Planning a gap year 3 years in advance?

<p>My daughter is nearing the end of her first year in high school. She has been able to keep up with her music, make all-county, area all-state and an outside college youth orchestra. But she also wants to do well in school and really enjoys some other outside activities that take up a lot of time. She agrees with me she will probably have to give some of this up next year, because she is constantly exhausted which causes anxiety and anger when things don't go as planned. She says she can keep going at this pace, and will finish out this year, but there's no fun in it. I just posted on another thread recently how my daughter does all these things, and a well informed person posted how something would have to give. I think they're right. </p>

<p>Knowing I often come and ask questions on CC after she goes to bed :) she asked me tonight to ask if anyone has ever actually planned in advance to take a gap year and in this way planned a music schedule with a little less rigor while in high school in order to enjoy and take up some other EC's, classes and activities in HS. Now, she would still continue to practice at a level that puts her into the area all-state realm and hopefully conference all-
state when she can try out for that, but she'd cut back on a few hours a week in order to keep up with school and other EC's that will broaden her horizons. She would still try out and want to stay in outside orchestra, Pit orchestra and Wind Ensemble. </p>

<p>I asked her what she would do in that gap year? She told me she would take some money out of her savings, get a car so she could get a part time job, maybe upgrade her instrument, and probably keep taking lessons with her private teacher she has now but also because we live near Syracuse and about an hour from Rochester and an hour in a half from
Ithaca she would search out another excellent teacher to also study with. Then, she would audition for the following year at some top schools/conservatories and see what happens. If it didn't hurt her chance for scholarships or Freshman standing, she may also take a couple
of college classes nearby. We know a girl that graduated last year and is attending Belmont. She thinks this is a terrible idea! That's ok, I'm glad she was honest with my daughter! She thinks it will just give DD a reason to slack off with music. I can see this POV. I have always been against gap years for some kids just because a lot of them end up not following through with their plan, yet my husband took a gap year just because he was clueless about what he wanted to do, and that gap year working convinced him he needed to go to college
and he excelled all the way through grad school.</p>

<p>While I'm happy daughter is thinking about her future, I'm not sure if planning in this way is
a good idea. I said to her if a gap year wasn't in the cards, what would the plan be? She said she'd definitely stick with music and have to drop a lot of other things which are also enjoyable. She says she wants to decide by the end of the summer. And she said it's not just things other then music-- she loved playing in Pit, three instruments as a Freshman, but it really messed up her normal practice schedule for three months.</p>

<p>redeye41, I have a freshman in h.s. and a freshman in college. Both music kids. All I have to say is a lot can happen with interests in high school. Older kid is a double music major and we were sure he would do academics with music until junior year. He is a comp. and performance double major and did not begin composing seriousing until summer before junior year. While we think my younger one is going down the music road and are doing everything to give him opportunities to make him ready for this path we are also trying to leave the door open should he wish to explore some other interests. Last year in addition to violin he was very interested in sound recording. This year he is now more singularly centered on violin. When he was younger he spent tons of time composing and now not so much. I would be concerned about having a long term plan at this point other than a sort of vague one. I say try and enjoy the journey and see where it gets you and let her try things she is interested in in addition to her music. But I will say whatever they are interested at the time we have done everything possibile to give them opportunities in that area.</p>

<p>redeye41, My other thought is make sure she is working with a teacher who is teaching her to practice smarter and this does not always mean putting in more time but knowing how to work on something in an effective manner is key. Of course they need to put in the time but not all practice time is equal.</p>

<p>redeye41,
I agree with cellocompmom that a lot can happen between freshman year and senior year. I have three children who are out of HS and each time I was amazed at how much growing and development occurs between ages 15 and 19. They look so mature, but they are still so young. Now when I walk by my local HS I have perspective and they do indeed still look like babies. </p>

<p>When my daughter was your daughter’s age she sat my DH and I down and told us she wanted to focus all her energy on dance and become a ballerina. Later on in HS she switched from dance to theater. She is now on her way to becoming a nurse practitioner with a focus on having her own practice for adult primary care. Things change.</p>

<p>I am a huge fan of gap years for certain kids. But I think that gap years should be structured. There needs to be a concrete plan that involves travel or a program or some experience that gets the child out into the wider world to help them gain perspective. Kids who have gap years seem to return to college that much more mature and ready to embrace all that college has to offer.</p>

