<p>Hello everyone! This is my personal essay for UW and I would really appreciate it, if I can get some feedback of what I need to improveon. Thank you very much! </p>
<p>The Personal Statement is our best means of getting to know you and your best means of creating a context for your academic performance. When you write your personal statement, tell us about those aspects of your life that are not apparent from your academic record:
a character-defining moment
the cultural awareness you've developed
a challenge faced
a personal hardship or barrier overcome </p>
<p>Directions: Choose either 1 or 2. Recommended length: 2 pages (550-600 words)</p>
<p>2) Tell us a story from your life, describing an experience that either demonstrates your character or helped to shape it. </p>
<p>Tips
Some of the best statements are written as personal stories. We welcome your imaginative interpretation.
You may define experience broadly. For example, in option 2, experience could be a meeting with an influential person, a news story that spurred you to action, a family event, or something that might be insignificant to someone else that had particular meaning for you. If you don't think that any one experience shaped your character, simply choose an experience that tells us something about you. </p>
<pre><code> My life changed when I met Mr. Kumakura, my Japanese teacher in my sophomore year. Before I met him, I had always been stressful about my life. When the stress started to stack and build up to the level where I couldnt take it anymore, I lost interest in school and my grades. After my freshman year, my friend Michael had introduced me to computer gaming. Everyday, when I came home from school, I would always find myself playing on the computer until my parents told me to go to bed. I developed bad habits such as doing my homework at the last possible minute. My parents would invariably give me long lectures about their past and how difficult their life had been back when they lived in Vietnam, telling me that computer gaming has no meaning for my future.
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<p>Mr. Kumakura taught and showed me how important education is. Everyday when I came to his classroom, he would always tell stories about the successful students he had in his class. I became inspired towards his storytelling. I loved to hear stories about his past students and how he helped shape them to be the best they could aspire to be. It made me think about my past and all the mistakes I had made. Mr. Kumakuras storytelling influenced me to change my ways and strive to be the best. I wanted to impress him and be like the students in his stories. Spurred by my new motivation, I studied very hard for his exams and quizzes and aced them. </p>
<p>I gave up computer gaming. I realized computer gaming would get me nowhere in life if I continued to play. Mr. Kumakura had inspired me to teach myself discipline and maturity. His stories had helped me to realize the importance of education and grades and how it could affect my future. I will always remember his words because thats what motivates me to continually try harder and be the best I can be. I want to be the best student in front of his eyes and hope that someday in the future, he would tell a story about me to his class. </p>
<p>Today, Im a better student that Ive ever been before. If it hadnt been for Mr. Kumakura, I would still be wasting my time and effort playing computer games. I learned how to manage my time and developed good habits. Mr. Kumakura taught me how to exceed with my life. He said some wise words that I will never forget. His class was a challenge. He brought the challenge out with his difficult tests and quizzes and I finished strong. This motivated me to challenge myself further in life where I began to take vigorous classes in my junior year of high school. I wanted to impress Mr. Kumakura and show him that Im capable of being the best. </p>
<p>Mr. Kumakura has shown me the relevance of why education and success matters. I will always remember his stories because it had influenced me to continually do my best. I will never forget Mr. Kumakuras words. Hes like a father to me. As a senior, Im currently studying very hard and doing my best to finish the year with straight As. Mr. Kumakura taught me how to be the best by forcing me to bring the best out of me. I love the feeling of being successful. I love being congratulated for my grades and accomplishments. Mr. Kumakura made a big difference in my life; his words and stories will always be remembered in my heart. He is the reason why Im successful today.</p>