<p>I have a 10th grade D who is bright, focused and matured in so many ways. She's ranked top 1% at an extremely (if not the most) competitive public HS in our state. Her one strong EC is science (club officer, Olympiad, teaching elementary school students... but nothing in the research area yet); other activities are sort of superficial (JV sports, music, language clubs). I am not sure if this is a problem, but she shows no interest in selecting colleges or the college admission process whatsoever. And whatever that she knows about these things, it's usually from the rumor mills at the HS, like the rumor about this girl who gets accepted to Harvard on a resume that is even thinner than my D's, or the rumor that this wunderboy who gets turned down by all colleges he applied to! Added to my worry, she has not opened even one envelope from colleges that sent marketing materials to her. That makes me think if I hire a private college counselor, the professional could help D in the process -- thinking about colleges, focusing on the ECs etc. I am just bouncing the idea, since I don't know what else a private counselor would do. If some of you had traveled this road, would you share your experience with me? When did you hire, in 10th or 11th or 12th grade? Does it help? How much does it cost? If you would like to PM instead, please do so. Thanks!</p>
<p>Since she is in the 10th grade, don’t be too concerned yet with her seeming lack of interest in the college process. My D began to show interest in coming up with a preliminary list in the summer after sophomore year. (Once I let the college mail pile to gargantuan proportions and she began to sense that she had a lot more choices than she otherwise thought she might have had). </p>
<p>We did not hire a college counselor, although I think it’s fine to do so. My D really began to get serious about researching schools and thinking about how to put the apps together throughout junior year. Got really serious after the college visits over spring break junior year when she was able to narrow her list. Then full steam ahead throughout the summer after junior year and into the fall of senior. </p>
<p>So, my recommendation is to wait a few more months before contracting a counselor. Prep her now, however, for the fact that you think this might be a good way to go starting in the summer.</p>
<p>We spent a little over $200 to have a few hours with a well-known and recommended counselor in our area. It was tremendously helpful in two ways. First, he helped narrow the overwhelming list of options to around 8 that included reach, match and safety. Additionally, it was so helpful to have a knowledgeable middle man so that we had a mutually agreed upon game plan to approach the college search and application process that was not something that was dictated by me as the parent. FWIW, I know many sophomores, juniors and seniors who go through nearly the entire process with ambivalence, or at least far less enthusiasm than their parents.</p>
<p>I know this isn’t the answer you asked for, but I hope you’ll find it helpful.
[QUOTE=hillbillie]
I am not sure if this is a problem, but she shows no interest in selecting colleges or the college admission process whatsoever.
[/quote]
It’s not a problem. She’s not even through her sophomore year… the thought of leaving home and living independently is probably, more than anything, kind of scary to her at this stage. It sounds like she’s already on the right track toward an “application package” that will be competitive. If you start now with the nagging, and scheduling uncomfortable meetings with a stranger who’s going to tell her what to do when she has no interest in doing it, you’re liable to get some serious pushback and/or a very stressed soph.</p>
<p>I’d suggest you spend this spring educating yourself (there are many good books on the admissions process, and a wealth of information here if you tread carefully and take it with a grain of salt). Encourage her to develop further in the interests and talents she already has… Hunt around for opportunities in service, learning, research, &c that she might find intriguing, present them, and let her pick what she’d most like to pursue. This forum is a pretty good resource to start the hunt, as is your local community newspaper. If the activities are really interesting to her, she’ll pursue them with the passion that colleges are looking for and probably create her own depth, personal growth, and “leadership” opportunities – and she’ll have compelling things to write about in her application essays.</p>
<p>If you can get her to prep for standardized tests (PSAT, SAT) sometime during the summer or early fall, great – she should have some tests under her belt by midway through her junior year to ensure a less stressful senior year.</p>
<p>I can share with you from my own experience with geek_son, who will be attending his first-choice top-20 LAC in the fall. After seeing his sophomore PSAT scores and the ensuing junk mail, and then discovering this forum, I went into full Anxious Mom Mode. Sure, he was a great student, a great kid, involved in a number of activities, and good at standardized testing. But he wasn’t out there building houses, curing cancer, and taking math tests for fun in his spare time – was I a bad parent?</p>
<p>I’ll spare you the details, but suffice to say that the very activities he did want to do became a compelling part of a cohesive application that showed the extra dimensions valued by his dream school. In those activities, he rose through the ranks, excelled, became a leader among his peers, and found ways to go beyond the ordinary scope of ECs. More importantly, he grew. He worked his butt off for the love of it. He stuck it out when things were difficult or sometimes joyless. He learned a tremendous amount about working with other people, and about himself. He earned the respect of those around him, and he learned to respect the contributions of others – without whom he knew he couldn’t do what he wanted to do.</p>
