Please Grade my SAT essay

Test Preparation SAT Preparation
1

<p>Assignment : Is censorship sometimes justified ?</p>

<p>My Essay (I typed it exactly as i wrote it , even though i noticed the grammatical errors)-</p>

<p>Censorship is by definition , a violation of a person's free will . It denies him the basic right to express his opinion and watch or read what he wants to .
In any typical family , parents do not want children to be exposed to explicit content . But in restricting them from doing so , they only increase their curiosity and likelihood of the children to explore it themselves . This leads to a gap between the parents and children in terms of communication which is exacerbated with secrecy and rebellion .
If parents gave the children all the information on the content they don't want them watching , and explain why they should not be watching it , it will lead to trust and understanding in the family , and won't leave the children confused .
In the past , monarchies and dictatorships used censorship as an effective tool to restrict the public to information on the working and administration of the government .
In this way , the public would remain ignorant and the oppressors would rule over them without much conflict . This idea , might be temporarily effective ,but it never works out in the long run , and is against the spirit of democracy.
The effect of censorship is felt by people today as well . The People's Republic of North Korea is ruled over by the oppressor Kim Jong Un , who has completely restricted the freedom of the citizens .One example is that the internet is not accessible to the public . This can cause many consequences . North Korea will be far behind compared to the rest of the world in terms of technology and development and its citizens are pushed back in time , having to put much more effort for everyday tasks which could otherwise be simplified with technology .
Therefore, upon consideration of censorship in the past , today , as well as in homes everywhere , it is seen that it causes more harm than it intends to prevent .
Censorship is effective only on a temporary basis and only exacerbates the situation in the long run</p>

2

<p>OP, I’d give you a 2. You seem to have a limited vocabulary and tend to reuse words again and again. I see multiple grammatical errors and have just one example, which is not even concrete. You might get a 3 here on the real thing though.</p>

3

<p>Seriously ? I thought I’d get at least 4</p>

4

<p>Yeah, it’s bad. It would much more likely get a score of 3/6 than 2/6, though.</p>

5

<p>Ok , how about this one ?</p>

<p>Assignment : Do you need knowledge of the past to fully understand the present ?</p>

<p>My Essay -
A Knowledge of the past is a necessary part of everyone’s lives as it influences our actions today in every way possible . Evidence of this can be seen in literature as well as history</p>

<p>In Terry Pratchett’s " Making Money ", Moist Von Lipwig is a former conman who has been assigned the role of bank manager of the Royal Mint by the Patrician of Ankh-Morpork .Despite his relinquishment of his former ways and his succes as post master general , the patrician notices that during a meeting with him , Moist still steals his secretary’s pencil . Character is something that is built over time , and here it is seen that despite his fame and success , he still feels empowered in deception . Another point to support this is that Moist utilizes his eloquence and conniving behavior in gaining success in his new job , in a similar way to how he conned money off people in the past .</p>

<p>Another example is that of Arthur Dent in the book “So long … And thanks for the fish” . In this book , Arthur is back on earth after many perilous escapades across the galaxy which he unwillingly endured . He now wishes to forget the past eight years of his life in the galaxy and resume his normal uneventful life at home . Yet he feels haunted by his memories of his travels and cannot get it out of his mind , no matter how hard he tries ,and ends up going on yet another adventure across the galaxy .</p>

<p>In the book " The Lord of The Rings " , Bilbo Baggins is a hobbit who , after many years of peace in the Shire decides to go on a final journey to Rivendell . In the previous book he was a nonchalant person who did not have any problem staying in Rivendell for the rest of his life . But such a glorious and breathtaking adventure ,which he participated in , had a massive effect on Bilbo ,who now has no regrets and wants to go back and do it all over again.</p>

<p>Even in today’s society , our cultures and people are highly influenced by our past . The caste system in India is a scar in its rich history and its effects are stil felt today . With this information , it can be understood why discrimination and honour killings are still rampant in modern India . </p>

<p>From the examples in literature and that of the caste system ,it is seen that knowledge of the past is indeed necessary to understand the present.</p>

6

<p>That would get you a 3/6, maybe. Examples are all literature, and there are too many (four) of them. Sentence structure is repetitive too.</p>