Poor men are finding it increasingly difficult to date (income disparity)

<p><a href="http://www.nytimes.com/2007/09/23/fashion/23whopays.html%5B/url%5D"&gt;http://www.nytimes.com/2007/09/23/fashion/23whopays.html&lt;/a&gt;&lt;/p>

<p>If the women don't care, why should the men? I thought this article was going to be about how today's "liberated" women won't settle for a guy who's making less than +$50 000 of her salary.</p>

<p>ROFL, how ironic is this?</p>

<p>To generalize (I'm not saying all women), many women have desired this independence from men in social/economic situations (which, if they were intelligent, they would realize they could have by NOT giving into societies stupid mindset that only men should make bread), and now that they get what they think they want, they are uncomfortable with. Classic chick logic :p</p>

<p>In all seriousness though, I love talking to rich girls. Not only do I get them to pay for my stuff, but they generally have nice cars that they like to drive that make me look real exclusive when you've got a bad girl driving an even badder whip. It's a win win situation, I save money, get laid, AND get social status. Only insecure men could possibly complain about something this stupid. I LOOK for rich girls, and instead these guys run from it.</p>

<p>The feminization of men just continues, and the saddest thing is, they do it to themselves.</p>

<p>Edit: And if my post came off as chauvinistic, arrogant, or a little dirty it's because I am all of those things.</p>

<p>When will Third Wave Feminism kick in and proclaim that it's empowering for women to give up their income capabilities for the sake of making their dream man comfortable?</p>

<p>Never listen to what women say, watch what they do. There's no chick on earth who'd take a teacher over a brain surgeon.</p>

<p>Being poorer than a chick is like being shorter than a girl-sooner or later, someone's gonna get uncomfortable.</p>

<p>
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Men are meant to be superior.

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</p>

<p>War in 5, 4, 3...</p>

<p>The only interesting thing that I found in this article was that in certain cities women in their 20's make more than men.</p>

<p>Men having trouble with women making more than them is not something new. It's pretty obvious that women care about "success" a lot when looking at men. Also, that survey of college women preferring a high school teacher to brain surgeon is absolutely hilarious. All else being equal, the brain surgeon wins every time.</p>

<p>Well, in many characteristics, men have greater variance than women. The top of society is filled with men, as is the bottom of society. The only problem is that women do not desire to affiliate with those at the bottom of society</p>

<p>
[quote]
Well, in many characteristics, men have greater variance than women. The top of society is filled with men, as is the bottom of society. The only problem is that women do not desire to affiliate with those at the bottom of society

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Preaching to the choir? ;)</p>

<p>hah, apparently, that was the only statement that Larry Summers made (a statement supported by empirical evidence), and yet that made the rest of Harvard so angry at him that he was forced to resign.</p>

<p>so I felt like that statement had to be made. ^^</p>

<p>but maybe people on CC are more likely to consider the opinion (if they haven't heard of it already - as they tend to be young)</p>

<p>Look at the evolutionary advantage of this.</p>

<p>If poor men can't date, then they won't breed. If they won't breed, then no more poor people. Yay! Who would have thought that the elemination of poor people didn't lie mass extermination, but raising the cost of dating.</p>

<p><em>highly sarcastic</em></p>

<p>the funny thing is that poor families (as with families of low IQ) have more children on average</p>

<p>While the headline for this thread would indicate that more well off women are shunning dating men who earn less, it seems that the women with higher salaries than their romantic partners are running into hostility from the men that they date.</p>

<p>"For the first time, women in their 20s who work full time in several American cities — New York, Chicago, Boston and Minneapolis — are earning higher wages than men in the same age range, according to a recent analysis of 2005 census data by Andrew Beveridge, a sociology professor at Queens College in New York.</p>

<p>For instance, the median income of women age 21 to 30 in New York who are employed full time was 17 percent higher than that of comparable men.</p>

<p>Professor Beveridge said the gap is largely driven by a gulf in education: 53 percent of women employed full time in their 20s were college graduates, compared with 38 percent of men. Women are also more likely to have graduate degrees. “They have more of everything,” Professor Beveridge said.</p>

<p>The shift is playing out in new, unanticipated ways on the dating front. Women are encountering forms of hostility they weren’t prepared to meet, and are trying to figure out how to balance pride in their accomplishments against their perceived need to bolster the egos of the men they date.</p>

