Personal Reflection: It’s All Rigged

Rigged against? There’s a difference between a system that is designed to keep you out vs. a system that is in the process of being redefined to not give the historical, de facto, self-selecting advantage. “White upper middle class boys” are well represented at the nation’s “elite” colleges. Still. The majority, not the minority.

That sounds more like a bad made-for-TV movie than what your real life experiences will be like. How would that work? Would you move on to campus, pull up the campus directory, filter it by “rich kids” and “legacies”, find out where the “Privileged Meetup for Mean Kids” is happening, then show up, uninvited, to confess your lack of success at gaining entry to universities where the vast majority of applicants also get rejected? Queue the bullying…?

That’s not at all how it works, fortunately.

What’s actually going to happen is that you’re going to join the legions of young adults who took a chance on super-selective admissions and it didn’t work out. You’ll attend one of the other great schools that loved you back. If you allow yourself, you’ll have a great experience. If you continue to delude yourself that you’ve somehow fallen into “discriminated against/minority status”, you’re going to find your experience to be less than fulfilling.

You clearly got into some great schools. You got into some schools that others dream of getting into, but didn’t. If that’s what you value (and that’s the impression that I get from reading your original and subsequent posts in this thread), then you’ve got a win.

Your logic doesn’t follow. If unhooked, high achieving students from upper income families are getting rejected from elite colleges in droves then it’s highly probable that most of you will be going to your safeties. Therefore, you should be surrounded by other high achieving, upper income students. And just so you know, there are plenty of highly intelligent students who come from lower income families. It’s unfortunate that you didn’t get into your dream schools, but you may want to try adjusting your attitude. If everyone who attends your safety is an idiot, what does that say about you?

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Just maybe your bad attitude came through in your essays and LORs?

I would hold a different view on the systematic process rather than just saying it is rigged. Not everything works out in the way you want it to. But, for future applications in a career down the road, you can learn from this and prove to others how you became stronger. I am sorry it went this way for you.

Your attitude will determine your altitude.

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My son went to his safety to study engineering. Top student, Ivy type scores for SAT and Subject Tests - SAT 2 Math score of 780, etc. A dozen AP classes with high scores. Outstanding club, sports, art participation with leadership and state-level recognition. Didn’t get into his top choices. He needed a lot of financial aid, but not Pell Grant level. No hooks almost always means no chance for middle class students at the Ivy+ level, regardless of gender.

Safeties aren’t what they were years ago. He’s being challenged. Engineering in any school is a challenge. It has been a good fit. He’s happy. It turned out fine.

Sure, the system is flawed. Many deserving kids don’t get in. Many less deserving kids do. Keep in mind that you may really love your safety. As others have mentioned, with so many talented applicants attending their safety colleges, you might be pleasantly surprised at the level of student you encounter at your college.

OP- take a day to mourn and then get back to us and let us know which schools you are considering.

If you only took hard classes in HS for the sake of college admissions, then you really DID mess up. Challenging yourself because that’s who you are is a life skill that will pay off for decades; doing something because other people expect it, or because it’s how you think you’re going to get your ticket punched never works out the way you think it will.

I’m curious which colleges you think are filled with dolts and losers.

@blossom I am EXTREMELY HAPPY to say I am officially depositing at GW (after quickly getting off the waitlist with plenty of financial aid). Georgetown was my dream school for the past two years because DC & politics are my passion, so being rejected did sting. But I’m thrilled to be attending GW ultimately, as it has a far nicer location imo and I honestly will get everything I wanted location/internship wise.

I am still waitlisting at Carnegie Mellon, BC and Wake Forest. I may attend CMU if I get off the priority waitlist, but I’m content with my results.

@socaldad2002 My extracurriculars are extremely social & my essays were about very personal family/friends struggles + how my close friend has made me a better person. So i’d disagree

So sad:(
I’m sure your entitlement came through in your essays and that doesn’t read well. Hot take, @blondeboynj, you’re not Bill Clinton (a Rhodes Scholar).
Just because mediocre white guys have gotten an advantage throughout history by their birth alone, doesn’t mean that it’s just or remotely ethical. There is no moral reason for you to gain an advantage. Yes, it has gotten harder for white men to get into elite colleges, but not because they’re discriminated against; the system has simply become juster and more inclusive.
No one has taken “your spot” at elite institutions; in fact, many mediocre white guys have taken other, more qualified people’s respective “spots” for centuries.
I know I’m being harsh, and I realize that your situation is difficult especially when you’ve been working hard in school for so long, but this no way to express that. As pissed off as I am, I still wish you the best and hope you can consider your words and actions. Try to learn from your experience to be a better person and student; don’t give up.

