< The only way to make that plan work for admissions is to say found a startup in SV >
Interestingly, it costs less than $100 to make a startup company. That is really easy 
<and they="" never="" met="" with="" their="" school="" advisor="" to="" discuss="" curriculum="" planning?="" whose="" fault="" is="" that?="" and="" what="" may="" seem="" āobviousā="" at="" one="" point="" becomes="" moot="" another.="">
In the beginning of the school year I felt really bad for our HS counselor. In the first two weeks he had to deal with several hundred students that (simultaneously) wished to change/reschedule/get an advice.
So lets see, you feel bad for the kid, the parents and the counselor. Curriculum planning isnt done in the first 2 weeks of school, BUT you can see from your example that people change their minds all the time.
@mathmom <iām actually="" fine="" with="" the="" goal="" good="" grades,="" college="" (not="" necessarily="" top="" 20),="" salary="" (but="" my="" definition="" is="" probably="" lower="" than="" that="" of="" op)="" and="" nice="" job.=""> Thanks! Teenagers are often maximalists. If they dream about top-20, it is always possible to downsize later, when acceptance letters will come. </iām>
<either you="" drop="" that="" class="" (assuming="" can="" graduate)="" or="" suck="" up="" the="" grade.="">
I think in my Dās HS, she has only 2 weeks to drop the class. I wonder, could someone drop the class after the first semester? Letās say, student tried Physics, got B after a lot of struggle, ā¦ could he switch to another class at the end of the semester?
As an adult , your job should not to encourage students to hold onto what will probably become unrealistic dreams that shatter in their Sr year, but to keep a perspective and let students know that there are hundreds of great colleges that can prepare him for hi paying jobs.College is NOT and should NOT be the goal- its merely one step in the path. If a student gets into a top college- great! If not, its not the end of the world.
His future will not be determined by going to a top 20 college. He needs to start hearing that from you now- not 4 years from now.
Asked and answered above.
Organizing a new club / college classes / charity work / etc: any of these can help- but in and of themselves will not help. It matters what the kid does with it: not the class, but how it fits into their story of themselves. Not the club, but what they take from process of setting it up, running it, handling it. An extra science project only makes sense for the kid who lives for science projects.
Thatās why the MIT links I posted above are so important: it is the piece that keeps being missing from your scenarios. Itās not
that will get them into top-20 unis, but the piece that is about them- who they are, what they have to say for themselves, about themselves.
And I think that is what the other posters are trying to get to as well: of course, it makes sense to lay out a plan. But the wild card is actually the student: there has to be a space in the plan for the student to develop some depth in something beyond the classroom that speaks to them, and that is the piece that is missing here. If there is nothing else to the student but numbers and tick boxes come admissions season they will become that student shouting about how unfair the process is when they donāt get in.
<but the="" wild="" card="" is="" actually="" student:="" there="" has="" to="" be="" a="" space="" in="" plan="" for="" student="" develop="" some="" depth="" something="" beyond="" classroom="" that="" speaks="" them,="" and="" piece="" missing="" here.="">
Ok, he is 14, and he has no depth. Social, easy-going, funny, but nothing special. 
Heās 14. Tell him to repurpose an old radio shack clock into a countdown clock, and bring it to school in a mini silver briefcase case and show it to his English teacher. That might get a little press timeā¦ Oh waitā¦
<as an="" adult="" ,="" your="" job="" should="" not="" to="" encourage="" students="" hold="" onto="" what="" will="" probably="" become="" unrealistic="" dreams="" that="" shatter="" in="" their="" sr="" year,="" but="" keep="" a="" perspective="" and="" let="" know="" there="" are="" hundreds="" of="" great="" colleges="" can="" prepare="" him="" for="" hi="" paying="" jobs.="" college="" is="" be="" the="" goal-="" its="" merely="" one="" step="" path.="" if="" student="" gets="" into="" top="" college-="" great!="" not,="" end="" world.="" his="" future="" determined="" by="" going="" 20="" college.="" he="" needs="" start="" hearing="" from="" you="" now-="" 4="" years="" now.="">
I would never ever dare to tell a teenager that he is not good enough for his dream I would let someone else do this dirty job.
I understand his reasoning - if he doesnāt know his major yet, it makes sense to go to the best university, where he may switch majors and still get good education.
@ jym626 ,Heās 14. Tell him to repurpose an old radio shack clock into a countdown clock, and bring it to school in a mini silver briefcase case and show it to his English teacher. That might get a little press timeā¦ Oh waitā¦ .
I donāt think it would work in his case
Wellā¦ someone already beat him to itā¦
But that is the point- if he is that smart and social and funny- he is something special! He just needs to grow into himself. Thatās why the plan has to have spaces where he can try things and pursue them. Thatās why things like āleadership positionsā are a big deal: because it shows growth and maturing. The journey actually does matter. He may not find his adult āpassionā by the end of high school- imo, most kids donāt. BUT he can learn lots about himself, his interests, his strengths and weaknesses, etc. And those are the things that he will write about in his essays when the time comes.
Thing is, OP, you have been asking this same sort of question for quite some time, then both dismissing our answers and putting down many of the college kids you know. That does hint you are pushing.