<p>A lot of young women “are of two minds,” said Stephanie Coontz, director of research at the Council on Contemporary Families, a research organization. “On one hand, they’re proud of their achievements, and they think they want a man who shares house chores and child care. But on the other hand they’re scared by their own achievement, and they’re a little nervous having a man who won’t be the main breadwinner. These are old tapes running in their head: ‘This is how you get a man.’ ”</p>

<p>YOUNG affluent women say they are learning to advertise their good fortune in a manner very different from their male counterparts. For men, it is accepted, even desirable, to flaunt their high status. Not so for many women."</p>

<p>
[quote]
While the headline for this thread would indicate that more well off women are shunning dating men who earn less, it seems that the women with higher salaries than their romantic partners are running into hostility from the men that they date.

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I agree. I'd also tend to think it's always been like this. The catalyst is now more women are high earners.</p>

<p>You want to know why men in our generation are earning less than women now? An educational system that cannot properly deal with ADHD males in their teens. All the guys I know who dropped out of school couldn't sit still in class, so they smoked tons of weed to self-medicate.</p>

<p>
[quote]
Being poorer than a chick is like being shorter than a girl-sooner or later, someone's gonna get uncomfortable. Men are meant to be superior. Feminsim is an afront to the natural order of things.

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</p>

<p>Feminism is not an affront to the natural order of things, but to an unjust status quo that has existed for centuries. Times change. </p>

<p>One problem with patriarchy, to paraphrase de Beauvoir, is that it allows even the weakest men to claim superiority over other human beings. This has a lot to do with the problems that young, successful women are seeing in the dating field. In the traditional family, the man has to be the breadwinner or else he isn't really a man. Despite the continuing evolution of the family unit, men continue to feel that they need to be superior than women to be "real men". Thus, men have a lot of issues dating high-income women, and these women in turn have to balance their success with social pressures. I find it incredibly fascinating that (as was stated in the article), men are socially encouraged to flaunt their successes, but women are pressured to be discreet. Flawed stereotypes (the dominant man vs. the passive woman) pervade our society, even to the extent that women who have "achieved equality" in the economic sense still feel pressured to behave in a tradionally "female" manner (and at the same time be completely lacking in feminine qualities to the extent that things like "nurturing" and "passiveness" hurt our competitive edge in the corporate world, where success is still often defined on men's terms - but that's a different issue). </p>

<p>
[quote]
You want to know why men in our generation are earning less than women now? An educational system that cannot properly deal with ADHD males in their teens. All the guys I know who dropped out of school couldn't sit still in class, so they smoked tons of weed to self-medicate.

[/quote]
</p>

<p>One of the reasons that the education system may be geared towards teaching girls and young women is because most primary and secondary teachers are women. Ironically, this system was set up partly BY MEN to keep women segregated into job sectors that are more "naturally female-oriented" (because all women are classically stereotyped as caring and nuturing, so clearly they should all be teachers and nurses).</p>

<p>
[quote]
One problem with patriarchy, to paraphrase de Beauvoir, is that it allows even the weakest men to claim superiority over other human beings. This has a lot to do with the problems that young, successful women are seeing in the dating field. In the traditional family, the man has to be the breadwinner or else he isn't really a man. Despite the continuing evolution of the family unit, men continue to feel that they need to be superior than women to be "real men". Thus, men have a lot of issues dating high-income women, and these women in turn have to balance their success with social pressures. I find it incredibly fascinating that (as was stated in the article), men are socially encouraged to flaunt their successes, but women are pressured to be discreet. Flawed stereotypes (the dominant man vs. the passive woman) pervade our society, even to the extent that women who have "achieved equality" (in the economic sense) still feel pressured.

[/quote]
Men only flaunt their success to get women. Women don't need to flaunt their success (or even be successful) to get men. They just need good looks. Then again, they might not even need that...</p>

<p>I found it rather telling that one of the woman described in the article was initially offended by her date's willingness to have her pay for drinks, even though she made more money than him. I have no problem dating a woman who makes as much or more than I do. I DO have a problem dating a woman who makes as much or more than I do and who expects me to pay for everything on dates. To me, that's wanting to have your cake and eat it too, and that's not fair to men.</p>

<p>Mr. Payne- That's just the problem. That kind of attitude simply downplays the real successes of intelligent women in favour of the superficial.</p>

<p>
[quote]
Mr. Payne- That's just the problem. That kind of attitude simply downplays the real successes of intelligent women in favour of the superficial.

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You think it's an attitude. I think it's biology...</p>