<p>My teacher ripped apart my other thesis and did not like it for crap....would someone be able to read my new one and tell me if it's ok/how I can improve please. I'll pm it to you if you would be kind enough to help. thanks</p>
<p>pretty please with sugar on top</p>
<p>sure, send it to me...</p>
<p>Yes, please PM me. </p>
<p>Would that teacher be a relative of your evil totalitarian principal who refuses people to take SAT II's?</p>
<p>lol, sittingbull, Indian, how more Native American can this thread get . . .:p</p>
<p>I'll read it pal</p>
<p>HOW DARE YOU!!!!</p>
<p>@$$</p>
<p>LOL, JK</p>
<p>Yeah, i'm <em>south</em> asian</p>
<p>lol you krazy kid </p>
<p>Yeah i figured, there are probably around 0 Native Americans present in this forum</p>
<p>sittingbull, I can't send PMs because of the server issues, I hope you don't mind if I tell you my thoughts here?</p>
<p>As Orwell presents the dangers of totalitarianism and the problems involved with repressing thoughts, he subconciously presents the female characters in limited, stereotypical roles which can prove to be as oppressive as the concept he is challenging. </p>
<p>Just a little bit shorter, other than that, I think it's definently non-rip-up material</p>
<p>okay thank you. what if I just knocked out "and the problems involved with repressing thoughts" do you think that would be short enough or even shorter</p>
<p>My english teacher makes us write our thesis to at least 3 lines, but you're right, eliminating that part would eliminate a redundant statement.</p>
<p>As Orwell presents the dangers of totalitarianism, he subconciously presents the female characters in limited, stereotypical roles which can prove to be as oppressive as the concept he is challenging.</p>
<p>If that was your main problem last time, too long of a thesis, you can take it out, but I think it sounds fine with the "and . . . thoughts". It also sounds smooth taking that part out, I guess just as long you want to make it. I suppose it depends on the length of the essay, last time we were writing research papers so maybe that's why she made us write a longer thesis.</p>
<p>The thesis she wouldn't accept was "O'Brien's role is as a "teacher" of Ingsoc policy and "doctor" who works to cure Winston of his thoughts, all in the mindset that Party policy truly is the best policy."</p>
<p>She said that in that one I didn't even have an opinion. I thought I did sort of, but she hated it with an undying passion. I guess I hate it too now that I think about it.</p>