<p>If I had one suggestion and this is HUGE, it would be to work with your daughter to keep her stress and anxiety under control. I used to tell my youngest that his job was to get through HS mentally healthy and happy. It helps to put HS in perspective. He was fortunate to have two siblings to show him that you don’t have to do it all in HS in order to be successful as an adult. My daughter hated science in HS and decided not to take any science classes at all her senior year. My middle son, for complicated reasons relating to his health, did not do high school. He was failing across the board until his senior year. Now he is a deans-list math major and judging by his acceptance to competitive summer programs he is doing extremely well. For what ever reason we have created this insane culture where we tell kids they better do it all in HS or else they will fall off the rail-road tracks and never be able to get back on. But learning is not a linear process. Kids can fail and pick themselves up. They can try new things and go off in a different direction and then change course. They can decide they want to be a rock-star and later on work for NASA and help land the Mars Rover. They can be an engineer and then decide they want to compose music (I have a neighbor who did exactly that). Learning does not stop after HS and college. Learning is a life-long endeavor. Teach your daughter to learn and do music for herself and for the joy she gets out of it rather than the awards and the grades and you will be giving her a life-time gift of mental health.</p>

<p>It isn’t easy to combat all the pressures on these kids to be overachievers. But remember HS is just HS. Most of us are not known for our accomplishments in HS, nor would we want to be.</p>

<p>I think your daughter is on the right track, and it is great that you are listening to her and having discussions. It is very important to me to keep my daughter from entering into a “tunnel” too early in life. We know a couple of young musicians who by the age of 12 have decided that music is their future and have poured all of their extra time & energy into practice, practice, musical activities, practice. It may very well be that one has to do this nowadays if one wants to ‘make it’ on certain instruments but I hope not. </p>

<p>Making music goes far beyond technique, and it seems to me (a nonmusical person, so take this for what it’s worth) that if someone hasn’t experienced a range of ideas, emotions, and interests - down the road the music isn’t going to resonate with any depth or meaning. Music takes a lot of time and dedication, and I don’t mean to imply that someone can just do all sorts of other ‘stuff’ and then think technique will take care of itself. Of course a young musician must practice, work with a great teacher, play or sing in ensembles, and practice some more. </p>

<p>However, a musician must also read literature, learn about science, dance, play sports, travel (even a visit to a local historical sight can open our eyes, we don’t need to fly to Europe as much as we all would like to!), spend time in nature, play with her brother, etc. It makes life more interesting, and that alone is reason enough to expand our horizons. It also may lead a young person to their “path” in life, a path which may be as a full time musician or someone who has the richness of a musical background.</p>

<p>I also have a 9th grade daughter, and she is planning on taking a gap year. We don’t know what that will include at this point, but it is giving us the gift of time. Time to have my daughter take an art class and continue with dance classes while still spending significant time on her instrument this year. Time to do well in her studies (we’re not AP-hyper, though). Time to keep up her music while still deciding how ‘serious’ she wants to become. As she makes decisions about music, she’ll adjust her time and activities accordingly. </p>

<p>In our situation, the gap year may be used for intense practice & auditions if DD decides to try the top-music-school route, or it may be spent taking a class or two at a local college, working part time, and continuing to practice for pleasure. She may ultimately decide that she doesn’t want a gap year. Nothing is set in stone, but it has given her some breathing room and that will help her make the best decision for her as she continues to grow. </p>

<p>I would encourage your daughter to allow herself to plan on a gap year. She will still be making decisions as she goes along. For example, by the end of the summer she may need to evaluate if she is still able to commit the time to three instruments. There’s no right or wrong answer. Enjoy the journey!</p>

<p>A gap year is a good idea for some and not for others. </p>

<p>I know one young man who graduated HS last year (incredibly smart) and took a gap year this year. He was hoping he would get to write his opus (ok, not opus, but the novel that will set him on his writing career). He is not happy being home, bored - not writing enough, misses the social interaction and going to college next year. The gap year never clicked for him. </p>

<p>I know a different young man who pushed against his parents and did not take a gap year…he is doing well enough at college, but not totally happy with is choice. He and his parents are considering a gap year next year (maybe amriacore). Not sure it would have been any different if he had taken the gap year before college, but we are all doubtful that he will graduate from the school he is currently going to in 4 years. Something is likely to change.</p>

