What do colleges look for in a personal statement or essay? I’ve read quite extensively online on this but most info turns out to be contradicting or just plain rubbish. Is it okay to incorporate humor? I don’t want to sound full of myself, yet I would not like to bash myself. Just looking for your opinion to help myself as well as other prospective students to understand what the admissions committee are really looking for
self effacing is fine. but it’s hard to effectively write humor. Please have a trusted adult read it.
This essay may be an urban legend, but it’s still fun to read. Enjoy:
This is an actual essay written by a college applicant to > NYU. The author was accepted and is now attending NYU. >
[QUOTE=""]
3A. IN ORDER FOR THE ADMISSIONS STAFF OF > OUR COLLEGE TO GET TO KNOW YOU, THE > APPLICANT, BETTER, WE ASK THAT YOU ANSWER > THE FOLLOWING QUESTION: > > ARE THERE ANY SIGNIFICANT EXPERIENCES > YOU HAVE HAD, OR ACCOMPLISHMENTS YOU > HAVE REALIZED, THAT HAVE HELPED TO DEFINE > YOU AS A PERSON? >
[/QUOTE]
> I am a dynamic figure, often seen scaling walls and > crushing ice. I have been known to remodel train stations on > my lunch breaks, making them more efficient in the area of heat > retention. I translate ethnic slurs for Cuban refugees, I > write award-winning operas, I manage time efficiently. > > Occasionally, I tread water for three days in a row. > > I woo women with my sensuous and godlike trombone > playing, I can pilot bicycles up severe inclines with unflagging > speed, and I cook Thirty-Minute Brownies in twenty minutes. > I am an expert in stucco, a veteran in love, and an outlaw in > Peru. > > Using only a hoe and a large glass of water, I once > single-handedly defended a small village in the Amazon > Basin from a horde of ferocious army ants. I play bluegrass > cello, I was scouted by the Mets, I am the subject of numerous > documentaries. When I’m bored, I build large suspension > bridges in my yard. I enjoy urban hang gliding. On > Wednesdays,after school, I repair electrical appliances free of > charge. > > I am an abstract artist, a concrete analyst, and a ruthless > bookie. Critics worldwide swoon over my original line of > corduroy evening wear. I don’t perspire. I am a private > citizen, yet I receive fan mail. I have been caller number > nine and have won the weekend passes. Last summer I toured > New Jersey with a traveling centrifugal-force demonstration. I > bat 400. > > My deft floral arrangements have earned me fame in > international botany circles. Children trust me. > > I can hurl tennis rackets at small moving objects with > deadly accuracy. I once read Paradise Lost, Moby Dick, and > David Copperfield in one day and still had time to refurbish an > entire dining room that evening. I know the exact location of > every food item in the supermarket. I have performed several > covert operations with the CIA. I sleep once a week; when I do > sleep, I sleep in a chair. While on vacation in Canada, I > successfully negotiated with a group of terrorists who had > seized a small bakery. The laws of physics do not apply to me. > > I balance, I weave, I dodge, I frolic, and my bills are all > paid. On weekends, to let off steam, I participate in > full-contact origami. Years ago I discovered the meaning > of life but forgot to write it down. I have made extraordinary > four course meals using only a mouli and a toaster oven. > > I breed prizewinning clams. I have won bullfights in San > Juan, cliff-diving competitions in Sri Lanka, and spelling bees at > the Kremlin. > > I have played Hamlet, I have performed open-heart > surgery, and I have spoken with Elvis. > > But I have not yet gone to college. >
Please note there is a separate forum for College essay, see the forum home to find full list. There are threads with tips pinned to the top.
Very amusing read (how have I never seen this before?)— thank you.