Please Help me CC Parents...this is urgent!!!! Its lengthy but IMPORTANT!! Please!

College Search & Selection
1

<p>Okay, so some of you may know me and some of you may not. I was posting last year about my Kenyon College dilemma. Basically, I applied (originally) to 10 colleges last year. I applied ED II to Scripps and got rejected. I got rejected from Bucknell, Occidental, Wellesley...waitlisted at Tulane, and Kenyon (My dream school which I didn't realize how much I loved until I visited late in the Spring and it was too late to apply ED) and I got accepted into my state university Rutgers, American and Santa Clara.</p>

<p>American and SCU gave me barely any money, making it impossible to attend.
My only choice was Rutgers, which was my obvious last choice.
I want to study foreign languages and just couldn't see me learning languages in a university setting. I really wanted a liberal arts experience. I desperately tried to get off Kenyon's waitlist with extra recommendations and letters, but it was no help. I was truly crushed about Kenyon because I fell in love with it on an overnight visit, plus they have a very unique modern language and literature major. Frantic about attending Rutgers, I decided to look up schools still accepting applications. So I applied late to Hendrix College in Conway, AR, got a decent scholarship, and just currently completed my freshman year.</p>

<p>Here is the problem</p>

<p>I applied as a transfer this year to Kenyon, Wesleyan, Bucknell, Lehigh, and Emory. I didn't think I would go back to Hendrix after freshman year because I was so set on learning languages at a school with more class and language offerings. I told myself that I was going to Hendrix knowing I was transferring, no matter what! Yet, I applied and sent the essays at a time when I didn't realize how much I loved Hendrix. I had called my mom about two months ago, and told her that even though I spent all this money on transfer applications, I didn't think I could bring myself to leave Hendrix. It was really hard for me since I put so much time into additional essays, copying forms, recommendations, keeping up my grades, etc. She said that was perfectly fine with everything and if I was happy, she would agree with whatever decision I made.</p>

<p>Well, I got WL at Wesleyan, rejected at Bucknell, have not heard from Emory...but</p>

<p>I got accepted to KENYON! and Lehigh!</p>

<p>To make matters worse, i got offered a 32,000 dollar grant to lehigh a year, and a 38,000! dollar grant to Kenyon a year. It is cheaper for me to go to Kenyon with the grants alone, besides the fact that it is closer to home ( I dont have to fly) and I dont have to store stuff over the summer etc.</p>

<p>I can really care less about lehigh, its Kenyon that is bugging me.
I wanted Kenyon so bad last year. I cried myself to sleep for weeks because I did not get in. I couldn't see myself anywhere else last year.</p>

<p>Now I have already been elected to be President of my dorm next year, and 1st vice chair of a huge charity organization. All of my stuff is in a storage bin in Arkansas, I have a wonderful boyfriend, great friends,etc. My parents are pressing me to leave Hendrix for Kenyon.</p>

<p>They think that Kenyon is giving more money, obviously more prestigious, better for my major, and closer to home. They are pressing me to go and will do anything to dissuade my from Hendrix. Hendrix does not have any linguistic course offerings, is not as prestigious, and cost me more money. BUT I am comfortable there and have so many commitments. If I go to Kenyon next year, I probably won't be able to gain the leadership type positions I have at Hendrix since I will be a sophmore starting all over again. My junior year <em>because I am a spanish major</em> will be completed abroad. So really I will only be spending my sophmore and senior year at the school I chose.</p>

<p>I don't know what to do.</p>

<p>Leave a school that isn't as prestigious for my old dream school, but lose my friends, commitments, and boyfriend?</p>

<p>Attend a more prestigious school I once loved, but make friends all over again?</p>

<p>Does saving an additional 10,000 dollars a year really matter if I am truly happy at Hendrix?</p>

<p>Is it right to leave the college that I already promised myself to concerning presidency of my dorm and a 1st vice chair position?</p>

<p>Is studying language at Kenyon really going to make that much of a difference in the long run?</p>

<p>How much will my extra curriculars weigh in (if I stay at Hendrix) versus the name of the school (if I attend Kenyon)</p>

<p>I am so distraught and extremely upset. If they had only accepted me last year, this would be different. Now I am in a bind. I have until June 15th to make a decision and I am already crying myself to sleep about it. Kenyon put me through so much emotional torment last year when I did not get in. Now that I finally have the acceptance letter in my hand, I don't know what to do.</p>

<p>PLEASE HELP ME PARENTS! My parents are a little biased on the situation so I need some outside opinions.</p>

2

<p>I'm not a parent, but I'm going to sound a little like my mom here...</p>

<p>Don't consider your bf in your decision. I've known so many people who were given great scholastic opportunities, turned them down because of bf/gfs, and then broke up a few months later. </p>

<p>Although I'm not a big fan of uprooting people, if you made so many good friends in just a year, I don't think you'll have any problems making new friends at a new school. </p>

<p>Finally, how committed are you to your career? If Hendrix offers absolutely no linguistic courses and you see youself very devoted to that career, then I think a transfer would be best. If you really want to stay at Hendrix, I'd seriously consider switching majors.</p>

3

<p>Kenyon is not all that big a deal. The money is fairly serious.</p>

4

<p>Could you visit Kenyon once more before making your decision?</p>

5

<p>Yougotjohn has a great suggestion. Visit Kenyon again, communicate with people (faculty and students) in your proposed major--see if the academics truely excite you, create the pros and cons list. Tuition bills are not due till around July 1, so you have time to make an informed decision.
Best of luck!</p>