<p>I couldn’t have programmed that. And since the opportunities he created for himself didn’t exist previously, I doubt a paid counselor could have either.</p>
<p>As to the college thing, visits made the process real to my son. He discovered his first-choice college on a summer road trip. Once he could picture himself there, it wasn’t so hard getting him to apply.</p>
<p>YMMV, of course. But there’s certainly nothing wrong with your daughter if she’s not interested in college admissions at this stage… and the money you’d spend on a private counselor might be better spent in funding an interesting summer activity or a (genuinely fun) summer trip with a few college visits interspersed.</p>
<p>You have found CC; A far better option than a private college couselor IMHO. The advice, guidance and experience you get from the folks on these boards can not be replicated in a single individual.</p>
<p>Your D sounds fabulous congratulations! But I firmly believe that the depth and breadth of knowledge and experience here is unmatched. Welcome and congrats for finding it so soon!</p>
<p>Oh and I echo what geek_mom said. Feel free to research schools on you own and get her on the mailing lists for those that sound interesting but if she were all fired up interested in doing it on her own at this point she would be delightfully outside the norm. Relax :)</p>
<p>A good college advisor can really help you zero in on the schools that fit your daughter’s interests, preferences, and personality. And sophomore is not too soon - I’m sure there are a lot of juniors out there who realized too late they should have been paying more attention to their “college resume.” I’ve been to many an info session where I’ve thought “Most of the high school students in this room are finding out what they really needed to know a year or two ago” as the admissions rep discussed the school’s requirements and what they look for in an applicant. </p>
<p>True, there’s a lot of great info out there - like CC - but nothing can replace the time and expertise of an experienced, certified college advisor. Look for one who is a Certified Educational Planner (CEP).</p>
<p>And no - I’m not one!</p>
<p>If you can afford it, getting a private college counselor could be a great resource. But don’t use that as a substitute for getting your own information as well.</p>
<p>It’s perfectly normal for 10th graders not to be thinking about colleges. My oldest barely got interested as a junior when I dragged him to see a few over spring break as a junior. My current junior is beginning to get interested - I took him to see two colleges in Feb. and two more this week. If you have a strong student you might encourage her to do some SAT/PSAT prep this summer. It sounds like she is on the right track with her ECs.</p>
<p>Hello hillbillie! </p>
<p>I am a graduating senior this year (thank goodness!) and I must say that your daughter seems very similar to the kind of student I was when I was a sophomore: bright, talented, hard-working, yet not entirely interested in college. As a sophomore, my mind couldn’t have been farther displaced from college/applying to college; I was completely focused on my grades and enjoying high school. </p>
<p>I think it is completely normal and OKAY that your daughter isn’t one of those robotic kids that has been preparing for an ivy league education since they were in diapers! I certainly wasn’t like that and I turned out just fine :]</p>
<p>On that note, I think it is kind of silly to hire a counselor to apply to college. Yes, it’s kind of a difficult thing to grasp, but, with a little research, managing it on your own is quite simple! I managed my entire college application process by myself and ended up getting into my dream school (Middlebury College)! </p>
<p>To begin with, go to [Test</a> Prep: GMAT, GRE, LSAT, MCAT, SAT, ACT, and More](<a href=“http://www.princetonreview.com%5DTest”>http://www.princetonreview.com) and start looking at all different kinds of schools! Find the counselor-o-matic component, type in your stats, and see what kind of schools match what you and your daughter are looking for! </p>
<p>Next, go to your library and borrow a copy of the Fiske Guide To Colleges. It is the best guide book EVER and gives detailed essays on all the major colleges in America. This book was my lifesaver during this process, trust me. </p>
<p>Next, VISIT VISIT VISIT! Visiting schools is the best thing you can do and will ensure that you guys are making sound decisions that reflect your wants. </p>
<p>Just remember, this is not YOUR college search, it is your daughter’s, she’s going to have to find the passion in her own time :]</p>
<p>I second historymom’s post. I learned more from CC than from the very experienced and well thought of counselor we used 4 years ago. So here are some bits of advice for now 1]relax. Many students, especially those who are focused on their class work, don’t start thinking about college until they are dragged on college visits in their Jr year.[that seems to be the norm for boys]
2] did your D take the PSAT this year and if so, do her scores put in the the running for National Merit standing? If she has not taken it, or her scores were not in the 95% [ sophomore scores do not count, but can point to areas that would benefit from additional focus] then have her do some prep with collegeboard SAT books this summer. A NMF level score on the PSAT can help to “solidify” and “validate” her applications, as well as put her in the running for merit $$ at many colleges.
3] come back to CC with other questions as they arise. You will find many veteran parents who are looking for ways to help “newbies” with the college application process.</p>
<p>Hire a college counselor?
