Physicians, parents of physicians, med students: I'd like your thoughts

Parents Forum
1

<p>Our son got his MCAT scores this week, and, while very pleased with the results, seems to be taking a giant step away from applying to med. school. We've never pressured him to apply, but are not sure what is going on in his mind right now. I'd appreciate your thoughts. </p>

<p>Background: He is very smart, very social, delightful to be around. Involved in several activities on campus, always has managed his classes and studying so that he could keep an active social life, attend football and basketball games, etc. He's always easily maintained high grades through high school and college. I think his GPA is somewhere around a 3.85 right now. He had a 4.0 this last semester, and has had a few A- and one B in three years of college. He self studied for a couple of weeks this spring before the June MCATs. He got a 35. His major is biology, with minors in music and business (also has a minor in chemistry due to the premed courses, but can only declare two minors). </p>

<p>He has traveled a reasonable amount with us, and has spent part of the last three summers in Africa. One summer he went on a three week university sponsored trip (business) to South Africa. Last summer he traveled to a clinic that is owned and operated by the med school affiliated with his university to start a project to help the clinic better utilize its resources and equipment. It was a business/finance project that the clinic directors wanted done. This summer he is back at the same clinic finishing that project and also working on a major (medical) research project for the medical school/clinic. </p>

<p>Our family background includes a large number of physicians, so we all know the good, the bad and the ugly of the profession. (His dad, an uncle, both grandfathers, a grand uncle and one great grandfather are/were physicians.) We have gone out of our way to assure him that we are fine with whatever job or profession he wants to pursue. </p>

<p>He is also headstrong and prone to being a bit of an airhead. This summer he is in the middle of rabies treatment (He "met" an unknown dog while on a run (alone! Arg!) in the African countryside), and is on day five of Cipro due to... Ahem... Getting to know the waterborn bacteria of a third world country up close and personal when he and a group of med students didn't plan enough for their water needs while climbing a mountain.</p>

<p>So his facetime call home yeaterday to tell us that 1. He was very happy with his MCAT scores, and 2. He had an epiphany while throwing up and might want to just take a year off after he graduates next spring was both unexpected and expected at the same time. </p>

<p>He's always been of the "I'm not going to declare anything until I've made up my own mind" mindset. Last winter he asked what I would think if he wanted to take a year off after college, and I said that it would depend what his plans were. A year off to travel around the world on our dollar...no. A year off to get a job, or do research, or to do something with a purpose.... Fine. A year to work for awhile to fund his own travels.... Even better.</p>

<p>At one time he said his dream job would be to be Michael Creighton (spelling? the author), to travel the world, and then write scientific based novels. More recently he said he'd really like to work for the World Health Organization someday.</p>

<p>We will need to have a more in depth chat with him when he gets home in August (hopefully in one piece) about his post graduation plans. Can he apply to med school and take a gap year? Would it be better to take time off and then apply? His university offers a one year post undergrad fellowship at the African clinic. I believe he is going to tell us that he wants to apply for that fellowship (which would be wonderful, and we would totally support it), but it is a highly competitive spot, and he needs a plan B if he doesn't get it. I'm worried that his plan B will be something like, "I want to run a marathon on every continent this year." a fun plan, but his running shoes would be writing checks he can't cash.</p>

<p>I'd appreciate any suggestions on specific things a kid like this could do (that we don't have to pay for) if he takes a year off. I'd also appreciate any advice generally on talking to my dear son about his future. </p>

<p>Or do I just need to vent here and keep my mouth shut?</p>

<p>Thanks!</p>

2

<p>I posted this in the Parents Forum because that and the cafe is where I spend all my CC time. If is needs to be moved, that’s OK.</p>

3

<p>We have a cousin whose son graduated college and took a year off before heading for med school. He spent the year off doing research and has just finished his first year of med school. </p>