<p>Neither of my kids did a gap year. They are both music majors in different schools and they are both straight out crazy busy (like all the other kids who’s parents post here) and they love it.</p>

<p>Keep the gap year as an option and be flexible…luckily you don’t have to make that decision now.</p>

<p>I know a young man who planned ahead for a gap year. He used it to move to a major city where he spent the year taking lessons from an excellent private teacher to prepare his auditions for top conservatories. It seems to have worked as he later attended Curtis.</p>

<p>What you are running into is common with kids thinking of going into music. A generation ago kids could be ‘okay’ musicians in high school and still expect to get into top level music schools, that it isn’t for the most part true today. It is different by instrument, but for the most part, it is requiring dedication at younger and younger ages. The problem is, the dedication to music clashes with what has happened in schools, where anxiety and other factors have made them ramp up the pressure on kids, between where taking AP classes is seen as ‘critical’, and of course, substituting teaching quality with a ton of homework each night. Even kids not doing music find themselves up until 2am finishing everything, because then there is the incredible pressure to have all these EC’s and so forth,that didn’t exist when I went to high school…and if you try to do the two, it seems impossible. To be brutally honest, you can’t have it all, kids for the most part end up having to make choices, compromises, and usually either the music or the academics has to take something of a back seat. There are some kids who do both, but from personal experience, I wonder what kind of shape they are in emotionally, the things I have had reported that these kids say to their friends and such isn’t so positive…</p>

<p>In any event, on to the OP…Leaving out the gap year (more on that in a bit), I highly recommend not pulling back on the music if she thinks she may want to ‘get serious’ about it. One thing I have learned about music instruction and levels of playing, is that trying to ‘cram it in’ in a year, like a gap year, is likely to fail (not the concept of the gap year, but rather, music is kind of a placeholder, then in gap year they cram in the practicing and such to bring the level way, way up)…it won’t work IMO. I don’t fully know why, but there is no substitute for putting the effort in all along, it is just something you can’t ‘cram in’, and age has something to do with it, it just seems the earlier you get up to speed, the better. If your D is right now thinking of getting serious, then she needs to focus on her musical stuff that really drives her forward (and also helpfully gives her pleasure). If the youth orchestra she is in is really driving her, teaching her the skills and such of being in an ensemble, then it is worthwhile keeping it up. If All State, All Region and so forth is something she enjoys doing, meeting other kids, etc, that is good, if it is something that her school music teachers want her to do, I would consider dropping it (among other things, All State and such will have very little to no impact on getting into a music school).
There is a benefit to those music programs, if your D does decide to go academic so to speak, having music is going to be a big plus as an ec, that I am sure of…so they could be a hedge, if they don’t take up too much time that could be spent on the core issues of practice and driving her skill level up, they prob are worth keeping IMO.</p>

<p>And yes, it isn’t easy, because so much goes against conventional wisdom (which Einstein claimed were prejudices learned before the age of 18…) . We faced that on our end, as my kid got serious on an uber competitive instrument, and in the end school and doing what they needed to do were too much and we ended up as more then a few music families did, homeschooled, to get him away from the rigid schedule and other downsides of standard schools…plenty of people are all gloom and doom, but the reality is, anyone thinking of going into music is going to face that kind of attitude, given how bloody hard it is and relatively financially cloudy it is. </p>

<p>Okay, but what about the rest? Here are my thoughts:</p>

<p>-I realize there is this incredible pressure these days to cram schedules full of AP and other high level academic courses, that you ‘need this’ to get into top schools and I question that in the first place; but secondly, as a serious music student, with a resume showing you have been, schools recognize that there is no one size fits all. If you were non music, and taking a relatively easy schedule, it would hurt you, but colleges aren’t stupid, they look at the whole package and realize the difference. It is like the kids who do EC’s because they look good on a resume, colleges can figure that out, too…they know what it takes to study music seriously, and it counts. </p>

