<p>One of my D's friends who is the top student in their high school is estranged from his parents. The student has gotten some phone calls from some "top 10" schools to which he has applied, indicating likely acceptance. He has not submitted the FAFSA because his parents are not speaking to him and won't provide the information. He lives with friends, and gets by with a little financial help from other relatives.</p>
<p>Assuming his relationship with parents cannot be salvaged, what is the best course of action? His parents have enough income that their contribution would probably be 10-20 K per year. He would be willing to take out loans to cover this but we're not even sure if he could get loans without their cosignature. </p>
<p>They refuse to give him any information (2007 tax form, for example). </p>
<p>Should he be consulting with an attorney to either legally sever relationship, or at least to obtain copies of their tax form? Should he wait to be admitted to schools, then work directly with the Finaid departments to work this out? </p>
<p>Please don't suggest reconciliation. I've gone over that with him, and it's just not likely. There are some circumstances I can't go into here that make that very unlikely.</p>
<p>Thanks very much for any help from someone who's been through this, or from someone with legal expertise!</p>
<p>My ex-husband is doing the same to our son. What we decided to do is fill out all the paperwork and write each financial aid office explaining the situation and asking for an exception. The worst they can say is "no." </p>
<p>What I understand is that exceptions are granted. If your D's friend can get a letter(s) from his GC, clergy, teachers, the parents with whom he's living, etc., that would provide independent verification, which is very important. He may want to be careful about any relatives that write on his behalf, especially grandparents, that they don't present themselves as "de facto" parents that could be viewed as a major source of financial support. </p>
<p>But he should get his paperwork filed ASAP (this weekend!) so he's not missing deadlines (or minimizing the miss). What a crummy situation - my heart goes out to him!</p>
<p>My D knows someone who went through that 2 years ago. The student was able to get waivers by providing letters backing her up from the school psychologist as well as a family friend who is an attorney.</p>
<p>Contact financial aid of the school(s). Before you do, it will help if you have proof (people -- particularly from your HS like the GC or teachers -- who can verify the situation). Good luck, it is not as unusual as you think unfortunately.</p>
<p>Sounds like you friend is on his own. His life is not over however.
He is learning a life lesson - that you can't always get what you want, when you want it and how you want it.<br>
I have seen plenty of kids get good college educations without a cent from their parents. It is hard, requires a lot of work but they have succeeded.</p>
<p>My daughter graduated from hs with a kid who went to the local CC. With no help from parents and working full time he got his Associates degree and then transferred to Cornell university for engineering. He gradutes this year - 6 years after high school and received no parental help.</p>
<p>Your friend has options - some of which he may not like. He can work full time and go to school part time while establishing his legal independence from them. He can join the service - veterans are automatically considered independent students. I know one kid who didn't want loans - he spent three years in the Army, qualified for the GI bill and got loads of money for school.
By the time he was 25 years old he had his degree plus 3 years in the Army including a tour in Afghanistan and one tour in Iraq.</p>
<p>Thanks for those who encourage letters from GC. I will help him work on that this week. He has been very forthcoming with the school admin about this situation which has been going on for a year now. He's headed into engineering, so I'm confident loans and paying them back are not a bad way to go for him. The primary worry now is how to communicate with college finaid offices to continue to be in the running for a spot where he can really take off academically. He's the type that would take full advantage of the most challenging educational environment, but needs to get the money figured out. He's not looking for a free lunch, just a fair one.</p>
<p>I would agree that being very forthright with the finaid office and admissions office of the college is the best bet. Decades ago when I had just graduated from college, my mother would not fill out any financial aid forms either, though we had a good relationship. I talked at length with a professional school I wanted to go to and that really wanted me. They ended up declaring me independent for their purposes (that won't work for the feds :-) and giving me instate tuition and some scholarship money, so that although I had to take out some loans, it wasn't as much as I feared. I got a job to pay my living expenses and made it.</p>
<p>He can appeal to the court to become an emancipated minor, after which he can apply for FA as an independent student. If he begins the emancipation process soon he may be able to apply for FA as an independent student for the 2008-2009 school year. Meanwhile, he can work to support himself and perhaps attend community college.</p>
<p>Having uncooperative parents is not enough criteria for a dependency override. Being estranged is not enough.</p>
<p>From the above link:</p>
<p>
[quote]
In particular, the following circumstances do not merit a dependency override, either alone or in combination:</p>
<pre><code>* Parents refuse to contribute to the student's education;
* Parents are unwilling to provide information on the application or for verification;
* Parents do not claim the student as a dependent for income tax purposes;
* Student demonstrates total self-sufficiency.
</code></pre>
<p>Note that all of these circumstances are largely discretionary in nature. A student cannot become independent just because the parents are unwilling to help pay for the student's college education.</p>
<p>Although these circumstances are not sufficient for a dependency override, they do not preclude it. Sometimes there are additional circumstances that occur in conjunction with these circumstances that do merit a dependency override. These can include the following:</p>
<pre><code>* an abusive family environment (e.g., sexual, physical, or mental abuse or other forms of domestic violence)
* abandonment by parents
* incarceration or institutionalization of both parents
* parents lacking the physical or mental capacity to raise the child
* parents whereabouts unknown or parents cannot be located
* parents hospitalized for an extended period
* an unsuitable household (e.g., child removed from the household and placed in foster care)
* married student's spouse dies or student gets divorced
</code></pre>
<p>
[/quote]
</p>
<p>From the OP -While it sounds like the parents and child did not have a good relationship, it does not appear the criteria would be met. Simply being estranged (I know that sounds bad) is probably not enough to qualify.
Refusing to supply financial information or refusing to contribute to the cost of education for one's child is not enough for the child to be proclaimed independent or get a dependency waiver.
I don't mean to sound pessimistic but realistic.
While this student is free to pursue the possibility a back up plan should also be considered.</p>
<p>Without sharing too much on a public forum, he has some of the circumstances in the "do merit" list, unfortunately. I'm glad you posted these lists. This may be helpful to others.</p>
<p>I am thrilled to report that this student successfully worked out an agreement with admissions and the financial aid department at his dream school. A synopsis: he was accepted at a HYPS, but had been alienated from his parents for over a year and was caught in the FAFSA web.</p>
<p>He was admitted to his first choice HYPS in March, but could not fill out the FAFSA due to lack of cooperation from parents. </p>
<p>After many conversations with the financial aid office, documentation of his circumstances by teachers, relatives, guidance counselors and friends, and the strength of his application, all is well. </p>
<p>His EFC will be negligible, easily managed with work study. </p>
<p>This kid has had a very unusual and unfortunate last couple of years, but is also incredibly talented, likable and deserving of a break. Thought you might like to know that he got one.</p>
<p>CountingDown, thanks but I really have to hand it to CC posters and PMers (you know who you are) who gave us the insights into the process to do the right things quickly. </p>
<p>Thanks for giving so freely of your time and information. You've helped a kid who, in his own words, would have "fallen through the cracks."</p>
<p>How wonderful! I remembered this post and was wondering how things turned out for him. Thanks for sharing the happy ending. Wait, I guess that's "happy beginning." :)</p>
<p>When I hear of situations like this, it reminds me not to grumble about paying full fare for our children. He is truely the person for whom FA is meant.</p>