For a high school sophomore, no less? Geesh!</p>
<p>Do your own homework, for heaven’s sake. Have some fun with it.</p>
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<p>Yes, that’s right, and one way she’s displaying those qualities is by ignoring all those “marketing materials”.</p>
<p>We consulted a private counselor after PSAT scores were received in my Ds junior year. The session took about 1.5 hrs. The end product was a list of schools to look at more closely and (here’s what we paid for), her “likelihood of acceptance” at these schools. Now that the cycle is complete and the decision made, you know what? She was right.</p>
<p>It’s not your daughter who needs to become well-informed about colleges right now; it’s you.</p>
<p>And the aspect of college selection where your research will be most important, in my opinion, is the financial one. What is your family’s financial situation? What can you afford? When your daughter becomes interested in selecting colleges (and she will, at some point), will you be able to say to her “You can choose any college you want” or “Our family can afford to send you to our state university and pay all your costs, but whether you can attend any other college depends on how much financial aid/merit scholarship money you can get” or something else?</p>
<p>You may also want to think about whether you and your child’s other parent think it’s necessary to impose any restrictions on your daughter’s college choices for reasons other than money. </p>
<p>The idea here is to be ready to talk about college with your daughter when she’s ready to start talking to you.</p>
<p>We hired a college counselor after DS’s freshman year, and were told we were crazy to start so early (by the registrar when we requested a transcript, by friends, etc.) but wanted to get a game plan for the next 3 years’ curriculum and testing strategy. S’s GC for the second year in a row discouraged the course-load he requested, even though we knew it was well within his abilities.</p>
<p>It was money well invested. He heard from someone he respected that it was okay to take the classes he wanted to take and to hold his ground. He took standardized tests when they would have the greatest reward w/ the least prep. (Okay, truth be told he had no prep for any standardized tests. Aced the ACT June test after 10th grade, took SAT IIs in June after APs, never took SAT.)</p>
<p>At that point we were only talking college in the abstract… large, small, east, west, sports, etc. But it got the wheels turning. </p>
<p>But I must say that once I found CC, I could glean every tip she gave us from the various boards here, plus many more, and probably won’t use a college counselor with our younger D.</p>
<p>collegeboard.com’s “How do I stack Up” rocks! It can gve you a fairly clear idea of what is needed for acceptance. petersons.com has the best college search feature IMHO and provides a nice profile.</p>
<p>“Getting In” is a great read for you and, if she is interested, for her. It and CC and the net in general wil get you going in the right direction.</p>
<p>My daughters were disinterested in the process but bought into the visits especially because I let them plan their down time and pick where we ate. So. California visits included Disneyland and Soccer Camp, PNW visit included trips to Powells Books and Joe’s Crab Shack. </p>
<p>If you feel the need for a counselor after your D has a baseline SAT/ACT and, I would say, a GPA through first semester Junior year, go for it but if you spend enough time here and bring your questions my guess is that it won’t be needed.</p>
<p>Enjoy! The college search has been one of the best times I have had with my daughters and I am sad that it is over.</p>
<p>hillbillie–I have fleetingly wondered if we should have hired someone during this process–more for my peace of mind than for my DS. I’ve been the Executive Assistant for the college apps process (admittedly self-appointed), and being one who second guesses myself alot, have had several gut checking moments when I thought I had forgotten some deadline or left some important point unchecked. CC is a fabulous resource, but it can be exhausting, too, if you believe you have to research everything thoroughly. We hire experts for much more frivilous things, like travel agents and lawn help. Somehow I thought this is/was something I was “supposed” to be able to do for my DS, but it’s a big undertaking, no doubt about it.</p>
<p>Thank you all for your thoughtful responses. Frankly, the discover of CC has caused me more anxiety than I should have, hence the question comes to mind 
At the same time, it’s hard to find a like-minded group of parents like this in real life.</p>
<p>Back to your DD, I would say let her be thru sophomore year–there is plenty of time to start fussing over this next year. If she is focused and mature as you describe, just let her do her thing and let her naturally focus on whatever she’s into. I think we get too worried about making the kids well rounded (“do more volunteer hours!”) rather than letting them delve into whatever excites them. And maybe you just check out a few books about college to read up on the topic. Or take some time off and don’t worry til the Fall. You can make yourself crazy on CC being too conscientious and not enjoying the time you have with your DD. Kinda like reading the baby books instead of playing with the baby!</p>
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<p>Why? </p>
<p>Is it the astounding “stats” you see reported by so many kids on this board? Remember, they don’t comprise a representative cross-section of applicants to any school.</p>
<p>Is it the bewildering variety of choices and decisions? Many people on this board are clamoring to get into one of about 50-100 schools. Among those, most of the LACs offer a similar product; most of the research universities offer a similar product. Within each of these major categories, schools differ according to selectivity, size, location and style (but not the educational program). Once you narrow the target features down, it’s not that hard to get pretty close to the bullseye. </p>
<p>For virtually every reach school, there is a good match school that has similar features.
Often, if you don’t get too drunk on the prestige Kool-Aid, you’ll discover that a true match school in some important ways is more desirable than the reach. With your daughter’s qualifications, it should not be hard to find an excellent match school that makes you feel comfortable. Applying EA to that school, if it’s an option, will take some pressure off by the middle of senior year while you are waiting to hear from the others.</p>
<p>From historymom, post #15:</p>
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<p>I could not agree more. I know this sentiment is slightly off topic, but since you said it, I just had to second that emotion.</p>