6

<p>Oh my gosh!!! First of all, congrats on the Kenyon acceptance and fantastic financial package. :) </p>

<p>We've "met" on the Hendrix forum and you have given some terrific and much-appreciated advice there. I wish I could do the same for you here. I can see how torn you must be with this decision. :(</p>

<p>Only you can weigh the pros and cons of transferring. The money should definitely be a major consideration, unless your family can easily afford the extra $10K per year. That being said, however, no amount of money can buy happiness - and you seem very happy at Hendrix. Do ask yourself, though, how much the b/f plays into this decision. I agree with ceecee in that you should try not to let that relationship influence your decision. See if you can mentally "remove" him from the equation and think about what your decision would be if he were not in the picture.</p>

<p>I echo yougotjohn's suggestion. You should definitely visit Kenyon again, talk to the linguistics faculty, etc. before making the decision.</p>

<p>Good luck to you! Let us know what you decide to do.</p>

7

<p>Unfortunately, I haven't much experience with college and whatnot, but I do have experience in having to make those kinds of decisions, though your's are slightly more life-affecting.</p>

<p>I am so sorry if this is horrible advice or cheesy, but I am sincere; simply follow your heart. Yes, I said it. Make sure your decision is based on what you want for YOU, you NOW, not you back then. Maybe your dreams are the same or maybe they have changed. </p>

<p>But it seems like you have great opportunities at Kenyon, and who knows? Perhaps you'll be able to have twice as many friends than before!</p>

<p>I've found that if I do what I feels right, it ends up being the right decision.<br>
You can do it!</p>

8

<p>Here is the latest conclusion made between me and my parents</p>

<p>We are calling Hendrix today and we are going to try and negotiate some financial aid. If Hendrix offers a little more money, then my parents say that I can ultimately stay at Hendrix. Yet, if they don't offer more money, I really don't have a choice but to choose Kenyon. My parents feel strongly about saving money on tuition, plane fare, storage, etc. since they seem to think the economy is getting worse by the year. I have been looking at the Kenyon courses and I must admit that they have some very interesting courses and easier requirements that coincide with my major. I think what is holding me back in really my bf and some other social aspects. I already know its wrong to use him as a reason to stay. I just have to get the strength to leave and know I am doing the right thing. He is from the west coast, so I am sure this would eventually be inevitable. Anyways, my dad is calling later so I will keep everyone updated!</p>

9

<p>Can I have the spot at Lehigh? Please? :(</p>

10

<p>I am sending Lehigh the confirmation that I do not want to attend today. Are you on a waitlist?</p>

11

<p>Well, if financial aid is going to be the ultimate deciding factor, then it sounds like you're doing what you can and therefore have no need (easier said than done, I know) to stress out.</p>

<p>Think of it this way...you're torn between two places that you're pretty sure you love! Yes, leaving an established social scene would be difficult, but most schools make a serious effort to ease transfers. You would also be potentially aided by nearness to home. As a sophomore, you'll be fine...my circle of friends changed a lot after my freshman year because it grew beyond just the people on my freshman corridor. It might be nerve-racking, but realistically you know it would be okay.</p>

<p>It sounds like you have two awesome options available to you and like you could be extremely happy at either one. If financial aid is going to be the ultimate deciding factor, then I'd advise you to step back from the whole issue until that information comes through. For now, stop looking for reasons why one school or the other is best because you might end up unnecessarily confusing yourself further. </p>

<p>You're definitely in an annoying situation, but best of luck...I hope you're pleased with whatever the outcome. Both schools have enough benefits for you that while there may be minor differences, I think that in the long-run, you're in a no-lose situation in terms of experience :-)</p>

<p>(On a random note, dorm positions at my school aren't elected until the year they're served, so if you do end up transferring, you might still be able to fill some positions like this.)</p>

12

<p>valuable1212, thanks for the update. I have been keeping you in my thoughts and hope that things will work out for the best, whichever direction you take with this decision.</p>

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<p>I am sending Lehigh the confirmation that I do not want to attend today. Are you on a waitlist?</p>

<p>No, i'm a junior. I just lack the grades/stats anywhere near Lehigh :(</p>

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<p>I was just wondering what (if anything) you've decided.</p>

15

<p>thanks for your concern. i have actually decided to stay at hendrix. it is a great school and although i love kenyon, several factors come into play.</p>

<p>if i go to kenyon, i cant study a full year abroad
if i go to kenyon, i may possibly have to stay an extra semester in order to meet requirements
if i go to kenyon, although its a better school, because of the way their classes run (year long courses) i wont be "qualified" to take spanish literature courses because i have to take a year long requirement course first. this means that i wont be taking literature classes until junior year (which i originally wanted to spend abroad) and that also means i cant take any literature in a 3rd language. basically this is because in order to take any literature courses in a language at kenyon, you have to take a several year long intro courses, where at hendrix the fundamental language courses are semesters long. its kind of complicated but in the long run, hendrix is more beneficial.</p>

<p>btw i got into emory the other day! ashame that im in love with my hendrix college!</p>

16

<p>Sounds like you really did a great job at thinking things through. Congratulations on your decision (and also on your acceptance to Emory)...I hope the rest of your time at Hendrix is as wonderful as the beginning!!!</p>