<p>I would recommend looking at her school day, her planned schedule, and seeing what can be removed. It might be limiting AP and honors classes, it might be cutting back other EC’s, it all depends. I agree with others, more then they probably will know from what I am going to write, that kids need things to fulfill them, to make them happy, to learn about life. But to be honest, the current system of dumping heavy duty academics on them by the bucketful and pressuring them to do scores of EC’s isn’t doing that, either, since in many cases, it isn’t what fulfils the kid, it is what makes the parents and guidance counselors happy, assuming it is going to make admissions officers happy…</p>

<p>Hopefully music brings a lot to the kids doing it, and there is room for other things. I would recommend pruning back the academic side, taking the path a little less well travelled, and have faith the kid will do okay no matter what, and they probably will. That doesn’t mean taking an idiot lesson load in high school or doing nothing but music, but it means maintaining an academic schedule that balances out with the need/desire to do music.</p>

<p>Going to get some heat on this one, but seriously think about cutting back on school music programs if she otherwise has outside programs like youth symphony and so forth. School music directors will hate me for saying this, but a lot of the high level students don’t play in the school music programs, because they take time during the school day, and quite honestly, usually do little for the high level students, it is usually more about serving the needs of the school music director. The thing is, ultimately it is your D’s life, and her job isn’t to make the school music director look good or help guarantee funding for music, as tempting as that sounds. If your D is getting something out of it, likes it, that is great, but in the end it is about what is best for her…and time is precious as it is.</p>

<p>Okay, now the original question, the gap year. I would not plan on that as a ‘5th year’ the way your D is thinking, I would treat it as a possible contingency. As I wrote above, if you do ‘okay’ with your musical studies in the last x years of high school, and then count on using that year to bring yourself up to speed by cramming in a lot of work, it is not likely to work. With music school admissions these days, the difference between those who get in and those who don’t is very, very small, it is in extreme levels of technique, it is the difference between excellent and superior in many cases. </p>

<p>A gap year works where someone is at a high level IME, but it just missing that last little stretch between accepted and rejected, where they just need to make it to ‘that next level’, not 2 or 3 or 4 levels. Keep in mind it isn’t a year, let’s assume school ends in June and the kid suddenly starts their 'gap year…well, for one, they only have maybe 5, 6 months to get their pre screens in…and maybe 8 months until auditions…if they need that much work, where they are two levels away from needed level, trying to get that done in a short period like that is impossible…but polishing for the pre screen and the actual auditions is possible.</p>

<p>Obviously, this is just my opinion, based on the experiences and what I have seen. In the end, you have to follow your own instincts based on who your D is:). </p>

<p>@good books- What you say is true, as Charlie Parker said “You can’t put it through the horn if you haven’t lived it”…I have sat through recitals where some little prodigy, aged 11, is playing Sarasate’s Carmen Fantasy, and it is obvious they don’t have a clue what the music is about…</p>

<p>That said, though, in a perfect world kids would be well rounded, including music students, and the audition experience would be a sum of who they are, but it often isn’t. Having just gone through the audition process, I can tell you that in many cases (and this is high level music schools all), what they are looking for is damn near perfect technique, and the rest, musicality, expression, stage presence, is often at most a plus…it depends on the school, it depends on the instrument, it depends on the people on the panel, but a lot of it isn’t potential and other attributes, it is technical perfection (and I don’t think that is a particularly good thing, for a lot of reasons; it is a very ivory tower look at music, that leaves out that it is an art form, and while critics and music teachers go ga ga over perfect technique, audiences don’t…). But it is what most teachers are telling their students and it is what is getting kids into music programs for the most part. There are always exceptions, the incredibly musical kid who intrigues a teacher, the program that goes against the grain and is lookng for a ‘full musician’, but it isn’t the reality, sadly. </p>

<p>It is why you will hear on here with music students potentially to be, don’t listen to guidance counselors, I don’t believe what I have heard them say, they for the most part know zero about what music school is like or what it takes to get in, they are still in 'oh, music is a great hobby, sideline, you do the academic drill in High School, and then if you are (still dumb enough) to want to go into music, then you can apply to music schools, and all your academic work will be in your favor to get in (this is a pastiche of various snippets, but you get the idea)</p>

<p>Agree with musicprnt and others. Just to add a bit to what other have said:</p>

<p>–9th grade was not a typical high school year. There were no APs yet, so all the students were taking the same classes. Teachers prepared everyone to take AP classes, so instruction was well above grade level. Beginning in 10th grade (since my daughter is aiming to be a musician, she took no AP classes) there was less homework. Still too much.</p>

