@doschicos @citymama9 Since there is no way of telling for sure whether a dance supplement will help, but there are reasons to believe it may, what is gained by not submitting it? The OP’s D has dug her heels in about this, but it is not particularly helpful.
She has a very legitimate excuse—she is a teenager. A teenager who is trying to control her future. Yes, it is her journey. But I do not believe most teenagers truly understand the financial implications of their actions. IF she could get merit money by using dance in the application process, does she really understand what that extra money means?
When my D was a HS senior, the guidance department compiled a packet of applications for local scholarships. I heard about these scholarships at a PTA meeting. It seems that there were daily announcements about these scholarships and their deadline, but many students didn’t bother to apply or even pick up the packet.
D was hoping to attend an expensive private college (she had acceptances at NYU, Barnard and Brandeis. ) Our plan was to foot the bill, hoping to leave her debt-free. So I made sure she got the packet and would complete the many applications on time since every little bit helped. Although she would be able to rework essays she had already written for some applications, it would still be time consuming and D was not a happy camper.
The weekend before they were due, some “important” movie was opening on Friday night and someone’s parents were away so there was going to be a party on Saturday night. Of course D wanted to attend both. But I made it clear that she was under “house arrest” until those applications were complete if she expected me to foot the bill for her “dream” school. Luckily, she was smart enough to comply and for two nights had to ignore the pleas of her friends to finish quickly and just write anything. Clearly they were not submitting applications.
Fast forward to Senior Award Night. Almost all her friends were invited to attend. Many of them were ranked in the top 20 range. D was top 5%, as well, but at the lower end of that top range.
The first part of the evening was for departmental awards. Many of her friends won several of these top scholastic awards. They came with impressive trophies, but no money. They were based on their top grades, but had not required an application.
Then the next round of awards were announced. The ones my D “wasted” a weekend applying for. Well things changed rapidly. Since her friends never applied, they weren’t considered. They would have been her top competition as they all had top grades and EC’s.
D ended up winning 8 major awards for a total of $12,500!!! Her friends and their parents were dumbstruck. It’s not that my D didn’t serve some of those awards— she did! (She was president of the school, a top student, well liked, etc, etc), but her friends certainly would have garnered some of them if they’d applied. Several parents actually approached me and asked why my D got them all—and I sweetly suggested that they ask their children if they had applied.
My D and I laugh that for about 15 hours of work that weekend, she earned roughly $800 per hour!
And she genuinely thanked me, knowing she would never had been awarded that money without my insistence that she apply. I believe in some situations parents should step in and not just leave it to kids to figure things out. My D learned the same life lesson as her friends, but she learned it AND had an extra $12,500 in her bank account!!