I took a Practice SAT under times conditions and would like to know my approximate essay score and also advice on how to improve my essay.
Prompt: Is it important to question the ideas and decisions of people in positions of authority?
It is always important to question the ideas and decisions of people in positions of power and authority. The possibility that a leader could have ulterior motives not in the best interest of the people always remains. Adolf Hitler seized control of a weakened German nation that craved for a strong leader who promised to avenge Germany’s WWI embarrassment. Similarly, had the Russian people questioned Joseph Stalin’s ideas and decisions, many lives could have been saved from ruthless and unjust killings at the hand of Stalin’s regime.
The German nation was left crippled by the Treaty of Versailles and craved for a strong leader who could reinstate Germany’s greatness and world superpower status. Thus, Hitler seized control of the German government with his true motives left unquestioned. This Nazi regime went on to kill millions upon millions backed by the blindly loyal German people who unfortunately never questioned the ideas and decisions of Hitler and the Nazi regime. These atrocities may have been prevented if the people had questioned the ideas and decisions of Hitler and the Nazis.
Joseph Stalin gained nearly unanimous support throughout Russia in his part in the 1917 Revolution that introduced a Communist government that was “for the people.” The questions left unasked by the Russian people allowed this to happen and would in turn allow millions and millions of people to die due to ruthless executions and widespread famine. The Russian people would later see that this government was positively not “for the people.” If the Russian people would have questioned the motives of the Communist leaders who rose to power, this atrocious regime may have been prevented altogether.
The rises to power of Hitler and Stalin show that the ideas and decisions of all leaders need to be questioned. In these cases, revolts similar to the ones that brought these regimes to power could have saved millions and millions of lives. All people need to question the ideas and decisions of people in positions of authority to ensure no similar leaders surface.
@Nickatpauls please look at my essay for me
that craved for a strong leader
You crave something; you don’t crave for something.
Versailles and craved for a strong leader who
Same deal
These atrocities may have been prevented if the people had questioned the ideas and decisions of Hitler and the Nazis.
Not really…some people questioned Hitler. He had them killed. Look up the Night of the Long Knives.
If the Russian people would have questioned the motives of the Communist leaders who rose to power, this atrocious regime may have been prevented altogether.
What questions should they have asked?? “Is Hitler really committing genocide here?” – what good does that do?
Overall: a couple of grammar mistakes. Your second example is not explained well; you make a claim and then just repeat it a few times. What’s the evidence? Got any more details that would support your thesis?