<p>–There are many ways musicians show their interest in becoming professional musicians during high school–concerto competitions, winning a few of them, participation in youth orchestras and summer programs–that cannot be made up in one gap year.</p>

<p>–I agree with the suggestion to have your daughter drop her high school ensemble program, if she is finding school too much. She has her youth orchestra.</p>

<p>There are some good ideas here, especially ways to trim back on some of the ensembles. I think some of what I wrote in my philosophical ramble may have been a bit misunderstood, so just want to hop on again to clarify a bit. </p>

<p>I know the reality is that music is an intense, competitive field. I don’t think a gap year could be successfully used to make up for years of musical neglect. I certainly expect any student interested in keeping the option open to pursue a musical career would spend many, many hours practicing during all of the high school years. A gap year could then help cap off the practice, not be used for catch-up. It would also give more time for the audition schedule which seems to be a very time-intensive undertaking. </p>

<p>If a student has an interest in having a gap year (as the OP’s daughter has expressed), then it could help in planning purposes for pacing oneself. In another post Redeye41 was concerned that her daughter may not have time to take art, computer science, or pursue other interests due to the graduation requirements in NYS combined with intensive musical study. I guess I sort of melded the two posts together in my response, trying to help the OP and her daughter find the right balance. Again, no right or wrong, no black or white. Good discussion.</p>

<p>Yes, goodbooks, one thought is that it would make audition season easier. DD would definitely not slack off with practice in HS, but would allow herself to participate in more outside things and explore different courses, activities and have maybe a little more of a social life. We would make sure that she kept to a schedule (with private teacher’s help) that would keep her competitive, but maybe that extra year would help her reach even higher. It’s still just a thought.</p>

<p>I think that some kids who are really interested in pursuing music actually participate less and less in the music classes or activities at school, and do more and more outside. Pit band takes a lot of time and is a nice way to socialize while also contributing, but as the years go by she might want to drop this kind of thing in favor of practice or her orchestral work outside of school. Just a thought.</p>

<p>It seems to me that she is using the fantasy idea of gap year to resolve some conflicts. The thing is, these conflicts are not going to go away, but will only increase.</p>

<p>She is still too young to make certain decisions. If she is truly drawn to other areas of interest, she could follow them while at the same time still practicing and performing music at whatever level is possible- as you say. Who knows, maybe she will end up loving theater, or computer science, or writing, or sports.</p>

<p>At the other end of the spectrum, at some point, if she is convinced that music is the only thing she wants to do, she will have to drop other things. (Some music kids don’t even go to school!) </p>

<p>It is too bad that that decision time needs to be so early, but if she wants to major in music for a BA, rather than apply to a top conservatory for a BM, things may work out after high school years with more diverse interests.</p>

<p>Maybe a gap year will be a great idea when she gets there. She cannot really tell right now. The idea is giving her some wiggle room in her head, to deal with the present overwhelming demands of her life. I hope she can stop thinking about the future so much and figure out how to make the present less stressful and more enjoyable.</p>

<p>Musicprnt, that was one of the best posts I’ve read on this board, and hits the nail on the head. I read the top post, and as someone who took a year off to get ready for auditions (though it occurred between undergrad and my master’s), I thought I’d be well-suited to talk, but you hit pretty much everything. All that you wrote really lines up with my experience in professional music.</p>

<p>It’s early to know, but is your daughter talking about conservatory or college?</p>

<p>It sounds to me like this is a kid who has more wide-ranging interests and might regret cutting other activities out in favor of total focus on music.</p>

<p>Eliminating stress is a good idea, period. Looking at the class schedule with a critical eye, and dropping some music EC’s (pit band, all state, school ensemble are all possible cuts) can restore enough respite to help her figure herself out.</p>

<p>Unless she changes in the next year or two, it sounds like college with either a music major or another major and lots of music extracurriculars might work very well for her.</p>

<p>If this is a disappointing prospect, and she really feels dedicated to music, then soon that needs to be a very intense focus, yes, even at this young age.</p>

<p>I have one who did all kinds of music in high school and was admitted to great conservatories, but chose a college BA music program because she does still have a lot of other academic interests. She didn’t choose until April 30th senior year, the deadline to decide.</p>

