<p>This is the October 2005 essay prompt. I got a 6 out of 12 in it. Lol. Anyway, now, two years later, I rewrote it. Please grade it:</p>
<pre><code> Prompt:
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<p>Should people make more of an effort to make some things private? </p>
<pre><code> Communication is what keeps us sane, was something that my grandmother used to tell me. She always urged me to never keep my feelings from the world, saying that they would eventually bottle-up and be harmful. Examples from literature and my own life prove this fact.
First, in the novel Madame Bovary by Gustav Flaubert, the heroin, Emma Bovary, kept her feeling from the world. She was stuck in an unhappy marriage, longing for excitement. Yearning for something new, she becomes consumed in a lustrous affair that ultimately ends in disaster. Despondent, somber, and unable to express her feelings to the world, Emma takes her own life in a desperate attempt to free her soul. Had she not kept her feelings private, she would not have ended her life as she did.
Similarly, in the epic novel the Black Dahlia by James Elroy, the protagonist, Officer Lee, too, kept his feelings about the Black Dahlia case from the world. The Horrific death of the Black Dahlia was, in his mind, a recreation of his sisters death and was thus, in his mind, a case that would do his sister justice. He became too attached to the case, which ultimately led to his dismay, for he was found buried in a shallow grave in Mexico because he chose to pursue the killer on his own. It becomes clear from Officer Lees unfortunate destiny that effective communication, with a trained professional; namely a psychiatrist, would have helped him overcome his personal attachment to the Dahlia case. Yet he chose to keep his feelings to himself and, needless to say, it was not the wisest choice.
I, on the other hand, chose, on one particular occasion, not to do as Emma Bovary and Officer Lee had done. During my freshman year in high school, I was having trouble with some bullies in higher grade levels than me. I chose to go to an authority figure for assistance, which proved to be the right choice. The principal ended my dilemma with a short lecture with the bullies in question, and I was never bothered again. In retrospect, I know that if I had kept my feelings to myself, I would not have thought of high school as an enjoyable experience whatsoever.
From the previous examples, it becomes clear that that people should make an effort to make some things known. Some things, if kept repressed long enough, can be destructive to us and those around us. Therefore, it is best that we not keep certain things to ourselves.
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<p>P.S. I apologize if I ruined the ending of the two novels for anyone who was reading them.
P.P.S. Do you think that if the essay reader was reading one of the books I used and I ruined the ending for him/her, that s/he would give me a lower score lol? (Just a thought)</p>
<p>Be honest, please.</p>