Peers with unrealistic aspirations?

<p>Is it better to leave them to their dreams or drag them out into reality?</p>

<p>I have a friend of mine who wants to go to Harvard and become a doctor. However, she, for the past three years of high school, has been completely unambitious. </p>

<p>She gets C's and B's for grades. She has never taken any honors classes or AP classes.
She only just learned what the SAT was, and is planning on taking it at the end of her senior year. She has joined no clubs or sports whatsoever. In fact, the only thing she does outside of school is watch anime.</p>

<p>When I asked her what she thought her chances were, she believed she had a "60-70%" chance, but would probably get in if she got her grades up.</p>

<p>Ouch… would not want to be her…</p>

<p>No point in breaking their hearts. They’ll resent you for it.</p>

<p>Just leave her. She’ll find out eventually.</p>

<p>If she doesn’t even have enough ambition to Google Harvard’s admission stats, she probably doesn’t care that much about Harvard to begin with.
It’s the people who are aware of the competition and devote all their efforts to getting in that I’d be most concerned about.</p>

<p>I have a friend who is like that too. Personally, if I were in her shoes, I would abhor the person who kills my dreams and tears it to pieces. At the same time tho, if a friend isnt telling something that I havent realized, I wouldnt call that person a friend. </p>

<p>A friend isnt someone who tells the person what they want to hear. It’s a person who will tell you the truth and tell you what others wont.</p>

<p>At the same time tho, she didnt ask for your opinion. That’s why, I would tell her that you think she needs to work a bit harder to achieve her dreams. But never tell her she cant do it, because that would be cruel.</p>

<p>My friend wants to go to Harvard and become a doctor too. He has a mix of B’s, even though he takes the “hardest” course possible for a freshman at his public school (geometry, biology), he’s not even top 10% of his grade. He got a 82 in honors bio lol. He’s also not very ambitious either, he joined various math/science clubs but doesn’t participate much. He likes to hang out often and whenever I’m forced to commute back home from my school which is in another town, I usually see him at the library and he never studies.</p>

<p>Also, you don’t have to go to Harvard for undergrad to go to medical school there, as far as I know.</p>

<p>Maybe its a case of who she knows? Is her last name Kennedy?</p>

<p>Alright. I tried to be as kind as possible…
I told her that she should try to get a 2300+ score on the SAT if she can, and she should try to take more science and math related courses.
She told me that she thinks that should be really easy but getting a 4.0 GPA sounds harder. (she’s not taking any challenging classes at all whatsoever) </p>

<p>She apparently has absolutely no idea how the SAT works at all whatsoever. She’s considering not taking it at all because she “doesn’t feel like it”.</p>

<p>Talking to her about this is almost painful.</p>

<p>Then, like I said, she probably doesn’t have much emotion invested in Harvard in the first place. Especially if she just heard the name on TV or something and has never heard of any other college.</p>

<p>Just let her fantasize, I’m still trying to decide between being president or batman lol. I actually get irritated when people tell me that its impossible, because its not impossible just extremely super unlikely like her chances at harvard.</p>

<p>There’s a lot of people like that at my school, honestly. A lot of pop-star, writer, artist, Hollywood and especially Ivy-League hopefuls.
Don’t mercilessly crush their dreams. Just…give strong suggestions. If she’s in her junior year and she still has no idea, then she probably doesn’t even care in the first place.</p>

<p>Let her find out the hard way</p>

<p>There are so many people at my school who want to become doctors.
I really don’t think they have a realistic idea of how much work it is. </p>

<p>Is it fair to just let them waste their time pursuing a dream they’re probably never achieve?
Some of them sincerely believe they have a chance.</p>

<p>Pretty much everyone in my school wants to do something with medicine. All the girls want to be nurses or gynecologists (I dunno) and all the guys want to be physical therapists.</p>

<p>If they become doctors then great, if they don’t then, well they’ll find out on their own.</p>

<p>

</p>

<p>And when you go back to your 20 year and 10 year high school reunion, what you will find out is that many of them will get what they want, and some of what they want will change over time, too. </p>

<p>At your age, you are wise to know not to tell other people what they can and cannot do, be or want. Some of the best students you know in high school will fall apart in college, or later in life. And, some kids you think are not good students or are stupid, will turn out to have been the one’s with the energy and personality to make things happen in the world.</p>

<p>What you know now is a world of tests and homework. The world out there rewards all sorts of qualities that you and your peers haven’t even begun to develop or use, yet.</p>

<p>So, don’t count anybody out, now, and don’t count anybody in, yet. Heck, you could even write down your predictions right now, put them away, and look at them again in ten years. You’ll be surprised by how differently it all looks then.</p>

<p>Good luck to you.</p>

<p>I honestly doubt she will even complete the application (or be able to), between the supplements, resumes and extra tests (SAT IIs) the application is a ton of work. Simply encourage her to look at as many colleges as possible.</p>

<p>No one benefits from you crushing your friend’s dreams. If you want to look out for her, just make sure she applies to some “safety” schools that you think she has an actual chance of getting into.</p>

<p>My friend wants to be a surgeon, but hates biology and refuses to take AP/IB Bio.</p>