From this thread: My attitude is very different. It is āSee what this kids wants / able to achieve. Provide him/her with a roadmap to get there.ā
Hey, guess what? You didnāt tell us what this 14 year old kid wants, other than an elite college. You said nothing about other drives, how he has been doing X, digging deeper, gaining experiences beyond more school performance.
*Lets dream that the kid would get almost perfect GPA and ACT, get AP classes and curriculum mentioned above. White boy. No hooks. Typical EC (1-2 clubs, volunteer hours, HS science teams). Not an athlete.
Does he have a reasonable chance to be accepted into top 20? Or should he (urgently) look for some additional points, because the list above is not enough? Organize a new club? Take college classes during summer break? Charity? Science project (not very excited about it, but capable).*
No. He still has roughly a 5% chance for Stanford.
Organize a new club?? Go read up on what Stanford looks for. And the rest of the tippy tops. Donāt just argue here.
Californiaa- one of my kids went to MIT. Like zillions of other kids on the planet, he read about it or heard about it when he was young and decided thatās where he wanted to go.
Our job as his parents was NOT to figure out the best way for him to get into MIT and to spend his middle school and high school years in an endless pursuit of MORE. Our job as his parents was to help cultivate his interests (some of which were academic, some just goofy kid interests), make sure he got enough sleep and played in the back yard like a kid, wrote thank you notes to his grandmother when she sent him a birthday gift or took him somewhere fun, learn to 'fess up and take responsibility when he did something wrong or hurt someoneās feelings, etc. I.e.- act like parents. When the time came for college related stuff, we worked hard to get him excited about a whole bunch of non-MIT options (since there are no guarantees in life, and nobody wanted a kid trundling off to college feeling like a loser).
And we NEVER told him that focusing on a top 20 college was a goal- realistic or otherwise. If he wanted to learn about astronomy, the goal was to learn astronomy. He fell into number theory and loved it- hey great, itās wonderful to learn something that inspires and excites you. And he also had a non-academic passion which consumed a lot of time and attention and which ultimately became the basis of his professional career (but not something one āneedsā to go to MIT to pursue).
And he got lucky- and got admitted- and says that he loved every minute of his experience there. But also has conceded that heād have loved UIUC or U Michigan or JHU or Rutgers or any one of a bunch of other schools with varying degrees of selectivity that we encouraged him to explore.
So I look at posts like yours with a lot of skepticism. I know kids who do trundle off to college feeling like their HS years were a āwasteā because theyāre going to Middlebury and not Amherst or āsettlingā for Wisconsin because they didnāt get into Michigan (or couldnāt make the finances work) and it is very sad. A jaded 18 year old kid is a sad thing- even more so when a kid is about to spend four exciting and challenging years learning and growing and developing, if only the sadness lingering over the 'failure" werenāt clouding the kids perspective.
So color me skeptical. All the adults involved in these kids lives claim they only want whatās best for the kid and Iām calling the BS patrol on that. There is a lot of parental ego wrapped up here if someone hasnāt explained to this kid that he will get a fabulous education somewhere- and his job as a 14 year old is to learn to write well and to read with comprehension and do his history homework and read the newspaper and ask lots and lots of questions about why Karl Marx is a hero in some parts of the world and the devil in other parts, and play frisbee with his friends on a nice day.
And also write thank you notes to his grandma and learn to take responsibility when he hurts someoneās feelings. Thatās key.
Sign me- MIT parent.
@blossom, I wish I could like your post more than once!
"if he doesnāt know his major yet, it makes sense to go to the best university, where he may switch majors and still get good education. "
Oh good grief. ā¦
He doesnāt have to go to the "best " university in order to switch majors and get a great education.
But that obviously is not what you want to hear.
If you had any actual experience with sending a tip top student to a college ranked lower than # 20, like I and other old timers on CC do, you would not be just repeating the naive statements of a 14 yr old ā¦
bossom - you admit yourself, your son was lucky to get into MIT. Congrats! It is easy to say āI did everything rightā when you win.
Unfortunately, I see many kids that say, āIf only I would start earlierā, āIt was so close, if only I would prepare better for that examā ā¦ and so on ā¦
I asked our HS counselor, what was the biggest regret of seniors. He told me that kids, who got into their dream college regretted that they spent too much time studying and not enough time having fun. However, kids who were NOT admitted into their dream college, complained that they should have worked harder and they really regret time, when they slacked.
So what, californiaa? The kid not admitted into their dream college ā for whatever reason ā still has plenty opportunities to get a fantastic education.
There are literally hundreds of superb schools in this country, many of which youāve never heard of.
And admissions officers are pretty savvy ā they can spot the candidate packaged by their parent/counselor/paid adviser over the impassioned kid they really want.
<he doesnāt="" have="" to="" go="" the="" ābest=ā" ā=ā" university="" in="" order="" switch="" majors="" and="" get="" a="" great="" education.="" but="" that="" obviously="" is="" not="" what="" you="" want="" hear.="">
I graduated from the best college in my country, and it helps a lot. I did graduate school at Stanford - it does help, a lot! Could you be successful after University of Kalamazoo? Yes, of course. If student is that successful ā¦ why could not he have success in HS and get into a top college? Why start low?
I know students who transferred to Berkeley and UCLA after community colleges. However, I also know the students who dropped off from the community colleges and ended up in the wrong places. The likelihood of financial success is higher after Stanford than after community college.