4

<p>

</p>

<p>Some medical schools will permit him to defer his entry for year, but only for a critical personal situation. (Caretaker of a seriously ill family member, for example.) Others will not permit a deferral under any circumstances.</p>

<p>

</p>

<p>Emphatically yes! </p>

<p>One idea for a gap year–Americorps. There are clinically based service opportunities in both urban and rural communities. Pay isn’t much, but enough to cover most basic living expenses so long as your son doesn’t have champagne tastes.</p>

<p>BTW, he’s already very late if he’ll be applying for fall 2015 admission</p>

5

<p>I deferred for a year because I wasn’t sure about med school (I was definitely not a person who knew they wanted to go into medicine in the cradle), so I did research at a med school for a year, decided I did not want that life, and happily started med school the next fall and had a ball. My reason wasn’t a dire emergency; maybe my school wanted to make sure everyone who wanted to attend wanted to attend. It was a good decision for me. </p>

<p>At that time, most med students went straight to med school from undergrad; we took the MCAT during our junior or senior year, usually with no prep. Nowadays it seems like a lot of students take a year to prep for MCAT, or get more prereqs done, or get job or volunteer experience, or to do their applications, all of which kind of amount to a gap year(though they haven’t done apps yet so wouldn’t need a deferrment). I don’t think your son’s experience will be all that unusual if he waits a year. </p>

6

<p>I think he sounds wonderful, and you should have no worries that he will not spend a “gap” year well. Just make it CLEAR to him that you are not going to fund it. I would limit myself to a chat about “What are you going to do if you don’t get the fellowship? Anything else you can apply for?” You might have a list of possiblities that you email him, signing off with “I’m sure you will find something great!”</p>

<p>My S is one who tended to assume that things would work out in his favor and not have Plan B. He also reacts badly to feeling pushed in any direction. He does things when he is ready to do them. I have found that floating an idea and then shutting up about it has more positive results, often a year or so later. B-) </p>

7

<p>Was he planning originally to apply for September 2015 admission? Those applications opened up June. 1, I believe, and earlier in some states. </p>

<p>Personally, I would support his decision whatever it turns out to be. If he wants to apply now and attend, fine. If he wants to wait until next June to apply…fine.</p>

<p>Medical school is a huge time commitment…and it’s good that he is thinking before just jumping into it.</p>

8

<p>Another physician here. He is much better off waiting to apply when he really wants to. I know of some who wait despite good/excellent credentials. Much more common now than in my day. </p>

<p>Our gifted son of two physicians never had interest in medicine and got a comp sci job after college instead of math grad school (double major). He said he was tired of going to school, makes a good income and isn’t into money. He is currently being intellectually satisfied with his work. I can see where a PhD doesn’t yield jobs from knowing people. I can also see where it is better to take a break from the action. Who knows- your son may change his mind and do something different. Better now than after spending more years of his life. </p>

<p>Your job is to make peace with yourself and your son’s decisions. That is hard to do. Kudos for not supporting him in just any activities. For your son it may be best to get off the track and take a break. He’ll either be a better and happier physician or a happier whatever path he takes. Medical school is not now or never.</p>

9

<p>WayOutWestMom, thanks for the Americorps idea, and for clarifying that there is no such thing as a deferral/gap year.</p>

<p>Frankly, I have no idea whether he originally was planning to apply for 2015, or whether he had started that process. I know he didn’t want to think about the MCAT during the school year, which was why he took it in June, in a brief slot between finals and leaving for Africa. </p>

<p>As I’m writing this, I’m realizing that the “casual” chat we had last winter about taking a year off was, in his mind, a more solid indication of his post graduation plans than I heard at the time. </p>

<p>(I suddenly feel like I’m journaling to clarify my thoughts… Only on a public, online forum, instead of in a notebook.)</p>

<p>So really we are now looking to guide him towards post graduate plans using the Consolation method: “floating an idea and then shutting up about it”.</p>