<p>I have another child who was so devoted to dance that she skipped about 1/3 of her junior year (kept up at home) and didn’t do senior year at all. She got her GED and later an online diploma. Then she changed her mind and went to college for a year. Now she isn’t dancing at all.</p>

<p>In both cases, although their academics were fine, their respective performing arts were very instrumental in admissions and more than made up for a few missing EC’s and classes.So it is important to realize that if your daughter wants to focus intensely on music at the expense of school classes, this won’t necessarily hurt admissions chances. Colleges respect dedication. In fact, the GED my child got was seen as proof of commitment and dedication, at every school, and admissions officers said that they loved “outliers.”</p>

<p>Anyway, just be ready for a lot of changes in the next years- and I mean 10 years not 3!</p>

<p>Right now she’s talking conservatory, but as you said it’s early. Her school’s music programs are very good, and she really enjoys them. If it were up to her, she’d take one less science and one less math, but it isn’t an option. She actually wanted to keep the science and take two maths during the next two summers to get them out of the way, but I’m finding out NY doesn’t allow this. Her cousin in NJ took Geometry the summer after 8th grade online and it was counted and he has moved on to the next math. It drives her crazy to be bogged down with so much homework each night, and that NY is so inflexible. I think she would be shocked, and so would her teachers, if I told her to drop music in school. Her small school sends many kids onto music Ed and performance programs, even some that have never played in an outside group. A recent grad was named “Freshman of the Year” at a commercial music program a few years back. I went to the same school, years ago, and 3 members of my class have found steady work in orchestras, one in an army band. Two are music teachers. But we didn’t have all of the Regents requirements back then, either, so more music choices could be put into the schedule. My younger daughter has an IEP because of a diagnosed learning disability. She will not have to get the Regents diploma and will therefore not have all of the requirements, but she’s not interested in being in music. She’s younger and at this point wants to be a top chef. The school has already told me courses outside of school she can take, for credit, to reach this goal! But only because she’s not strictly held to the Regents requirements, which are ridiculous.</p>

<p>Does New York allow online classes at schools like Virtual High School? Or community college?</p>

<p>I will PM you about another idea.</p>

<p>@tuba Thanks, I tried to distill what I have learned through the past 6 or 7 years with my kid, who just finished the audition cycle and is now waiting to hear. I think my S is lucky in that he was exposed very early to the craziness that is music at a serious level, and realized if he wanted to do it on any kind of level what it would take. If he had listened to guidance counselors and to some of his early teachers, he would have gotten nowhere, they held to views that might have been true 30 years ago but aren’t today…</p>

<p>Redeye, it always comes down to a matter of priorities with all of this, and no one can or should tell you ‘what you must do’, all we can do is offer alternatives. Stress is a big factor, and school music programs can be a source of joy or can be an obstacle…for example, kid is expected to do pit band, they have mandatory rehearsal schedule, and the kid has outside music stuff that conflicts with it, and the person running pit band is like ‘no exceptions’ (my S ran into that one)…or the kid is good in music, and the music people at the school, glad to have a good student, push them into every ensemble and such they have…you get the drift. The key always has to be what drives your D, what makes her move forward and yep, makes her happy. If leaving the school music program would make her unhappy, less fulfilled, then maybe something else can go. If the outside youth orchestra isn’t doing it for her, drop that…there is no right path. My S did that all along, it is a journey in of itself. He was in a very top level youth orchestra, and enjoyed it, but felt that the time commitment was too much, and felt that he had enough with other programs he was in, that he wasn’t losing much in dropping it, and the gain in practice time and even some rest time made it worth it. Conflicts happen, just ask anyone scheduling college auditions:).</p>

<p>One thing I emphasize, and I can’t emphasize it enough, it is likely the decisions you make will not be life threatening. There are certain things, like if she even thinks she wants to go to school for music, that she maintain as high a level as possible, that I think are critical, but how you/she does that is not fixed in stone. All kinds of people will tell you “well, of course you have to do X”, they will tell you that if your D pulls back a bit on the academics then decides to do an academic admit, that it will kill her chances and that is hogwash, admissions people aren’t that narrow (as unfortunately the people who give advice sometimes are) and your D’s dedication to music won’t hurt her, they make allowances, they realize that a kid doing all that music,l the YO’s, school programs, etc, is not a slacker, unlike high school guidance counselors and parents, they know music done like that isn’t a ‘hobby’…and many schools have orchestras and ensembles, and even if she decides to major in accounting, will love to have her in their ensembles and it can help them in admissions:). </p>