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@macroraptor Well said!!

The people who feel that colleges are rigged and feel upset by this often don’t think about how unfair our preK - 12 system of education is in the States. The opportunities you had can’t be compared with those of many who are from less well off school districts. Read Savage Inequalities and then think about what it really means to be ‘rigged’. If anything, colleges are often favoring full pay students. They do often have a big advantage in admission at various schools. See Angel Perez of Trinity College’s article about how they have to fill a certain amount of tuition each year by admitting enough full and most pay students which can mean taking higher-ranking kids off the admit list. That school is not alone in this. You don’t complain about how it is unfair that inner city schools are less well funded and have less than many schools in areas like where it sounds you live and you don’t complain about the advantage wealthy people have who can full pay, just ‘minorities’. Others are right that if you were trying for LACs in the NE as a male who wants the humanities, that is usually an advantage as most of those schools want to keep the male female ratio 50/50 and most have majority female students.

I’m glad you got the school you wanted. I disagree that going to a ‘lesser’ ranked school would be a disadvantage. most CEOs went to state schools (and not top ranked ones). There is something to be said for having to work harder and make it in a school that doesn’t pamper its students. This builds skills that are useful to success in the real world that many who go to those schools have to develop and some at higher ranked schools that cater to students don’t have to develop as much. Also, top students can stand out in lower ranked schools and get more research and internship opportunities as a result. Being the lowest ranked person at a high school is not shown to be as good as being a big fish in a small pond on future career success according to some research studies on this.

And if you did get into Tulane and are saying the students there are a bunch of dummies or whatever word it was you used, that’s really offensive and wrong. Tulane is a great school. Someone I know went there and is very well off. He credits the college to much of his success. That’s one person but that school certainly has a solid reputation for being a great college.

I hope you don’t go through life with these types of limited judgments of people and schools and things. It will make your life less enjoyable and you will miss a lot and you might come off as arrogant to the point others are offended and you end up missing things as a result of their reaction to that.

To OP: I sympathize but the system is always rigged because the system is shaped to favor those with more power and influence in the system. Giving some spots in colleges is no biggie; what matters is in the real world. That’s how things are. I can make an argument that for high achieving Asian males, not only colleges are rigged but the real world. But I won’t because it serves no purpose but adds to self defeatist attitude. Anyway, have a good cry and then watch a good movie. Life is still worth living. I got lousy grades from high school, colleges and got fired from all my jobs, but I still ended up doing very well because I have one rule: I never blame anyone else. When I get mad, I try to get ahead instead of engaging in self-pity. Why? Life is too short.

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@macroraptor is being a bit harsh.

Yes he is not Bill Clinton or a Rhodes scholar. You have to actually attend college for that to be the case and he very well may be one in the end. Who knows?

Also hopefully he has values.

Lastly, he is not a mediocre person at all. And describing human beings in such a manner is pretty elitist.

However OP being hurt and angry doesn’t mean you have the right to lash out at underrepresented groups getting a fair chance at the same success as you.

They were incredibly strong candidates to gain admission.

Being was hurt and bothered is no excuse for any intolerance…

I think you’ve received some valuable feedback from the posters

I’m happy you’ve moved on and are happy. GW is fantastic.

Good luck and grow OP. Be happy for others and tolerant as well. We are all in this big game together.

Honestly, I agree to a point. Middle-class families often do get screwed (especially with fin aid) and being an ORM or a majority race is really not helpful sometimes, but those are factors outside of your control.

The system is not fair and it’s not meant to be that way. If it worked like it does in some Asian countries, then we would have major problems, because Western society frowns upon that level of gung-ho academic cutthroat competition. And also, our testing standards are considerably more diluted and watered down nowadays. Just look at the number of kids who get perfect scores on the SAT/ACT alone.

Colleges aren’t looking at numbers, they’re looking for people. But even if they like you, that’s no guarantee that you’ll get in, especially at a prestigious college—that’s just how competitive it is.

Bill Clinton and Beto O’Rourke would NEVER react the way you did. They both have optimistic personalities. They might feel disappointed, but never defeated. The most successful politicians have optimistic personalities. You have to in order to keep going.

I’m glad you were admitted to GW. Make the best of your four years.

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Just stumbled on this. Please reflect a bit on what you have said here. If you still feel good about it, please rethink your career choice. We don’t need more politicians who think they are above regular people and who want to blame the minorities when they don’t get their way.

At first I assumed this wasn’t a real poster, but I think it is, which is a bit disturbing and disheartening.

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Good point. Hadn’t even thought about that part.

How does it feel to be one of those advantaged by what you feel is a blatently rigged, unfair system?