Check each of the institutions listed and see whether the scholarships still exist or have changed:
http://automaticfulltuition.yolasite.com/
http://competitivefulltuition.yolasite.com/
There’s a serious disconnect here on the part of your parents if they want you to go to a very selective school, where merit aid is less likely to be offered, and yet they are counting on your better odds at being offered merit aid in comparison with your sister.
@BelknapPoint Sorry if it’s confusing, but my parents know that I’m not going to get merit at the highly-selective schools that they would rather I attend. To oversimplify things a bit, they generally put schools into two categories:
- Less-selective schools where I’m likely to get merit based on my stats.
- Highly-selective schools that have huge endowments and can therefore afford to offer very generous need-based aid.
Of course, there is still a significant disconnect here because I think they will find that most schools will not offer the level of aid (either merit or need) that they think is out there. Therein lies my problem.
ETA: And the other disconnect is that they assume they can simply borrow the rest of the tuition (however much that may end up being) while seeming to not understand the long-range consequences of doing so. What kills me is that they simply can’t be as clueless as they’re letting on, given that both went to business school and are very well-educated in financial matters.
Assuming OOS public costs $50-60k, that means that the net price after scholarships is $25-30k. So if she is borrowing $20k per year (presumably with parent cosigning for much of it), that means that some combination of student work and parent cash contribution is $5k to $10k. I.e. not very much.
You might be able to narrow down this reverse engineering of your parents’ contribution by finding out what the list and net price of your sister’s school is, and how much she is earning from her own work. But it looks like your parents are contributing very little cash, though they are cosigning loans (of course, their borrowing / cosigning capacity could run out). Which means that you need to find close to full ride merit money. Note: full tuition (rather than full ride) still leaves living expenses and books and stuff like that, which could be $15k to $20k, unless you live at home and commute, which may cost more like $5k, though parents often assume it to be $0 due to the costs being distributed in other parts of their household budget and therefore more hidden.
I agree with post #4 above but I’d add two things: to start with, pick a college like Pomona that uses myintuition; this is a very simple set of questions your parents can answer in less than 3 minutes. This way they’ll get their feet wet and when you ask them to complete a more detailed npc it’ll be less of a shock. Also, I wouldnt ask for the result if they don’t want to give it to you. Just ask if this school would be affordable for them without loans based on the result. Down the road you can send them each school to run NPCs. Obviously, you’ll want a balanced list anyway as you might not get in to the meets needs schools.
One issue that your parents should be concerned about: There is a limit regarding how many loans they will be allowed to cosign for. At some point the banks (or other lenders) might say “no more”. I have heard of a few cases of students who got part way through university and had to stop without graduating because they could not borrow any more. One then transferred to the #2 in-state public university, which happened to have a very good program in his major. However, he would have been much better off financially to just start at the in-state public university, and would have ended up with the same degree a year earlier (not all of his credits transferred).
I am pretty sure that this problem does not apply to the federally subsidized amounts ($5,500/$6,500/$7,500/$7,500 for the first four years). However, I am certainly not an expert on student loans.
Many very strong students attend their in-state public university, because that is what they can afford. If you attend your in-state university you will meet lots of them. When I was a graduate student at a very selective university there were a lot of other graduate students there who had done their undergrad at their in-state public university.
@mathhappy You sound very sensible. I also like your login name – I was a math major for undergrad (and majored in something closely related to math for my master’s).
There is for private lending, but not for PLUS loans. These parents can keep borrowing right through child #4 if the loan is a PLUS loan in the parent’s name. As long as the parents remain eligible (no bankruptcy, current on major debts like the mortgage, and don’t default on any government loans), they can borrow, borrow, borrow.
Not that I think they should. OP, I think your sister will regret borrowing that much. You will have some full ride options with those stats, and you should take one if offered. If you are NMF, you’ll have even more.
Definitely agree with @twoinanddone …if you apply wisely you can have some excellent affordable options.
Fwiw, I disagree with your parents (and most CC posters 
) that you need to attend an elite school for an excellent UG experience. All of our children have attend your avg state U (and we have some pretty advanced kids who graduated from high school ready to take 400 level in major courses freshman yr). All have had great UG experiences and excellent post UG opportunities.
Let’s be clear here. Your sister could take $5500 her freshman year, $6500 her sophomore year, $7500 her junior year, and $7500 her senior year in Direct Loans in her name only.
If “she” is taking out other federally funded loans…then SHE isn’t taking those loans at all. Those would be Parent Plus Loans and those must be taken by a parent…not a student. OR maybe your parents are co-signing private loans for her.
Regardless…the total over four years of Direct Loans is $27,000. So your parents are taking bout $53000 in additional loans for her or with her for the four years.
Please…try to avoid this if you can.
