Pls grade this essay out of 6

Test Preparation SAT Preparation
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<p>Learning starts with failure. The first failure is the beginning of education
-John Hershey
Assignment: Is failure educational? Must we fail in order to learn?</p>

<p>Failure is the best teacher. Some of the most revered inventors, writers and artists today have shown that failure is inevitable in order to learn because with failure, we are able to learn from our mistakes in order to succeed. Th evidence through history and life is very persuasive. </p>

<p>The first case where failure was the starting point of education is seen through the story of Thomas Edison and how he was able to invent the first electric incandescent light bulb. When he started trying to create the light bulb, he failed constantly but with each failure, he learnt something new which took him a step further towards solving the mystery. He tried and failed about nine hundred and ninety nine times before he was able to succeed, This example shows that failure is indeed educational.</p>

<p>Likewise, when I first started preparing for my SAT exams, I failed terribly when it came to writing essays but I didn't give up. I persevered and kept taking note of all the mistakes I made so as to avoid them next time. I also got loads of advise from various people who helped me grade my essays and pointed out my mistakes. With time, I continued to get better and in my last exam, I got a 12 in my essay. This experience really taught me that learning really does start with failure.</p>

<p>To reiterate, failure is an integral part of every human's life, like the popular saying goes, "To err is human". We must fail in order for us to learn. The important thing is to keep on persevering after each failure in order to finally succeed.</p>

<p>Pls grade this essay out of 6 and tell me what I can do to improve my essay.</p>

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<p>The introduction to me sounds a little off. I would restructure it to make it sound a little more powerful. Your essay is good, but lacks enough interest to score a 5 or a 6. It is also a little short. Most SAT essays that score a 9+ out of 12 have about 350 words or so, while yours is at 275. I would give it a 3/6. Keep practicing! :slight_smile: You’ll get there :)</p>

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<p>You have a good sense of organization, which is great. Your topic sentences make it clear what you’re going to talk about, and surprisingly, even most college students can’t do as much. </p>

<p>However, I agree with the other poster that you could add some more “oomph” to it. Try varying your syntax, try using a new word, try elaborating on a complex argument; try something different that will make you stand out, be it your voice or topics. </p>

<p>Also, watch your grammar. I caught a few comma splices and some informal language. Using I is perfectly fine since the assignment is about you, but try to avoid using “got” unless it’s clearly part of the style you’re attempting to portray. I sense that you’re trying to go for a more “wise and subtly dramatic” type of tone, so “got” actually hinders that overall sense. </p>

<p>Good luck! Keep writing and improving!</p>

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<p>Insidious01 and opori2 thank you. I’ll keep practising.</p>