<p>Curious how others that chose that perfect school became comfortable with being just a bit farther from home than they planned. Think double the drive but still < 8 hours or a plane ticket away. </p>
<p>Are you the student or a parent? It makes a difference in the answer. :)</p>
<p>I am the parent but the student is the one unsure about the distance. </p>
<p>Unless this is a student who is set to enroll at maybe-too-far-away-college/university this fall, don’t worry about this just yet. Pay a visit, and see what the travel experience feels like. Then encourage your kid to apply. By April 1 next spring, feelings about distance may have changed, feelings about how perfect the college/university is may have changed, the student’s application may have been rejected, or the student may have been admitted with an utterly unaffordable financial aid package. Truly, worrying about the distance right now may not be worth everyone’s emotions.</p>
<p>You also could take advantage of your kid’s questioning about the distance as an opener to discuss the whole leaving-the-nest-for-college business. Some kids really do prefer to stay closer to home. Mine did.</p>
<p>Thanks. Exactly how I have been approaching it thus far. We just did the visit and his response was exactly the first part of my title. I had been encouraging the visit knowing feelings about distance could change a lot between now and May of 2016 when the decision must be made. I really want him to at least apply. </p>
<p>I agree that a TON of growing up happens in that last year of high school. My kids both went far away to school. But if you had asked me junior year about this, I would have been uncertain that youngest would want to. Well… I am now home with the empty nest and the dog in the Midwest, and she is in California. Didn’t even come home this summer, took a research job on campus. For your student, though, I would be sure she does apply to a couple of choices close to home in case she does decide she doesn’t want to go far away. We did that for youngest (I thought of them as ‘location safeties’). She got into both of them – one was a low match and the other a low reach, so I suppose they weren’t really “safeties”, but I knew she would have at least one choice close to home. I think she liked having those choices right up until she decided, too.</p>
<p>Options for his desired major in state are not perfect in other ways over which we can have no control whatsoever (size, reputation, etc)</p>
<p>Well… honestly, thoughts on majors can change in the last year as well. Junior year my D2 thought biology (great! easy to find tons of colleges for that!). Senior year she took physics, and thought maybe physics (hmm… rework college list a bit…). Then she got to college and took a required Computer Science course. Guess what? Comp Sci major. She is at a school that could accommodate any of the three, of course. If you have an in-state option (flagship, for example) that offers a lot of majors or something related, have him apply anyway. He could change his mind.</p>
<p>The physical distance really is only psychological. Once you are away 4 hours or 8 hours is more to the point. And with either you will likely be in your college world bubble, there isn’t time to go home all the time. Skype, email phone will be the main contact, whether 4 hrs or 8.</p>
<p>All great ideas but state flagship is almost 4x the number of students he prefers (right now). Of course it will remain in consideration, but I don’t hold out much hope that his mind will change THAT much and until it does we will keep looking for other options. 
At least we have him thinking. </p>
<p>To me less than 8 hours is nothing in the greater scheme of things–and I am someone who does not like driving. If it’s close to that, and you live in a cold climate, I would be prepared to fly him home for the winter breaks. My son is 13+ hours away (well, 7000 miles away this summer–he is in Asia!) and it really has not been a big deal at all. Once they’re away, they’re away. The one thing I would NOT do is make a big deal of it.</p>
<p>Thanks for all the great replies. Just to provide a bit more insight, I joke that my DS comes around to things a year later than his classmates. He is a thoughtful, data based decision maker. We have started this process on the early side to accommodate that decision style. This is one time that he cannot sit back, see how his classmates’ decisions turn out, and then decide. His style works great when faced with peer pressure but not so well when a decision has a firm deadline. :-)</p>
<p>I’ve seen some students feel that applying is the same as committing. Of course, don’t apply to a school that you have no interest at all in attending, but if there is a chance you may choose it- then apply.</p>
<p>Senior year is still a relatively long time to a student. Once a student applies to a college, he or she may receive communications via e mail or brochures about different programs, visiting opportunities, and the student also has the chance to contact the school for questions. By spring, your son will know where he is accepted, the cost, and other aspects. He can make the choice then.</p>
<p>Pennylane2011 you have said it well! He won’t even consider buying a t-shirt, hat, etc. because that might look like he has decided. We knew this going in so we have not even offered. We are just encouraging applying at this point. If we get him to apply to 6 it will be a HUGE success. </p>
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<p>I am sympathetic to this, D2 was also like this, so we started early. And like @pennylane2011 said, I had to remind her that applying was not committing to attending. We ended up doing a lot of visiting. We visited all choices before applying – but starting early helped us spread this out pretty well. And then she went back to her top 3 choices for accepted student visits (of course they were scattered all over the country, none close to home :(). But it worked out very well, she was rock solid certain of her choice and has been very happy there. </p>
<p>His teachers say he is very “strategic” about where and how he puts in effort–and say it as praise. The frustrated parent in me sometimes fears it will cross the line into laziness. The college application process is NOT a good place to have that happen. [-O< </p>