<p>You are going to hear naysayers, ask the music parents who homeschool about that one, you are going to hear it will hurt their ‘well roundedness’, that they need to ‘explore everything’, and while that is well meaning, it also isn’t true across the board. Homeschool kids are generally as sociable and socialized as kids who went to school, and they often don’t have some of the negatives faced in schools, the cliquism, bullying, etc that goes on (that any parent who tells me that is part of the learning experience, I would love to put my size 12 foot in a certain place…). You will hear if she does music, that academic schools will think she isn’t qualified, I have heard it all, and I also have gotten to know a lot of kids who dedicated themselves to music, changed their minds, and got into Ivies even without 10 APS and so forth (they have great grades, don’t get me wrong, just that t hey didn’t meet the ‘maniac’ level of things)…</p>

<p>I have not found anywhere that says NY allows virtual High school, and the school GC said no, but I went searching on the NY Ed website and believe I found where they say if a Principal believes the course matches up sufficiently in curriculum to a regents course it can be counted if the Principal allows it. This provision seems to be mainly there so that kids moving in from other states can receive credit for what they’ve done at their out of state school, but it leaves an opening… Maybe. Our Principal is pretty easy going and understanding, too, so maybe I’ll talk to him directly.</p>

<p>This was how it was done in MA also. The principal approved the online classes and also approved the level: AP, college prep etc. Our principal was so impressed that he got funding to join Virtual High School and our school now offers 25 spots for 25 students to take an online class. Our school is small and this not only offers classes that would never be available (Latin, Detective Fiction, Comparative Religion, Zoology, you name it) but solves scheduling problems. You can tell your principal that Virtual High School is used by many excellent high school (I originally found it on a bulletin board at a top regional school) as part of their formal curriculum offerings. </p>

<p>Our principal was wonderful in understanding the demands of music, dance and other performing arts. As long as students kept up with their work, he allowed them to miss some school for classes, rehearsals and performances. It sounds like your principal might be open to some alternatives to make life less stressful for your daughter, while still allowing her to achieve what she wants to achieve.</p>

<p>Redeye41-As a parent/teacher who raised 3 kid in the state, I can say that some NYS school districts have used on-line courses for years now- but those offered through a connection with an area university. My eldest took an AP Euro course that way back in the 90s because his school didn’t offer it. That said, no one outside of NY cares about a “Regent’s Diploma” in any form- they get the course descriptions along with the grades when transcripts are sent. There are many excellent private schools in the state who don’t even offer Regent’s Diplomas, preferring to set their own standards higher and at least one top-rated large district I know of has been doing everything in their power to “break away” from under the thumb of the Board of Regents so that they can also set their own standards, which would be higher, with a broader range of courses than set down by the state. I’ve not found that principals are willing to “compare” courses and give credit for anything that is not labeled “Regent’s” though, so classes graduate kids who move in from other states or transfer in from private schools, giving them “local” diplomas- trust me, it doesn’t keep them out of top colleges if they have the needed grades and ECs.
As others have said here, it really IS possible to “do it all” while in HS, and I can tell you that it can be done in New York State. It’s a matter of knowing what serves the student’s needs best and what can be passed over. My D took all Honors, AP and Dual-Credit courses, while participating in the musicals, Show Choir, soccer and outside vocal and theatrical productions. At times, she had two shows on stage and one in rehearsal, worked a PT retail job and sang a Sunday church gig. She graduated at the top of her class and had enough AP credits (all 5s on the exams) and college credits to cover all of her gen eds when she went to college for a performance BM degree. What did she give up? Sleep for one, but that was her choice (one of those “internally driven” kids!), Show Choir and the school musical in senior year (she had leads the other years and those would have overtaxed her voice during the conservatory audition process), All- County and All-State in senior years (they fell during audition season too), and soccer after 10th grade. She learned to make critical choices and to budget time, skills that served her well in college.
It’s not too early for your D to look at colleges that interest her and check on requirements. Let her enjoy her freshman year but also make sure that the GC and administration are aware that she may require some curriculum adaptations in future years.</p>