Personal Statement

College Essays
1

<p>Can someone please correct my personal statement?</p>

<p>One significant personal quality I value is my determination and resilience. This quality has helped me survive the rigorous courses in high school and motivated me to strive for success even though I had failed several times. I feel that my determination should be important for someone to know because it helps them recognize that I am not willing to give up on my task or goal and will attempt to overthrow any obstacle.
One example in my life that demonstrates my resilience is my junior year in high school. Due to my determination to participate in advanced placement classes, I had to face more challenges than what average students would encounter. As the first semester progressed, my grades decline gradually as I laid off my studying and continue to play games. The moment I realized my failure in these classes, my determination grew stronger. I knew the consequences that can occur in the future, including my inability to graduate.
Therefore, I quickly devised several methods, such as time management and increased studying hours, to effectively improve my grades. Furthermore, I asked my parents to place me in tutoring centers so I would receive additional aid in my assignments. My determination continued to grow as I began altering from my usual personality. Soon I found myself breaking out from timidity and requesting other peers for guidance.
My perspicacity allowed me to obtain A’s in my classes instead of my previous C’s. I dedicate most of the day to doing my homework and taking time analyzing the mistakes I made. Also, much to my parents’ and friends’ surprise, I voluntarily isolate myself from extreme entertainment, such as television and video games. Other students have realized their weaknesses in these rigorous courses and have given up by switching to easier classes. However, my determination motivated me to act differently from average students and strive for success. I understand that my personal quality will play a vital role in my success in college as it will motivate me to challenge myself and develop effective learning methods that helped me succeed in college.</p>

2

<p>Was there a particular prompt for this?</p>

<p>Also, please read the warning at the top of the forum about posting personal info online.</p>

3

<p>If your goal is to show determination, and you actually used the word “determination” or its synonyms, you have failed the essay; if you used it many times, you have failed it in multitudes. Recount a story, let the reader figure out you have determination. After reading you essay, if “determination” is not the first word the READER comes up with, you need to continue to work on it.</p>