Hey-o. Just a fellow freshman at UCSC, and I realized that its really hard for me to make friends. Like, I do join stuff so I can be able to meet new people, and at first, its great. But then after awhile, the people I talk to and who I think are my friends tend to lose interest in me, stop texting me, and basically stop saying hi to me even when I walk past them. I felt like my entire life, its been this vicious cycle where I meet someone, we get a long, we text for a few days, then they just don’t talk to me anymore or don’t put any effort. Another example I can bring is that I met this girl in my writing class, and we were friends ever since the class has started. However, ever since I introduced her to this other girl I knew, she has been pretty much hanging out with her and texting her all the time. The other girl told me that they basically text all the time now. Which kinda hurts because both of them don’t even talk to me anymore or NEVER text me unless I text something to them, and the writing class has ended. I wonder if there is something wrong with me as people start to get to know me? I only managed to make one friend in college, and that’s because she has told me she does not have any friends either, and we also have common interest. Literally all of the people I have met her don’t ever talk to me again once they get to know me, and never says hi when I walk past them.
Do you ever initiate getting together or attempt to sustain texting when the other person starts to show signs of disinterest? Maybe you’re misinterpreting people being busy as them not being interested in you? Have you talked to any of your current friends about why this might happen?
It is pretty much both. It goes to the extent to where I am always the one who has to initiate texting or ask if we can get together. I told this to one friend and she did not really offer much except talking about her on issues. And the thing is, this has been happening the entirety of my life. And from high-school I only have one friend who I still talk to.
I wouldn’t place much stock on the fact you only have 1 friend from high school you still talk to. People change a lot from high school to college, during college, and then after college. I’m only really good friends with one person from high school, and it’s actually my ex girlfriend lol!
Join some clubs, go to some parties, talk to people in class - you’ll find a couple friends.