<p>Greetings! I'd appreciate some help with my college essays. </p>
<p>I wrote my first essay about contracting Type II Diabetes and the positive impact it had on my life. I had it up on another website, and I got equal amounts of positive and negative feedback. Some people said it was touching, but other people said that it didn't say enough about me as a person, or that it fell short in execution. </p>
<p>So I wrote a second essay about my experience this year tutoring a girl in Latin. I tried to keep this one lighter. This is supposed to play more into my passions because I want to be a Latin teacher. </p>
<p>If you have an opinion, please give it. If you need to read them to give an educated opinion, or if you just feel like being helpful, please say so and I'll gladly PM it to you.</p>
<p>Tutoring. Shows more personalism with leadership.</p>
<p>Thank you for your opinion :)</p>
<p>i can read through if you want</p>
<p>Thank you. I've sent them along.</p>
<p>So sorry it took me so long. I was actually on vacation with my parents and didn't have an access to a computer for almost a week. I would choose the tutoring essay as well. It is better crafted and I think it gives more indirect insight into who you are as a person.</p>
<p>I appreciate the advice of everyone on the board who took the trouble to read my essay. However, I had some friends, my guidance councelor, parents, and teachers look at it too. Most of the adults whom I trust, as well as a VERY good reviewer here pointed out some critical reasons my Diabetes essay the way to go. So, I decided to stick with that. I feel lile the advice I received helped polish it nicely. Now I would really appreciate if anyone would like to read it, and help me tighten it up further.</p>
<p>I can read it if you need an advice. However, don't just throw away the one about teaching. The applications aren't available yet and you may find this one fit better some of the topics. It's always good to have a cover.</p>
<p>Thank you! I've sent it along via PM</p>