Look at those University of Alabama guaranteed scholarships. Apply early to places like University of Pittsburgh where you might land a merit award. Look at your instate public options…and their honors colleges. You might want to consider public colleges in your state outside of your flagship.
@CourtneyThurston this student had great stats, and wants to major in computer science. I thought you might be able to point her in the direction of some programs with good merit aid.
Okay, so I was able to successfully get my parents to fill out a couple of those inTuition things today (THANK YOU everyone for the fantastic advice!) and it looks like school is actually going to be far more affordable than I thought! I guess I must have wildly overestimated their assets or made some kind of typo when I was mock-filling out NPCs a few weeks ago. They have also agreed to fill out some NPCs tomorrow or the next day so we can get an even clearer picture. Again, thank you so much guys; you really are the best!
Great news @mathhappy I look forward to following you on your journey!
Are your stats a lot higher than your sisters? Her $20k/year loans are concerning.
@austinmshauri Yes, my sister had approximately a 3.5 and a 1500 with few honors/AP classes. I have a 3.9 and 36 with virtually all honors/AP. I think that the primary reason for her significant debt is that she wasn’t thinking about her school choices in terms of cost/benefit or long-term consequences, only the strength of the program and her ability to gain admission to it. I will continue to be very conscious about where I’m applying in terms of finances, but things really are looking up. I have had a more detailed conversation with my parents regarding their plan for funding my education and that of my siblings and I think they really do have it under control. Of course, I’ll keep you guys updated if need be!
With a 3.9 and 36ACT coupled with household income of less than $100K and another student in college, you are in good shape! Take a look at the schools that meet 100% need, many of them will be match schools for you. Of course, most are LACs but there are Unis on there. Also look at auto scholarships for your stats. Honestly, I’d be surprised if you couldn’t find a very affordable school unless your criteria is somehow substantially limiting.
i gave my children the parameters of what I would pay (instate college costs) and made clear that I would not co-sign loans or take out Parent Plus loans. I ran NPC’s on schools they were interested in. I do not share my financial info with them. Quite frankly, even my H doesn’t know what I make unless he looks at the W-2 when I send it to the CPA each year.
I guess I am the only one who is slightly skeptical. If your parents truly have a handle on this, why is your sister borrowing $20,000/yr?
Her stats were good. If her UW GPA was a 3.5 with a 1500, that is far from quantifying her situation as
The difference between a 36 and 1500 is approx the difference between a 36 and a 34. There is a difference, but not enough to leap to the automatic assumption that the outcomes will be significantly different. Once you cross a certain threshold, differences have less significant of an impact. Think of scores being evaluated more in terms of ranges vs this score = this outcome.
For competitive schools and competitive merit, admissions and awards are going to be holistic and extremely competitive. If you have the resume of outside accomplishments to match your test scores and coursework that represents something truly significantly different than your sister, then your parents might have good insight to your possible outcomes. But, test scores and GPA combos by themselves only provide givens for automatic merit.
Best wishes during your application season.
Very wise position!!
@Mom2aphysicsgeek, I mentioned something similar above. Maybe OP thinks they can get enough merit that the federal student loan and the parents’ ~$5-10k/year will make college affordable? Or maybe their state college offers guaranteed merit. I hope OP refuses to sign on for the level of debt that their sibling did.
One thing for parents to check is both Intuition/NPC for when both sisters are in college and when there is only one…
A 3.9 UW with lots of honors/AP is likely a 4+ weighted GPA, so with the 36 you can apply to Alabama Honors for the presidential elite scholarship and have one sure fire financial safety. Apply in July, add your state Flagship, 1-2 others with big merit (USC Columbia for instance - will require extensive essays) and then enjoy choosing among the many highly selective universities and LACs you find appealing.
@mathhappy
You need to cast a wide net when you apply to colleges.
- Include schools that meet full need for all as well as schools where you are guaranteed merit aid based on your stats.
- Don’t assume that any school that meets full need for all students is a match school.
- Some schools that meet full need for all have much deeper pockets and more generous need based aid than others. For example...don’t assume that your net price calculator results for Yale will match anyone else’s.
- You are smart to be researching this now.
- Look at your instate public colleges. Do any have honors colleges? Are they affordable?
- Apply to some schools where your stats would put you in consideration for merit aid...but these would not be guarantees.
- If your family finances are easy ones (no divorced parents, no self employed parents, no secondary real estate), the net price calculators on the college websites will give you a good estimate of you net costs. Estimate...because they are currently set up for students starting fall 2019. Policies do change.
- Merit aid will not be income dependent...and will also not change when your sibling is no longer in college. Need based aid has the potential to change from year to year.
- Get the book “Paying for College Without Going Broke”
- I flagged @CourtneyThurston because I think she might have some ideas about computer science programs where merit aid would be possible given your stats. She can also explain how computer science programs differ...or not...from college to college.