<p>Thank you all.</p>

10

<p>The gap year(s) can be a fabulous & productive idea for some pre-meds. </p>

<p>Neither of my Ds went straight from undergrad to med school. </p>

<p>D1 took 3 years off in between . She wasn’t a pre med so after graduation she worked and did her pre-reqs part-time. D2 had all her pre-reqs, but spent 2 years as a clinical research asst at a med school after graduation. Her experiences there convinced her once and for all that she didn’t want to do a MD/PhD.</p>

<p>So for both, the gap years were productive and useful. They both gained maturity and insights about what was important to them. </p>

11

<p>OP, DS was unsure about med school when he was your S’s age.</p>

<p>Thinking back, I think it is likely good for him because the road AFTER getting into med school is long, challenging. and sometimes tiring. Many young people may not be willing to get into this especially before they feel they are “ready” to commit to this career path.</p>

<p>One of DS’s classmates got out of med school after less than a year and attended the CS grad program at Stanford instead.</p>

<p>Do not laugh at it: We purchased some tuition insurance for med school but not for UG. We were very sure that he would not regret going through all years at a college but were not so sure about med school. After all, college is more fun to most youngsters. (We just paid the tuitions for the second to the last semester the other day. “We” means DS and us here.)</p>

<p>Isn’t it true that more than 1/3 (?) of practicing physicians regret going into this career? It is hard work.</p>

12

<p>One of my sisters took 2 years off in between undergrad and med school, another went straight through. I personally took 15 years in between, but would not recommend that as a “plan”. I’d say the short amount of time in between undergrad and med school is now the preferred plan for a lot of students, and for the med schools. Peace corps seems like it might be a great option for your son.</p>

13

<p>My DD just graduated and has several friends aiming for med school. None of them applied right from college. They are working research assistant jobs, working a surgical techs, phlebotomists, etc. and planning to apply this summer or next. I think at this point in time the majority of med school students take at least a year between college and med school. </p>

14

<p>There are ways to work in world health that do not involve med school. Academic degrees geared to world health, here or abroad, may eventually appeal to him. Your son seems to be a person who will find his way. </p>

15

<p>Let him take the gap year. He has a lot more school in front of him. Americorps sounds great, maybe City Year? To help kids in danger of dropping out of school? I bet there are programs in Africa, public health programs, too. He can always work on a kibbutz and learn Hebrew----people still do that. City Year pays a modest stipend, so it isn’t a mom and dad pay for this thing. The kibbutz programs require work for language lessons. </p>

<p>There are plenty of programs out there. And he may have an idea of what he wants to do. He could always work somewhere different, like at a ski resort ( we had a thread on this earlier).</p>

16

<p>Since the application process is almost a year long, it will be like two years. Some schools really love Americorp, city Year, Peace Corp. He could also work with US populations in order to show he has a solid grasp f the US healthcare systems. Research would be great as well if that is currently lacking.
One small concern is that with the new MCAT a few schools are reducing the years that his excellent score will be allowed. More information will be coming out from schools over this year, but that is a genuine concern. He may need to study and retake if he waits too long. Quite a few schools are not going to accept scores for the traditional three years. </p>

17

<p>Thank you, everyone. Lots of excellent information and advice.</p>

18

<p>I took a year off between college and medical school because I didn’t get interested in medicine until mid sophomore year. I worked as a lab tech. Once I got to med school it was so clear to me what a privilege it was to be in this setting being taught all of this info. I never again took my education for granted, and saw the same pattern in other students who took time off before starting. </p>

19

<p>Reading with great interest as my oldest has planned a gap year. She’s been a research assistant this summer and was just asked to co-author the paper and continue the research. I think this will be invaluable experience, and she LOVES it, and is excited by the whole process. She’s taking the MCAT in August and has been studying all summer, hopefully it will all work out! She will graduate in may 2015, and hopefully apply for the next year med schools, and finish out her research, or do something else fulfilling (and not on my dime : )</p>